Currently we are having dinner together. I saw that most people were still talking about their daily activities. I also feel that today is actually quite fun, the same as usual. When I continued with other activities, at that time Ella came over to me and said something. This person is always making noise. Sometimes I'm a little annoyed by his attitude, but I also realize that what he says is actually true. After finishing, I returned to my room and currently I am with Ella. His gaze was quite serious when reading the novel I lent him. At the same time, I felt that this person only talked a lot and was actually a good person. We shared a room a long time ago and are now used to each other. Suddenly I also thought about something a little. Not only that, I feel that most likely what I am imagining is indeed very beautiful. I have never felt the outside world that everyone out there feels. Even though I felt a little sad when I realized that, in an instant I also felt hit by the fact that actually being here wasn't bad either. The people are very kind to me and of course the nurses here and the other administrators are also very kind. They are like family. Last night, I couldn't sleep. I tried to close my eyes for almost an hour and found that I wasn't sleepy at all. Meanwhile, Ella, who seemed to be busy reading, immediately looked at me and then started saying something again. When I admit that I can't sleep, Not long after, this person told me not to think too much and just close my eyes. Even though it sounds simple enough, I find it very difficult to do. I feel like I'm thinking too much right now and maybe that's the reason why I'm like this in my current situation. Once again I felt a little annoyed and not long after that I took a deep breath and tried again to close my eyes. There are a few things that have been on my mind lately. Apart from my curiosity about the outside world, I also feel a little worried about my friend who is still in the health room. When I wanted to visit him, suddenly there was a task for me and I didn't have time to set foot in that room. It's been a long time since I went there and the last time was that day.
"You still have a lot on your mind?" Ella asked me.
"What?"
"You've looked restless since earlier. You seem to be thinking about something.”
"You are right. I have a lot on my mind. By the way, have you heard from your friend in the infirmary?"
"Ah no. Why?"
"It is nothing. it's just that there hasn't been any further information for a long time. How is the condition now?"
“I think it's most likely still in critical condition. Are you worried?"
“It's very strange if the critical situation lasts like this. Did the doctor not treat it well? Aren't there also doctors working at this foundation? What did the doctor actually do?”
"That's enough. Even if you ask me, I don't know at all. But why are you suddenly asking that?”
“I just feel a little reminded. Hasn't it been a long time?”
"Yes. You are right. I also know it's been a long time. Besides, it's not under my control and I can't just find out. Honestly, there's a lot that makes me wonder. This is a secret, okay?"
"What? Are you curious too?"
“Not curious. I just want to know more about this place we live in. So far I don't know anything other than comfort and security."
“Oh you're right. But, have you never wanted to know who the person who sent you to this place was?”
"What? Ah, I don't think it's necessary. It would be very troublesome if I found out. I think the comfort I felt might disappear if I knew that. So, it's best not to know."
"You're so strange, Ella."
"What's strange?"
"I can not explain it. It's just that, I think you are different from me, who always wants to know a lot of things. I think that way, I feel much more relieved.”
“Maybe it's like that for you, but for me it would be very painful. And I don't want that to happen."
"Okay, I understand what you mean."
“Oh yeah, why don't we ever go to public school like everyone else?”
"Hah? Isn't it obvious? We don't need to because it's very complete here.”
"Even though it looks like it would be really fun to be with the others out there."
"It turns out that you are also becoming more and more curious about the outside world."
“It's because you keep saying the same thing and honestly my heart feels moved. Even if it's just a little."
“I think it's very unlikely.”
"What's impossible?"
“My wish came true. I find it impossible.”
"You seem pessimistic. Looks really annoying.”
"Hey, don't just talk."
"Yes. You took away my sleepiness."
"It's best not to just sleep. I'm not even sleepy at all."
"If it's like that, I won't be able to work the next day."
The next day. When I woke up, my head felt very heavy because of lack of sleep. Not long after that I walked and then got ready. When we were all called to the dining room, that's when I felt a little tired. I'm not like this usually and now are the times when I feel sorry for my actions. After that, I went to the toilet and washed my face in the hope that I could get rid of this feeling of sleepiness and return to normal. Ella had just left the dining room and looked like she was really fed up. Looking back, I also seem to be in a phase like that. Today I attended class like everyone else and now my eyes no longer feel as heavy as before. I listened to all the words and what the nurse said today. It's true, the atmosphere was very different and I felt a slight vibration that was enough to make me feel bored. After finishing, I walked slowly and then saw other people who were currently in the art creation room. At that time, I watched from a distance and I thought that every day there are so many things that feel the same. If you think back, it seems boring. Every day is always the same. Nothing new. If you think back, it seems boring. Every day is always the same. Nothing new. If you think back, it seems boring. Every day is always the same. Nothing new.
"What are you doing here?" Liona asked me who suddenly came. We are facing each other now.
“I was just looking around.”
"You don't have anything else to do today?"
"Yes. I think I'm off today."
"What?"
“Are you surprised? There's no need to be like that, you too will one day feel like I do now."
"Why are you so sure?"
“Because everyone definitely gets a share. Isn't everything always like that?"
"Ah, what you said disturbed my mind a little."
"What? then just forget what I just told you.”
"Not that easy. Oh yeah, I don't think you're doing well. Is it true?"
"You are right. I am very sleepy."
"You didn't sleep well?"
"Correct."
"What did you do last night to lose sleep like this?"
“I also don't know why I wasn't sleepy at all that night. And after that I ended up talking about lots of things with my roommate."
"Good grief. You should just take sleeping pills. That way you won't be like this."
“There is no such medicine in my room.”
"You can ask the nurse."
"Are you sure you will?"
"Hah? It's impossible to just leave it alone."
“I'm not sure about that.”
“You doubt something?”
“I don't want to make excuses that are enough to get me into trouble. That's why I didn't do it."
"You turned out to be really good."
"What are you saying?"
“It's rare to find someone who looks as opinionated as you. "But, I also keep wondering why everyone in this place feels like they are beneath, I think, superiors at work."
“You think so?”
"Yes. Even now I still don't understand. Do you know anything?”
“More precisely, you should look at those who are grateful.”
"Hah? Be thankful?"
"Yes. Because everyone in this place doesn't do a lot of things to repay their gratitude for taking care of them until now? Haven't you thought about it that way?"
“Ah, I just found out. Because I never thought that far ahead.”
As soon as I told him what was in my head, it felt like I had just been mean to this person. It's true, not everyone has the same view and one of them is this person who probably never thought like that. I feel a little guilty but at the same time I feel that what I just said wasn't wrong. Now Liona is still silent as if she is thinking about something. I also saw several other people who had just finished their art creation activities and they seemed very happy. It was clear from the look on their faces.
“Isabella.”
"Yes? Why?"
“It seems like I really have a lot to learn. There's so much I don't know and I feel a little embarrassed about it. I admit this because I can't bear to hold it in."
“I see.”
"What should I do?"
“Ah, maybe it would be better if you studied more like reading books or something. You can do it.”
"Okay. I am so glad."
"Yes. That's good."
“Oh yeah, about what I don't know, I'm very upset.”
"Hah? That's enough. I don't think that will make you a bit better so calm down," I said trying to calm him down. While we were talking, at that moment we heard footsteps coming from next door which turned out to be the head nurse. His gaze fell on the two of us.