Every day I can't control my curiosity about all this. There are several things that keep bothering me. A moment later I managed to find something quite strange. I saw an object lying in the room where Liona and I always came. Not long after, I just remembered that Liona had brought this object. At that time I could still see clearly that Liona had indeed brought something like this. In contrast to the past, now I feel a little hesitant when I want to find out more information that I don't know. At first I hoped to find something that had always been a question in my head. Until I was surprised. However, strangely, this time, such a desire was slowly suppressed, I don't know why. To be honest, I felt annoyed about this. But as time goes by I feel increasingly convinced that maybe what I want doesn't have to happen. On the other hand, I'm a little disappointed with this. Slowly I felt uncomfortable and it turns out this is what it feels like when I'm sad. Not long after this I spoke to Ella and this person was still the opposite of me. Apart from that, I was also curious about why all the people in this orphanage were only women. My thoughts instead diverted there. For a moment I also asked Ella and it turned out that this person actually scolded me not to say strange things that weren't important. The longer I feel, the more I want to know the reason for this. When I think back, even the nurse never said the reason why everyone here was only women. As if it were part of the rules. The night went on. This time as soon as I opened my eyes, I saw sunlight coming into our room. I quickly moved and then took a towel to shower. I saw Ella who had also just woken up from sleep.
"Wow, it's so dazzling," muttered Ella.
After I finished showering, I intended to go to where we studied. When I got there I saw the others were already there. They also looked quite happy and then I sat next to one of them. When the first lesson started, I was quite concentrated at this time and was never distracted in the slightest. After I heard everything the teacher said, I felt the question that was in my head suddenly appear. I felt like I couldn't hold myself back, luckily the class ended quickly. Unlike most people, we only study like this, never even coming to school. As soon as I walked out of this room, I felt a little frustrated. I've been holding back several things and I can't even express my high curiosity. I feel uncomfortable with this kind of thing. While I was walking, suddenly I heard someone talking. That very loud tone of voice immediately made me flinch. At the same time, I turned my head in the direction the voice came from and slowly tried to peek at what was happening. It turns out I was quite shocked by what I had just seen. My heart kept pounding and I felt a little scared.
'What the hell is that?' I muttered to myself and then immediately left.
This time I felt a little annoyed with myself. How many times have I felt like this? I don't know where I'm going and I don't even understand some of the things that often happen. I feel like there's something strange about everything that's been happening lately. My gut feeling keeps telling me that and something is wrong now. After looking several times, I found an answer that might not sound reasonable. A bleak start and I admit that myself. All this time I was alone. Even when friends are with me, it feels like I can't lie to reality. I got annoyed because something like that was really ridiculous. Maybe people out there are having fun high school years. The shadow that I always wanted to see but I couldn't feel it. Even though I only pray to God, it seems like it will be very difficult when I want that hope. Instantly I also heard their words when I accidentally passed by, I suddenly felt very sick. This is not normal. No matter how many words I've heard, this is the first time I've felt pain like this. My chest felt tight and I could barely control myself. Right now I'm looking at the sun as if I'm hit by a lot of confusion inside me. Until I remember many things, I always feel curious about something. Not long after this I walked towards somewhere. It turns out that without realizing it, I walked towards the room where the nurses were. After that I met one of them. As expected, nothing strange came out of the nurse's mouth. Mostly it's just small talk that makes me tired. When I started to get up the courage to ask about Liona, the nurse quickly smiled kindly as if she already knew what was going on in my head. When I saw that smile, I don't know why it felt so scary.
'Hah? What kind of feeling is this?' I muttered to myself.
After that I decided to return to my room. In a hurry I ran. I don't know why I feel this way. After this I realized that now I had just made a little mistake. From what I heard before, I actually lost control and strangely it's still the same as this. At the same time, I can't survive all this and I can't think clearly right now. My breathing remains irregular. I feel like I'm just going to die. Not long after that, Ella came into this room with a surprised face to see me like this.
"You are okay?" Ella asked.
“Ah, damn. Who do I think.”
“Are you sick? Which part hurts?”
"No. I'm fine. Really."
"Is it true? Then why does your face look pale? Have you seen a ghost?"
"Where are there ghosts during the day."
"Then what are you up to? Answer quickly. Don't upset me.”
“I told you. I'm fine. Nothing to worry about."
"Okay. If that's what you say. But, it's strange that recently I feel like something has changed with people.”
"Hah? What do you mean?"
“I looked at them like they weren't the only ones. Even though I've seen so many people for a long time, I still remember what it was like."
“It turns out I'm not the only one who thinks that.”
"What? You too?"