I know that he only sees the ocean, but he can't see what's inside the ocean, seeing the ocean and swimming into the ocean are a different thing, he possibly won't know the thoughts in my head unless I tell him, he possibly won't suspect anything more than the picture he sees. David is my brother, even if I should hide the details to others, I don't feel like it's good to hide it from him, but I decided to because I suspect the next thing that would come after the confession, they'll find a way to take me back than having the guilt that I am not at peace because of them.
“ There's more to the information than you know David... My problem isn't about Stella, she's not even my issue right now, her actions doesn't bother me, the fact that she laid her hands on Jackie is what's bothering me and that her action has pushed me to the end of the wall where I can no longer move or find a breathing space or peace of mind ”.
I can see the New look on David's face like he wasn't understanding where I was going with this at all, yeah, he shouldn't. I picked up the dumbbells and began doing curls on the both arms, he was just seated there watching me, I know he has got something on his mind to say but was holding them back just as I am also doing.
“ I definitely don't know anything you're talking about Willy, but the fact you still prioritize the gym in all this makes me more impressed with you, you know.... My father once told me, you don't lift weights, the weights lift you up.... I never understood those words until my mom left, I was totally down to the point nothing matters to me anymore, I stopped going to gym, I stopped socializing with people around me, more like I wasn't even leaving the house, my Dad bought me a truck so that I can take my time to learn how to drive, but unfortunately, I was ready enough, my mindset was a mess until My Father threatened me.... I know it might sound funny, but to others, his threat might sound as the dumbest, but to me, it felt like he threatened my life, he woke up one day and came to my room, living my door wide open. David, let me make this clear to you, If I don't see you at the gym at least three times in a week, I will send you out of my house to go live with your mom. It was really shocking when he made those statements, but now, it sounds more funny than ever.....”, he finished.
I don't know how dumb he thought it was, but to me, it's way more dumb than he could imagine, imagining uncle Dale say those words almost got me laughing, but I am not eligible to, this is supposed to be a sad story, not some sort of a comedy or joke. “ So you're telling me that you choosed the gym over going to live with your mom?....”, I questioned.
“ LoL.... It might sound like I am the bad person if you ask it that way, my mom was no longer the woman my Dad dreamed to build his family around, my Mom was now a woman who cared about the adventures out there than her family.... Going to live with her was like going to ruin my life, not that she doesn't love me or something, but she'll be too gentle on me that I will end up a loser, Mothers show love and Fathers are a box of discipline, if you wish to grow up like a man, then you've to follow your Father's footsteps, not a woman who thinks life is so easy and a bed of roses.... That's a huge difference between Mothers and Fathers ”.
Now I understand him better, he wasn't trying to paint his mom evil, instead he was looking out to the kind of Man he was going to become, something I never thought of, he Just gave me the best advice that he could ever imagine without realizing what he just did, he just gave me an option.
Mother superior wants me to live a life where I will find shelter, she makes the decision a mother makes for her child, a decision where a mother doesn't want to see her son suffer, but Uncle Dale, Uncle Dale have experienced life, way beyond my imagination, he has been to jail, he has lost his wife, his assets has been divided, something he worked for his whole life, he's now the one playing the general role of the parents and trying to make the family stand, he's a father who has to get his hands dirty just to see his alone son happy, yet on top of that, has thought his son discipline, his son seeing him as a role model rather than a commanding and controlling father.
“ Thanks a lot David, you have done for me more than I require, more than I thought of, if not you, which other brother can I ask for?....”. This time, I let the tears run down freely without getting on its way or cleaning it off. He brushed his palm on my hair before walking away and going back to continue his set.
I'm an orphan who has a mother and father, they don't know their selves though, they are more like a divorced couples where I got to choose whom to live with, I could have said that I was exactly on the same shoes as David, but theirs a huge difference in between, Mother superior cared about me and is doing everything possible to get a son of hers back, but David's mom, David's Mom has never visited him since she left home as if she never cared, that's what David once told me.