He went into a store at the side, I have to follow behind, he ordered for two bottles of water, giving me one when it was served, then held his, then give his card for payment. Walking out from the store, he never wasted a minute to open the bottle, gulped down all the water at a go and threw the empty can into the waste bin, showing how thirsty he really was, I held mine, will drink them later when thirsty, but for now, it stays with me.
“ So, how's it going with your training?, The fact I haven't seen you for a while made me lost track of your performance?.....”
I smiled, but in a way hidden from his sight, so he wouldn't see them, I hardly talk about my profession because no one usually ask, not that there was anyone to. “ it's really going pretty well, really planning on taking the French open by storm in Paris, would show them that Benny isn't backing down....” I said, demonstrating those words as I speak, could see he was enjoying the show, eyes fixed on me, never taking them away, could hardly even blink like he was trying to memorize whatever he was seeing.
“ I believe you.... Saw what you did at Australia, watched most of your games, already knew of your improvements back then before even asking....” he confessed. I was really happy that he's been open with me, but most of what he's speaking is something only a friend usually know off, this is hardly the kind of conversations partners have this days, everyone wanting to dive in into the sexual talks.
“ The fact the compliment later came, that's what I care about, you seeing it beforehand, then asking or saying actually, that doesn't actually concerns me if you never admitted to it by your words....” I said, giving him my own point, where he was just nodding as I speak.
He was the one who redirected the previous conversation we was having before this one, about my feelings towards him, for the fact I revealed to him that I was getting attached, that's why I had to back out really made him happy, but he didn't dive in into that, he just diverted into something else, something that involves about how he began playing the lawn tennis and his own love for it, but couldn't go for it professionally because he said he has promised himself to become a Doctor, he lost his Dad through sickness, if only he was learned, he would have been able to save him, that's what he believed.
Learning about him have been great, dropping stories about his life before now for me, I am really grateful that he's telling me all that, but I know that the cost is that I am always going to be a friend to him. He held my hand, locking our fingers together, I didn't pull away, rather I was scared, I was scared that this was not going to last, this was all nothing to him, he just sees it as friends stuff, but for me, I never had a friend this close who happens to be a Male, maybe I should let him know exactly what he's doing, maybe he'll understand and know that he's risking our friendship.
“ You can't hold me like this and expect me to remain just a friend, I'm going to end up falling for you....” I said, not sounding too confident.
“ Then fall.... I'll always be holding your hands to make sure you don't reach the ground....”
This time, emotion was in his voice, as if he's losing control, my presence is breaking down those walls that seems to be separating us. Before I knew it, he removed his hand immediately, coughing inside his throat will mouth closed, hands traveling into his pants pocket immediately.
“ So, what would you love to do?....” he asked me, his boldness back in place like he didn't just lost his guard seconds ago. With a smile on my lips trying to soften the blow, I decided we go for a movie night, we can enjoy the performance and entertainment before going our separate ways, he agreed to the idea as we set out for the cinema.
Waking up, I realized that I was resting my head on a shoulder and I wasn't at home, his scent hit my nose, that's when I realized that I was resting on his shoulder and the movie was still on, he was holding my hand, showing his protection over me, I didn't know when or how I slept off, I'm not used to dozing off in an uncomfortable area, why did I happened to do just that this time?.
I got my head off his shoulder, that's when he realized that I was already awake. I could tell his attention was now on me rather than the show. “ Ready to go home Benny?....” his voice was gentle, full of love and care, I wonder how I came to know this feelings, something that has always been foreign to me, but here I am, killing it, living like I was used to this.
I nodded repeatedly, showing that yes, I want to head home now, though it was dark, I can tell he can make out my figure agreeing, the light from the show helping to lighten up the background.
He didn't remove his hand from mine this time, he helped me up as he held my hands, as we started going up the stairs and leaving the show room. Coming out of the brightness, I checked my wrist watch and realized that it's almost late, it's almost half past nine at night and I am still out, I brought out my phone, realizing that I left it on silent because I was out to meet someone important, I turned on the screen. 17 missed calls, from Jade, Oh God.... I've an explanation to do, I just called with a voicemail, telling her that I am on my way back, she should cook me when I get back, not out here.