What just happened?, Did she just kissed me right now?, How courageous can she be to make this move without even thinking twice?, Maybe the idea has already digested inside her head, but me being oblivious to it feels like the idea just popped up?. Is it because she's here that she decided to kiss me in her presence?. Questions continue buzzing inside my head with her lips still on mine, should I reciprocate about this kiss or not?, How would Steve see this?. After all, this car is his, and here I am kissing in his personal space with a guest he never invited, a quest whom he is acquainted to.
     I never pulled away from the kiss, as much as the questions were running inside my head, I was also enjoying the kiss. I can't see what's happening behind me, but with the look on her eyes staring behind me, I can tell that she's having fun behind my back too, not just the kiss, someone behind was staring and that person is definitely not taking this lightly. I decided to push myself back away from the kiss, her eyes on mine, looking right into my eyes to see what's going on inside my head, the questions she's probably asking herself right now concerning me, me too doesn't know it, the look on her facial expression shows that I am not mistaken with the idea going through my mind.
“ Why did you kiss me?”.
The question came out gentle, just the way I wanted it to be, she didn't reply my question, just giving me that intense look that shows she's maybe questioning herself for her action right now. I gingerly turned around to see the facial expression of the one behind me, but no, she was no longer there, she has already went on her way. I have this urge to go after her, but no, I can't do that, I am not supposed to do that, I should avoid being trapped, not by her, not by anyone. I returned my attention to Rose who's sitting beside me, who just stole this kiss away from me. Her lips were so soft that I found it hard to resist, if felt like I was attached to her in those moments. She looks like she's feeling guilty for her action, the look she has on her face is getting dull as each seconds pass. Steve came inside the car, a smile on his face, not bothered whether I was kissing Rose in here or not, he doesn't seem to care about what's actually happening right behind him.
“ Is she coming with us or should I wait for you guys to finish so that she can take her leave......?”.
Rose tried to get down from the car immediately but I never hesitated, I grabbed her by the arm, dragging her back into her sit, she has this confused look on her face, not knowing what I am thinking or trying to figure out what I am actually thinking, I am good at reading people's expression, and Rose's own is no different from what I am actually thinking right now, bringing her closer to me gently with my right palm at the back of her neck, I placed a kiss on her lips.
     I feel like I went on autopilot back there, returning the kiss felt relaxing, yet like a huge move. If I had allowed her to just walk away oblivious to the emotion that might be passing through me, she might end up feeling hurt just like the other times I made her feel that way. Rose is my type of girl, as well as Deborah, but the fact that she's my best friend's sister, it felt like I am crossing a boundary, especially for the fact that Brian is out of reach at the moment. This kind of stuff seems beneficial to me concerning my current situation where I am still grieving for the loss of my mother, but taking an escape through my best friend's sister is something else, something kind of unacceptable, breaking the bro code.
     “ I feel like I'm doing something wrong Steve, what would be your decision if you were to be in my shoes where you starts having feelings for your best friend's sister?”.
There's was this bit of a sudden silence from him, either contemplating on his answers or he actually didn't hear my question, I was about to repeat myself when he suddenly spoke out.
“ That's not actually how I see it, from what I have seen so far, she's the one into you, not the other way round ”.
Yeah..... He just hit the hammer on the head of the nail, yet giving no answer to the question, one of the things I should learn from him.