A week mourning have passed, his memories were fresh in my mind, but happiness is what I know Brian would wish for me, he makes hard things look easy and he makes intense situation looks soft, he just knew the button to press to put everything back into default, and by his inspirations, I am going through Life in the absence of my mum, instead of feeling all alone like I had done when my Dad left me, I am feeling relieved that my mom left with a smile on her face knowing that she did a good job, she did an extremely good job when it comes to training me up, despite the situations where I drained her energy, made her cry, made her miss the presence of my Dad, stood in the way of her happiness with Mr Peter, but here I am, all acting matured just because she had finished her job well, she left me in a safe better hands where I can thrive and continue a healthy growth.
     “ Today is the day boys, we finished as the runner-ups the last time after crossing this stage ...... So here's what I want to tell you boys, I don't want you guys to look at the picture where you are on a mission to pass this semi finalist stage, I want you guys to have that mindset that this is nothing but a test, a test to see how we are going to correct last year's error and listen to me boys, I am not here to beg you guys to win with few points, I am here to encourage you guys to top them by huge margin, disgrace them, bully them and let whoever that's gonna show up against us have their heart stuck on their throats where they will choke, where they will have nothing but fear inside them, do them dirty boys...... Let's go!!!”.
     We jumped into the game were we are fighting to be the finalists, this is the first time I am playing with them, missed the other two games before this stage, and by the look in the faces of my teammates and the positive words of our coach, I guess they view this opposing teams as the underdog in this game. I looked around the stand, she was there, sitting beside her friends, cheering up for us, her eyes were fixed on me, much more like she's just cheering for me, cheering for me to show them what I have got, I smiled at her, then turned my attention to my teammates around, no more distractions, it's about time we take on this game, they might be seen as the underdogs, but they are still here in the competition and serves as a huge threat to our progress in the next round, you can do this Ben, you can do this, all you have to do is believe in yourself and in your instincts, go by the coaches instructions and you will prosper.
     Words of encouragement is something I need most now, and having given it to myself shows that I myself believes that I can get past the boundaries holding me back, I can pave way for myself and do a great favor to myself by playing well and impressing the coach. Bonding with my teammates is the key and all of us heeding to the coaches advice is another step.
     The game have been going as easy as everyone could have thought, the opposition are the underdogs indeed, at this point, we are maltreating them, beating them up for good with the scoreboard reading 73 - 18, a clear huge impressive gap, our coach wasn't even stressing himself much, just sat silent focusing on the game like he always does. I can remember sitting beside Deborah last year when the school team lost in the finals, the coach was way opposite the way he is right now, he was shouting and controlling the team all through the game, and sitting beside Deborah was quite traumatic, because I was a ghost, a was ghosted throughout the game as she continued cheering on Steve, she even made me join her to cheer on Steve during the halftime, I can't believe I disgraced myself then by allowing her use me the way she wanted all because of my feeling for her.
     “ What are you doing Ben?, Are you lost?, How could you let that happen?, He was your man, what was you thinking?”.
Wow, I guess I was lost in thought while in the middle of the game, thinking about the past scenario that played out here last year, seems like I was always meant to be shouted at, drifting off in thought during a game like this, way to go Ben.