I wonder if I am the only one experiencing this, or is it something normal for some people out there too?. Whenever I am done having a conversation with someone, on leaving them, the conversation begins reviewing itself in my head, I began to review to see whether I have mistakenly said something bad along the conversation, or along the conversation happened to say something embarrassing or even made a bad impression in the whole conversation.
Seated back in my office, I feel this sudden guilt inside my chest like I was maybe too hard on her, I was surely that I was careful with each word that left my lips, why the sudden guilt?. My phone began to ring, people hardly call me during work hour, who might it be right now?. The name on the screen brought smile to my lips, I wasn't expecting it to be her, she doesn't call, like forever I can say, lol, always calling once in forever.
“ Hello Mom....”, I answered the call, happy that she was calling, yet wondering why it has to be during working hour. “ Hello son, good to hear your voice Davy..... I'm calling to know whether you're at the office right now, are you?.....”. She asked. I told her that I was in right now, she definitely has her reasons for asking, mom is a very busy woman just like Dad, but she treats us as priority even though we seem to have been going distance since both of us left the house.
“ Okay, I will be stopping by any minutes from now, be expecting me.....”, she disconnected the call, I checked my wrist watch and saw it's almost getting to 13:00, I opened my office door and saw Miss Joseph about to knock on my door, but then was held back seeing me opening the doors. “ Sorry Sir, I was about to knock, wanted to let you know that I'm off to go get you lunch.....”, she said, looking up onto my face, her suit wasn't on her body, rather on her chair, she was putting on her blue shirt and a pencil skirt that made her tiny waist visible, making it quite known that she works out, those hips looks in shape, more like a result from workload than naturally given.
I just nodded my head, giving her my permission to go. I left my office door open like it was used to be before I got myself a secretary, I did it so that when my mom knocks and with Miss Joseph not being around, I will go answer to the door, letting her in.
I tried typing in more words before I heard the knock I was expecting, I was really happy to answer to her, to welcome her in, but if Dad was aware of this, she probably wouldn't be much in support of this visit, he might be so happy within that his wife showed up to visit him, but like always, he's blank, I can even imagine his poker face look right now, how stoic he usually is.
“ Hey Mom, Good to see you....”, I welcomed her inside, giving her my embrace, a feeling I have never had for quite sometime now. “ Yeah, I know my son, always acting like I am mostly welcomed, yet after leaving here today, I probably won't see you again unless it's a special occasion, definitely avoiding us, I can say...”, she's saying those words as a joke, but deep down too, I know she's feeling bad that I have been this absent for a long time, that's just how it felt when I began missing Jack's presence after being away from home for a long time, I even cried once, remembering memories I had with him and seeing he was no longer there, so yeah.... I know how my mom is really feeling about my absence right now, I will definitely try making some time to always go meet them from now on.
“ You might be wondering why I am here, you see, today is my free day from work, so I happened to make every single one of you delicious meals, Benita got hers at home, she also took your Dad's own to him, I made plans and delivered Jack his, even my grandson got one too, so I am here to present yours to you, I know you definitely might be missing mom's home cooked meal......”.
The joy I felt was beyond words, getting me to my knee and balancing myself with the other leg as I hugged her, she's the best woman I have ever known, always having us in her thoughts always. I was the one who got the same huge muscular frame like Dad, my mum now looks smaller to me than her normal size when I was growing up, feels more like I was the one who got Dad's genetics most, probably because Jack was an athlete who mostly has lean muscles, if not, he definitely would be putting on the same size as me too.
The door opened and Miss Joseph stepped in, she was carrying a waterproof package which definitely have my lunch Inside it, but right now, I am already stuffing myself with my mom home cooked meal.
She greeted my mom respectfully, her hands placed together and relaxing on her skirt as she bowed gently to offer her greetings. No no no..... I know that look on Mom's face, I hope she stop making that face if that was what she was thinking.
“ Mom!.... ”, I gave her a serious look, food stuffed inside my mouth as I muffled. “ What?!, Did I say anything?....”. She asked, she didn't say anything, but I know what she was thinking, I have no interest when it comes to women for now, none of them can give me the level of loyalty required, that's something this generation can hardly produce, lucky that Jack got one of them, but for me, it's a no no.