**move 008**
< t o s h i r o >
"THAT'S HOW I LOST HIM…"
Saki said this time with a threatening voice, "Would you just let Misao walk out of your life?"
Let's go back 7 hours ago...
IZAKAYA (PUB), MISAO'S BIRTHDAY.
"Guys, this is my friend from my hometown, Saki."
Misao nonchalantly introduced Saki to everyone as soon as he arrived at the pub we're currently at. Today is Misao's birthday and we're celebrating it on a weekday. Well, it's a good thing all of us don't have morning class tomorrow.
Oh, but I don't know about Saki.
I don't even have an idea if he's still in university…
"Hello, thank you for inviting me…." Saki greeted with a cheerful smile, his eyes traveled from Fumihiro, Eisuke, Youjin, Keita, until they met mine. "Hi Toshiro."
I just nodded.
"Hi Saki. I'm Keita. We heard a lot about you…" Keita said as Saki sat on the empty chair beside Misao. He made a subtle and quick glance at me whilst giving me a knowing smile.
"Really?" Saki's eyes brightened as he turned to look at Misao, corners of his mouth curved in a big gentle smile. "What did he say about me?"
"Well… that both of you were good friends in high school…" The confidence in Keita's voice faltered as he slowly became flustered. "Right, Youjin?"
"Why do I feel like everyone's heard about Saki-san except me?" Fumihiro chimed in, eyeing each one of us as if we intentionally left him out.
I explained to Fumihiro, "It just so happened that we met Keita and Youjin last Saturday when I asked Misao to teach me… Earlier that day, Misao and I met Saki, that's why… we just kind of talked about it."
"And you're also with them Eisuke?" He turned swiftly to look at Eisuke.
"Nah… Youjin and Keita were on a date that day, why the heck would I be there?" Eisuke explained calmly as he took a sip on his beer. "Ah, but I heard about Saki-san. Youjin briefly told me about it."
Something clicked inside Fumihiro's head then he stared at me, throwing me a suspicious look. "What? You guys went on a double date?! I thought you—"
"D-Double date?!"
"Toshiro, did you actually –"
"Fumihiro…" Misao interrupted, "It was not a double date. I won't even call it a date. We just happened to meet Youjin and Keita at the Ramen Shop after Toshiro finished his school work. He even paid for my meal as 'pay back'."
"What's the matter even if they actually went on a date? What is it to you? You're not even drunk yet, you're already acting that way…" Eisuke called out, then he placed a bottle of beer in front of Fumihiro. "There. Drink first…"
I heard Youjin chuckled. "It would be nice if it really was a date, right Misao?"
Misao picked up pieces of meat from the griller then carefully dropped them on my plate. "Yeah."
There's a subtle smile on his lips that no one would even notice unless they're watching him closely. Misao's stern face can intimidate someone at first, and I'm not gonna lie, even I hesitated for a long time before approaching him. But later on, I found out that he's actually quite expressive in his own way.
I know because I've been watching him for four years…
"Ah, just as I thought. Misao, you're dating Toshiro?" Saki leaned closer to Misao, their shoulders almost touching.
"No. Misao and I aren't like that. We're just friends."
Wait. 'Just as I thought' he said…
"Ha? Impossible! I really thought you guys were dating. You don't have to be shy, Toshiro. I know about Misao's preference."
Misao let out a sigh, "Saki, Toshiro and I don’t have that kind of relationship, 'kay?"
There was a sudden knot in the pit of my stomach when I saw Saki-san's smile grew bigger as he stared so gently at Misao. I know for sure, that's not the way one looks at a friend. I know, because that's how Misao looks at me.
---
AFTER CHATTING FOR A FEW HOURS, I found out that Saki is no longer a student. He and Misao were classmates before but Misao had to skip a year due to an incident they can't talk about.
'It's already in the past, no need to bring it up', they said.
But the truth is, I want to know. I really do. There's a tiny part of me that was curious but more than that, I'm worried. Does it involve his health? His life? Does it have something to do with him not being in a good relationship with his dad?
I want to know about it so I won't end up unconsciously hurting him. So that, I'll know what to do if it involves his health. He's living in this town alone, he has no one watching over him. Taking care of him.
Misao and Saki were sitting across from me. I can't help but notice the way Saki treated Misao – the way he's fondly paying attention to him, the way he would touch him with every chance he got, the way he's looking after him.
There's no way they're just friends…
I immediately covered my mouth the moment I realized I almost let those words escape my lips.
"Toshiro, are you okay?" Misao's gentle voice filled my ears despite the noise inside the pub.
I stood up without sparing him even a glance. "Yeah. Uhm, Excuse me, I have to go to the toilet for a bit."
I could hear their cheerful conversations as I walked my way to the comfort room. This was supposed to be a happy occasion – it's Misao's birthday for fuck's sake! I don't like that I'm feeling upset. Saki-san is Misao's friend and he even travelled far just to celebrate his birthday with us but… the more I realize the fact that Saki knows a lot about Misao that I didn't know I can't help but feel envious and mad at myself.
Are we really friends?
I just learned that he has a younger sister and that he likes cars. If not for Saki, I wouldn't even know about such trivial information about Misao. When will I even know?
"They're really getting along better than I thought…"
I instantly turned to the direction of the voice – it's Keita. I didn't notice he also entered the comfort room. Maybe, I was too deep in my thoughts. He stood in front of a urinal to take a leak.
"I mean, Misao and Saki." He continued when I didn't answer.
I pretended I was busy washing my hands, averting my gaze from Keita. "Why wouldn't they? They were best friends."
He snorted, "Best friends? Not buying that."
"Why?"
"Toshiro, you know exactly what I mean. I'm not blind and I'm not that dense to not notice how Saki looks at Misao, also how he tries to touch him every chance he gets." Keita walked in front of the sink, and then turned the faucet on to wash his hands. When he glanced up, our eyes met through the mirror. "You noticed that too. Right, Toshiro?"
'Yeah…'
"I don't get what you're trying to say, Keita."
I hurriedly left the comfort room. I thought I hated that I noticed it but I hated it more that someone actually said it to my face.