"Hi Vy, how are you? Did you two already leave? I'm preparing my things now. They said I will be fetch by some guys and they would bring me to their rest house in Pangasinan," Gail said in a happy tone. I smiled with that even though I still can feel the sadness in my heart. I somehow still felt better that Gail is at ease now.
"I'm fine. Can we talk for a while," I said in a low tone. I don't want Lucas to hear what we are talking about.
"Are you sure, you're okay?" She said in a worried tone. I bit my lower lip and stop myself from crying. I couldn't answer right away, I waited for some minutes until I became calm before speaking again.
"I'm okay. I-I just feel worried about the situation," Though it was true, I still couldn't name the reason why I felt this sad. I also still couldn't figure out why all of this come to this point. We were better than this, Xavier.
I heard her sigh, "You're not okay Vy, I know you. Please tell me what's wrong?"
My tears fell down as I heard her say that. I wore my hood and pushed myself to not look at Lucas side so he wouldn't notice.
"I will, maybe later or tomorrow. I'll tell you Gail. Keep on talking," I pleaded. Gail knows me so well, she understood it. She told me about how my teammates worried about me and she told them we were going on a vacation for now. She also said that she refused to tell them that we were with Lucas to make sure that we're safe. I cried silently as I keep on listening to her stories. Though she tried her best to lift up my mood, I still couldn't stop myself from feeling this down and sad.
Yesterday, I couldn't understand Lucas. But right now, I couldn't understand myself even more. I have never been this frustrated my whole life. I have never felt this strange feeling all this years. I didn't even had the chance to be confused nor lost about the fact that my parents decided to abandon me on an orphanage and the first family that took care of me ended up returning me to the facility after some months. I didn't even dwell on it and felt this down.
I fell asleep when the call ended. I woke up feeling cold and when I opened my eyes, I saw the sun is already up but I am still freezing. I have a cold again. I sat properly and hugged myself. I didn't ask for them to low down the aircon for them to not notice that I'm not okay. But I wish I could. I wish allowing myself to feel comfortable for a bit wouldn't be a burden to them.
I tolerated it until I couldn't anymore. I was freezing so bad I tried calling Ram.
"R-ram," my voice sounds so bad. Ram worriedly looked at me and drifted his eyes on Lucas. I just ignored it and tapped the side of his chair, I felt so weak.
"C-can you please low down the aircon, p-plesae," I said while shaking. I also felt dizzy and weaker as time goes by.
The man beside Ram low down the aircon but I was shock when Lucas suddenly reached out for it and turned it off. He sat down again and looked at me sharply. I avoided his gaze and pushed myself to the side of the seat far away from him. I don't want him to know that I am sick.
I managed to calm down myself after a while. I loosen up a bit and sat comfortably while I looked at the scenery outside the window of this car. We were all silent when Lucas started to talk to me.
"And when are you planning to tell me that you're sick?" he asked irritatedly. He even reached out for my neck and forehead to check my temperature.
"You really are fucking sick, Veronica Marchella. Don't you care about yourself?" he said angrily. I looked at him weak, I shook my head and sigh.
"I'm sorry. It wasn't my intention to make you worry. I'm okay," I said, my voice still sounds weak.
I saw his jaw clenched and his face hardened. He's even mad now. What now?
He's mad and I can see it in his eyes. Unlike yesterday that he only acts mad now it's visible in his eyes. His eyes is piercing it felt sharp in my chest.
My tears started to form at the side of my eyes. I closed my eyes to stop it and for him not to notice that I'm about to cry. It hurts that he's like this to me. It hurts because he treats me this way. I don't know what I did wrong. We were okay, he's okay. But now, I don't know. It hurts that he didn't reach out to me for days and now that he's here, he's like this. It hurts that he's in front of me but he's so different. This is not the Lucas I know. It hurts me but I don't know why it does. I don't know why it felt like this. I don't even know if it's right to feel this way.
"Sorry," I said and looked away. My eyes remained closed as I stop my tears from falling. 
He didn't say a thing. I just felt his hands softly pulling me towards him, then he hugged me. I can almost sat on his lap with how he wanted me close to him. He even put my legs on top of the seat and hugged me even more. He's sitting comfortably while I am in his hug feeling his chest. 
I wanted to move but I couldn't gather my strength. I don't want him to do this to me while he's mad but I couldn't ignore the fact that I felt better after he's done this.
"Let's stop on a convenient store and buy some medicine for her. Also, buy some food for us. We'll wait here," Lucas commanded. Maybe it's lunch that's why he decided to stop over for food. I remained silent and I tried my best not to move even an inch. He's still hugging me but he avoids looking at me. My face is near his chest so I was resting there. I couldn't stop myself from pouting when I realized that his heartbeat is fast. Maybe he's really pissed/ He doesn't want this but he doesn't have a choice. He's really mad that even his heart beat is getting fast just so he could control himself.
"Why are you pouting?" he asked irritated. I was shocked and bit my lower lip. I didn't know he's looking at me!
"Nothing," I said, my voice still doesn't sound good.
"Tss."
I breath heavily when I heard him hissed. He doesn't have to do this if he really doesn't like it. Why would he push himself to this if he really doesn't like any of these? I really feel like a burden to him and it hurts a lot. It hurts so much, it felt even deeper than the cut I got from liking Xavier blindly.