This time, everyone who seemed to be in this place was like an insignificant shadow. I feel the same sensation over and over. When all those thoughts were focused on the one thing that until now made me feel this way, it felt like I was back in another strange thing in the twinkling of an eye. Something that recently happened and even that just made me feel even more tired. I've seen people who just laugh and it's different from what I feel. It was at that moment that I realized more and more that all of this was just an illusion. When I returned in solitude to my spacious room, I could only imagine that this world was like what I was seeing right now. I feel the same way and it just makes me even more annoyed. I can't stop thinking about various things that actually don't make any difference to all of that. I feel it clearly. There are also many situations that even make me almost lose my mind. Luckily I can still control myself and until now I still feel peaceful until now. This irritating sensation continued to emerge quickly and made me feel even more irritated. When I start to remember bad days like this, I feel like this has gone too far and I can't hold myself back any longer. I got up from my bed and at that moment I went back to check several internet pages which until now I am still monitoring if, for example, at any time something strange happens to me. Malicious comments and whatnot is like everyday food and I now have to deal with it all alone pretty hard. They write strange things and say all that to me when it turns out that in reality they only dare to type on social media. I can't stand all this anymore and want to get back at them all. Not long after that, I heard my cellphone ring and when I saw it was Alona calling me. I immediately picked it up quickly.
"Hello?"
"Hey Julie. There is good news for you.”
"What?"
“This may sound far-fetched but a few people have been talking about you and they seem interested in working with you. I've already given you your contact number and wait I think they'll be back in no time. You want to be busy right? This way you can get it.”
"But why did you do that for me?"
"Come on. They just feel interested. And you know why? That means you have the potential to be a star. Did you forget that important part?”
"Ah, so it seems. I honestly don't feel like it's really me.”
"Hah? what are you talking about? Come on, don't be so pessimistic. I know you are really great and one more important thing, they are very happy when they see you even just in the media."
Ah, in that case, I guess I have no other choice.
"You are right. You really have to have a lot of positive activities. This will help you in your future career. Don't miss this opportunity.”
"Okay, I understand what you're saying. Thank you Alana."
"Yes. Not a problem."
According to everything I thought, that in the end it would be like this. I saw the reality in front of me like a movie. It just doesn't make sense. When I feel something that I really can't control and many other things that are quite strange. I feel that all of this is just nonsense and instead will only make other things in my life. I feel the same way and this time I can only smile happily. After Alona said all the things that were in his head, I saw that the person was telling the truth. At that moment I became relieved. After several times thinking about this unpredictable me, I felt tired myself and it turned out that all of that actually brought other things that made me feel happy in an instant. Shortly after I went back through all the comments people wrote on internet forums. Most of them always say weird things and it really hurts my eyes. After I realized one thing, I saw something really unbelievable. They write things like this already like someone conceptualized it. I felt something very sensitive even if only for a moment and after that there was nothing different from myself. The next day, when I was starting to wake up from my sleep and get out of my bed. I saw the same scene again and this time I started preparing for my morning. After that I went back to check the forum page again and it was in accordance with what had been expected. They just won't end and I'm already feeling annoyed myself and that's when I ignore this. At the same time as soon as I finished my breakfast, at that moment I immediately got up and started going to campus. It just so happened that there was an early morning class and I had to leave early. On the way there, I saw several people who looked tired even though it was still very early in the morning. It's like they're going through something bad in their life and that makes me even more curious. When I got on the bus and right then and there I accidentally bumped into someone and immediately apologized on the spot, I felt embarrassed and couldn't hide my face at the same time. Soon after I sat beside someone who was none other than my classmate. This person seemed to be reading a book from earlier and wasn't looking at me properly. I then looked at my phone and at that moment this person started to say something to me.
“You seem very busy,” this person said to me while closing his book.
“Ah, yes. I guess it is."
"I haven't seen you like this in a long time. Have you got any new activities?”
"Correct. I'm doing it. But, why do you ask me like that?”
“Ah, I just wanted to know how busy someone like you is. Because I see you rarely come to class. I thought you were really working."
"I see. Your guess is not wrong. I do have a lot of activities and to be honest it's really tiring."
"I can't imagine if I were you. But it was great.”
"What?"
"This is not a compliment. But just an expression, "he said with a friendly smile.