After a few hours, I felt that all of this was torturous. Feeling bored and lots of erratic thoughts, at that moment I felt that there was indeed something wrong with all of this. I saw a lot of things out there that I never expected. I also had the feeling that there was some kind of strange thing that even pulled me into it slowly. However, right now I can only think that it all seems really annoying and also ridiculous. I'm like a worm and only they look at me with one eye and make me look pathetic. This time I'm really angry with all that even I also feel disgusted. The night continued, all the things that previously weighed on this head have now almost subsided. I wished that maybe the world was as dark as it is today. I also saw that from them that even made me feel curious. They kept talking like it was all really good and I couldn't help but listen to their bullshit. Before long, I felt that staying in this place could also make my head explode. That's when I decided to meet someone tonight at the usual place. I hope that tonight it will all be over. The last time I saw that person was somewhere and it seemed like he had some business to attend to. I could only watch from afar and not greet that person for some other reason. Until finally I felt stupid if all of that turned out to be only the beginning of regrets that even up to this moment it was still not finished. I feel that it was all my fault and this time I don't want it to happen again. Arriving at the destination, I calmly entered this bar room and at that moment I saw that person's face.
"Wow, it turns out you've arrived huh," said Julie.
"You're the one who's late in coming. did something happen on the way?”
"Nothing happens. I did come a little late on purpose. Do you know why?"
"Why?"
"Because if it came earlier it wouldn't be me."
“You are indeed strange. By the way, why did you call me here? What do you want to say to me?”
“To be honest it's a problem at work. You should know too. Why don't you care about all that?"
"Honestly, I don't really understand what you're saying. workplace? What workplace?”
"What are you saying? You have no idea? Isn't that person… no, obviously everyone already knows you should know too.”
“Are you desperate? How can you not see the facts that are in front of your eyes? I thought it would be like this."
"Impossible."
"Up to you. Even if you still don't believe it's useless. You better be careful with everyone in there. They don't show everything right away. It turns out that you are very innocent, huh Julie?”
"Stop."
"What?"
"Unlucky. I should have remembered everything. But why?"
"Ah, maybe you're not feeling well. You should see a doctor in your condition as soon as possible."
"No need. I'm really fine.”
"Is that so?"
"Yes. it's really okay."
"This is you."
After I realized with some of his words, I felt that something was wrong. There are many things that I don't even realize and I feel that it will only make me normal. I came home feeling more confident. The night ended quickly and now I can only think silently not like I usually do. It's been a long time since I felt this way and now I truly understand this world. The next morning, when I walked to campus and saw many people talking to each other. The noise was strangely not bothersome at all. Slowly I also walked to enter the room, and not long after that I met them. Such an unusual look, it felt like I was being intimidated. I felt that they really hated me after that incident. At that moment I started to look away and no longer see them. Not long after that, I also experienced a number of other strange things, which have often happened. Someone deliberately let everything mess up and even I don't understand what they want. At the same time, I couldn't stop thinking about this incident. Now I sit while waiting for class to start. Every day really sucks. I felt a number of things that I really hate the most and until now I also can't speak with all of this. I feel there is annoyance as well as regret that has long been rooted in me. I couldn't stop thinking about all that and even to this moment I also don't know how to deal with all of this. I felt another strange thing and this second I also can't deny it. Not long after that, I saw one of the people who had been looking at me with a look that seemed like he wanted to say something. Slowly I approached and invited the person to talk.
"You seem like you have something you want to tell me?" said Julie curiously.
"You are right. I have something to ask you. It's just that I feel uncomfortable asking about it.”
"What do you want to ask about? just say it. You don't have to feel that way. I will answer all of them so don't worry.”
"Are you really okay?"
"Yes. I didn't say that I would answer everything you wanted to ask so just say it casually."
"Okay, if you really feel it's okay. Actually, there have been several rumors going around and they are all about you. I just want to ask if all of that is true?”
"Ah, about that apparently. At first, I also didn't understand why all of that was even spread out. I don't like the rumors at all. It's just that I couldn't just randomly erase all of them and in the end I just let it go.”
“Are you sure you're okay? I think you need someone to talk to."
"Maybe yes, maybe no."
"What?"
“I have heard everything. And I feel that it is indeed a risk from all the work I do. That's why I feel like it's not a big deal so I just let it go I really don't care about it.”
“I see, if that's what you're saying I believe you.”
His words sounded very sincere. I feel that this world might never be on my side. But in reality it all turned out to be just my wild imagination and I really feel ashamed of that. Day after day passed quickly. I'm still the same as before. No changes have occurred and instead only rely on other things. I thought a lot about my next life. My career as a model is almost over and I know this very well. The life I previously lived, now has changed drastically and I can't even handle all of this alone.
'Unlucky. What should I do now?' muttered Julie to herself.
At the same time, some people who previously spread rumors to make Julie scorned by many people, now they are still living a truly unfair life. They look fine and even like there is not the slightest problem in the lives of the three of them. The warm atmosphere made them even more excited and this time it looked like they were somewhere together. They were overjoyed. Not long after, one of them got a phone call and immediately picked up the call, immediately his face changed from very cheerful to surprised.
"What is it?" asked one of the guy's friends.
I feel that now there are only days that are so boring. When everything was almost gone, I also thought that maybe there really wasn't any more time for me. I feel it to the bone. At this moment, my heart keeps pounding as if I feel such a thrilling sensation. I saw one of the posts of someone who said something strange like a new rumor. At that time, I was no longer surprised by all this. One month passed, now everything is not the same anymore. I feel right now is really like life should be. The sun was shining and so was I, who was walking brilliantly to the sound of applause and everyone's admiration. I hope all this will last forever and I really feel happy with this atmosphere. The world is evil but the world will not be evil forever. I kept hoping until all of that actually happened and now there's only happiness left.