Once at home, I immediately rushed into my room and now I see there are lots of piles of papers that I haven't cleaned up before. Looking at the day that was getting late, it made me feel that today was actually really unlucky. There are so many things that make me feel uncomfortable and one of them I keep imagining to this day. I saw myself as if I was useless and only in the shadows of those shining people. Now it's like I'm running away from some other things that I've never expected before. I really feel that in the end all of this is just wasted and won't be of any use in the future. I keep thinking about it until now and there's nothing I can do. To be honest, I just keep feeling that this world is weird and I have to be among that weirdness until I'm so sick of it. Some other things that even now I keep thinking about how to avoid all of this, strangely I feel more and more that all of this is just in vain and there really is no way out. It's been a long time since I've been among this full of thoughts until I really feel disgusted actually and it turns out that it exists even today. Beautiful night. That's what's currently on my mind. I'm getting more and more into it and even feel that this is sometimes quite fun too. I saw a starlight and it was shining brightly. On the other hand I also imagine that for example the star is myself and shines in the sky. It's a feeling I won't be able to forget until I die. Not only that, I also felt happy for a moment but in the end I had to sigh again and feel tired from all this. When I was in the room, suddenly I heard someone calling my name and at that moment I immediately opened the door.
"Who comes at this time of night?" muttered Julie.
Even though I live in this apartment alone, sometimes I never close my bedroom door and even if someone comes to visit, I always hear bells ringing and people calling. When I checked, it was true that it was one of my friends who had come to my apartment on purpose. I slowly opened the door and told him to enter my apartment tonight. This person keeps talking non-stop and even makes me feel curious why keep talking even though I haven't asked him anything at all.
“Sit here and make yourself at home,” I said to Marie.
"Wow, you live here alone?"
"Yes. Why?"
"I can't believe you live here alone. By the way, aren't you scared if something happens to you?”
"No. Why also should be afraid. Just call the emergency number, they will come here to save me.”
"This is you."
“By the way, were you just from somewhere?”
"Correct. Many of my friends happened to invite me out to eat and drink. They are always like that even though I'm really lazy when I have to talk about nonsense like that."
"Nonsense?"
"Yes. some kind of discussion that leads to the annoying thing in my life.”
Even though I really don't know what they were talking about there, if you look at Marie's annoyed expression on her face, it's clear that maybe nothing is fun. So far, I also often avoid some people who are annoying and will only waste energy when I'm with them. I felt that way and now I'm not at all happy about it. Not only that, I saw many other things that I had not remembered for a long time. There's also a lot I've forgotten so far simply because there are other things that are even more enjoyable than that. Since then I don't know what to do after seeing all that and I feel something is wrong with this. At that moment I couldn't stop thinking and that's what I don't even know why. Marie kept talking about herself who was feeling uncomfortable. There were several reasons that seemed like he didn't want to be told and only said a few things that really made me laugh when I heard his words. I also feel very happy because now I can forget something that previously made me feel dizzy and I don't know how to deal with it anymore.
"You don't have a photoshoot scheduled?" she asked.
"No. I guess I'll have to wait some more."
“What are you waiting for? Aren't you clearly under that agency and you're going to get a lot of your modeling work schedule."
“Hey, to be honest working in the entertainment world is not as busy as people think. There is a lot of free time which is almost too much and also confused about what to do besides going to campus and studying.”
“You might be able to use that free time for a vacation or just practice.”
"Yes. you are right. It's just that practice time also has times on certain days so I can't just go around.”
"I think you're taking too much vacation."
"What do you mean?"
“Maybe you're bored and really want to work. I already knew you would. But what about Alona?"
"Hah? Why are you asking me about that person?”
"It doesn't matter. I just want to ask because you happen to be in the same agency as that person right?”
“Ah, you're right. But I rarely met him at the agency.”
"Is it true? So where did you meet him?"
"Outside. I sometimes run into him at restaurants or something.”
"So apparently, it was not easy."
"Are you a fan?"
"What? ah, not really. I only know him from social media.”
"Yes, I admit that person is famous."
Of all the people who ask, there are only a few things I do share and the rest I don't have to do. I feel that there is actually something wrong with all of this and indeed that is what I have often thought. Marie had apparently ordered the chicken and now we are enjoying it while continuing to talk about many other things. I've been wanting to relax like this for a long time and now it's happening I'm honestly so happy. Not long after that, I heard my cell phone ring and when I opened it it was a message from someone I didn't know. The message contains something that currently makes me feel both surprised and confused by it.
'What is this?' muttered Julie to herself.