There’s nothing wrong with this right? There will be no bad things that might happen because I am not expecting anything right? I am just happy.
My day went very well. We finished one project that we will present to our boss next week. I am confident with it because we did our best and effort in it.
I took a taxi to go home, I don’t have any other plans for today. Luckily there’s no traffic on the way to my apartment so it didn’t take long to get home.
I saw Xavier waiting for me when I went off the taxi.
“I didn’t know you’re here,” I said. I put my things on the side cabinet and turned to him to kiss his cheeks.
He didn’t say anything and just sat on the couch, I sat beside him.
“Are you okay?” I asked silently and tried to touch his shoulder but he stood up.
“I just waited for you to come home, I thought something happened to you. I’m leaving now,” he said straight.
“What do you mean?” I asked a bit confused.
What the hell is your problem?
He laughed sarcastically, “So you didn’t even checked your phone last night? Or you’re acting this way because I didn’t make it last night?” he said very irritated.
“Sorry. I forgot to check,” I said after I scrolled my phone and saw his messages and missed calls.
“Yeah right. You seems very busy,” he said that made my heart hurt.
“I just thought you were busy. I don’t want to bother you,” I whispered.
The happiness that I had since last night suddenly vanished. I remembered the disappointment after he failed to text me that he couldn't make it to our date and how he choose to just send Lucas off to me. I remembered the embarrassment that I had for myself knowing that I expect too much again. And how I comforted myself that at least I get a chance to still enjoy the night even without him. Now seeing him like this, it made me feel mix emotions. I am hurt, disappointed and confused.
“So you didn't checked your phone?” he asked irritated.
“I haven't. I forgot to check on it, I didn't thought you would text me.”
“You're doing this on purpose aren't you?”
“I didn't. What the hell is wrong with you Xav?” I said irritated too.
How can be like this? It's not like I am doing all this just to get back at him. I can't believe he thinks that way.
“I thought you said you understand my schedule?” he said it as if I am being unreasonable to him.
“Yes. Why? Did you hear me complaining?” I asked a bit sarcastic because of my irritation.
He looked at me more irritated, I looked at him too.
Between the two of us, he’s the one who’s always busy.
Now he’s mad that I haven’t texted him back or answered any of his calls? I didn’t even did that on purpose.
“Are you blaming me, Veronica?” he asked very controlled.
My heart feel like it was being held that I couldn’t breathe properly. I can see the anger in his eyes.
“I am not blaming you. I was just saying that I thought you were busy and I don’t want to bother you. You have so much important to do and I don’t want to be a burden to you,” I said without feeling anything. It was as if my heart is numb and I can’t feel anything.
“Don’t twist the issue, Veronica. I am mad because you seems to forget to inform me about your whereabouts. Don’t you know that I am worried about you?” he shouted at me. I almost jump because of his very angry voice, “You didn’t even texted me! I thought something bad happened to you!” 
My tears started to form at the side of my eyes. My heart feels heavy and my chest feels tight. I don’t know why instead of being happy to know that he’s worried about me, I feel so hurt. I don’t know why but this time, the pain matters more. No the thought that he somehow cares about me or anything else.
“I didn’t even know if Lucas really did fetch you up last night. He came back too late, I am so worried about you!” he still sounds mad. “I shouldn’t rely on that person!”
“He did,” I said because I felt like he shouldn’t be doubting Lucas.
“Are you two close? Don’t tell me you’re with him until late night yesterday? Is that why he came back too late?” he asked as if accusing us that we did something wrong. He even looked at me very disappointed.
“You let him fetch me right? You can’t make it there so you talked to him to go fetch me instead,” I said plainly and was about to leave him there but he pulled me back and faced me to him.
“Stop, Xavier. It hurts,” I told him as I felt his strong hold on me. He didn’t stop so I tried to push him away but he’s stronger than me.
“Now you’re defending that guys?” he asked again still irritated. He acts like he couldn’t believe of what I said. He was also looking at me as if we did something wrong that made me push my limit.
“Can you just let me go? And stop looking at me like I did something wrong. We didn’t do anything! If you were there yesterday then I won’t be with him in the first place!” I shouted at him.
I can’t believe this! How can he act like that? He knows how much I like him to the point that I am still here holding on to us even though I know he loves someone else. And here he is, acting like he was accusing me of something that I can’t even do!
It pissed him more, “Now, it’s my fault? I asked him to fetch you to make sure that you are safe. I didn’t meant for you two to go out on a date! I am just thinking about your safety and now it seems to be my fault? If he just did what I told him to do then you might be able to answer my texts and calls.”
I shook my head in him. It was as if my heart is pounding so hard that it hurts but it didn’t stop me from voicing out what I feel. Since we were here now fighting over it, might as well I tell him what I truly feel. Because it hurt so bad knowing he doesn’t know that he was hurting me constantly.