“Hi, Ari!”
A message request from Raven suddenly pop on my screen, startling me.
I only stared at the message with boredom as I moved it to Spam. There all his messages will be ignored and that will satisfy me. He won't be able to send me a message anymore. He also sent me a friend request, but I deleted it.
I took out my phone as I walked along the hallway. Other students were told to stay outside the gate because they forgot to bring their ID's again. Thank goodness my memory is still functioning, though I forgot some important stuffs sometimes.
"Ari!" I heard a voice calling me from a distance. At first, I thought it was Shaine, so I halted from walking to pay attention to that someone who is currently calling my name.
To my surprise, I saw Raven running toward me. Even from a far, his smile is still visible on his lips, like he never got tired of smiling. I can feel that he's a jolly type because he always seems energetic.
“Wait for me!” he screamed while waving his right hand, telling me to stay still. I only rolled my eyes as I continued walking. I made my steps twice faster than the usual. “Hey, Ari!”
“Just ignore the monkey,” I said to myself, and walked faster. Annoying! I haven't reached the school building yet.
Look, it's really the bad luck of my day today. I'm safe from receiving messages from him because his account has been moved to spam, but I won't be able to survive when I come here to school.
“Gotcha!” I was stopped from walking when he held me in my wrist. No matter how fast I walked, he is still good at running.
“You're such a bad girl, Ari. You really made me tired of running,”he said, still catching his breath. I was shocked when I saw him smile. It was as if his lip was about to tear to its extreme extent.
“Just to tell you something that you already know, I didn't beg for you to run. I even ignored you, so you can see that I'm in a hurry and I don't usually entertain a stranger who calls my name while I'm walking.” I faced him with my brows arching.
“Well, it's okay if you didn't beg for me to run. Even if you won't beg me, I still want you to be my friend. So don't ever say that you didn't ask for any attention because I'm gonna give it to you without you begging for it,” he said, smiling. He's busy wiping the sweats on his face, but he still managed to look at my eyes.
“Let me ask you a question, Raven.” My eyes rolled at him, but he only reciprocated it with his usual smile.
“Sure! I won't mind you asking.”
“What did I feed to you, and why are your face so thick to talk to me? Just to remind you, we're not close. You appeared yesterday without informing me.”
“You feed me with your beauty, that's why my face's so thick to talk to you. And why didn't I inform you about yesterday? Because it was supposed to be a surprise! I can't afford to spill the bean, you know,” he chuckled. “C'mon, Ari! We may not be close, but I'm really interested in you.” He then held my shoulders.
“Get your filthy hands off me!” I slapped his hands away as he showed a shock face.
“Chill!” he laughed.
“Don't make fun of me, stupid!” I attempted to walk away, but he quickly held my wrist again for the second time around. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Then let me go!” I yelled irritably.
“Why do you look so gorgeous when you're mad, Ari?”
Seriously, is he joking right now?
“Don't throw a stupid joke on me! I said, let me go!”
“Fine.” He let go of his hand as he raised the both of them, showing defeat. “Bye, Ari! Have a great day ahead!” Before he disappeared from my sight, he first showed me his smile. I only rolled my eyes as he waved his hands.
That was stupid. I swear, I hate this day.
* * * *
“Love it!” someone commented with great appreciation.
I couldn't help but peek inside when suddenly the loud shouts of the students rang out. Others were applauding, while some of them were thrilled.
That moment I chose to take a look on the scenario makes me regret for doing it. Because after I have seen what I was curious about, my heart started to feel the pain again.
I froze in my direction as I clearly witnessed how Shan kissed Marga's cheeks. He was holding a guitar on his left hand, while I noticed a bouquet on his other hand. The people inside the room celebrated their happiness and showing their support for the couple, while I was secretly breaking here. As I witnessed the sweet yet painful scene for me, I realized I have listened to the wrong song.
I shook my head. Only myself can hear my chuckles as I hold back my tears from falling. Eff you, self. Why so affected? Go fix your brain! This is not what you deserved! Why can't you just leave this place?
But my attempt to run away was interrupted when I saw Shan walking toward my direction. He asked his classmate to hold his guitar as he approached me with a smile. It was late for me to go away.
“Ari!” he cheerfully said as he offered me to go inside.
“No need, Shan. I was just carried away by the song. But I'm leaving already. Yes, that's right! I have to leave now,” I replied, trying to fight my emotions. It's a good thing that Marga was left inside. I might not be able to stop the pain when the two of them are in front of me.
“Are you sure?”
“Of course!” I forced a smile. It's hard to control your emotions, specially holding your tears back. It's like you're avoiding the inevitable.
I couldn't wait for Shan to speak again, and I left immediately. I quickened my pace as the tears that had been forming at the corners of my eyes kept pouring out. The pain is real! Until now, my heart still cannot accept that I am not the one he loves. Very painful!
“Ari.” I almost jumped in panic when suddenly someone spoke behind me. I wiped my eyes first before I turned around.
“Are you following me?” From being teary, my eyes now is burning in irritation as I stood face to face with him.
“What if I said no?” As usual, he will never miss a second to show his smile.
“What, is that a joke?! C'mon, don't be such a liar. Admit that you are following me, stalker!”
He heaved a deep sigh. “Fine. I'm following you.”
“See that? You're so annoying!”
“I'm sorry, Ari.” Suddenly, the expression on his face changed. From being jolly, it turned out to be sad. The sweet smile on his lips briefly disappeared as her eyes remained focused on me.
“Then now you're apologizing to me? What did you eat?” I asked irritably.
“I'm sorry for your pain. I know how it feels to be someone like you, and I know exactly how painful it is. However, I'm just here if you need someone to listen to you. Now I fully understand why it's hard for you to entertain other guys in your life. Sorry, if you have to undergo this kind of heartbreak.”
My eyes widened as I stared at him. Of all the people in my life, I didn't even think he would say that to me. Raven, a total stranger to me, talking about my pain, is kinda weird.
“How could you say that?” As I stared into his eyes, it was as if I could see the pain in them as well. But it wasn't obvious anymore because he was always smiling.
“Ari, you don't have to hide your true feelings. The more you hide it, the more painful it becomes. You don't have to pretend and act like everything's fine because many people are much willing to listen to you. Always remember that you're special, and you are worth it to be loved.”
My eyes only blinked. This is probably just the very first in my life that I heard something like that from a guy. And I wasn't really expecting to hear it from Raven, whom I thought to have no idea about love. His words hit different today, making me speechless. I ran out of words to say.
“Love sometimes can be so cruel to us, Ari. We can't avoid being hurt once we chose to love rather than to let go. There is always a consequence for choosing someone who will never love you back,” he said, smiling.