“I don’t want to move on,” I whisper, clutching at his sleeve.
He pulls away, turning around and leaving the room without another word.
I curl up in bed and let the tears come, finally giving into my heartache. I don’t deserve him, I never did. I wish I was stronger, I wish I could be more for him. I wish so badly that things could be different.
But they can’t.
I am what I am, and he is who he is.
We are doomed.
It takes a few weeks for me to feel better, but I’m still not the same. I still hurt everywhere. My scars are still healing and the incisions are still tender.
But I’ve been trying my best to recover on my own. I haven’t been asking Giorgio to do things for me anymore. I don’t want him to have to touch me anymore.
I’m in the kitchen cooking dinner when the doorbell rings.
I wipe my hands off on a towel and then walk to the door.
When I open it, my ex stands in front of me.
“What are you doing here?” I ask him, shaking.
He smiles. “I heard about what happened between you and Giorgio.”
He pauses, waiting for my reaction. “You’re available?”
I shake my head. “No.” I go to close the door but he stops me.
“I think you might have misheard me, Allie,” he snarls.
“I didn’t,” I whisper. I go to push the door again, but he’s stronger.
He pushes it back and then comes inside, closing the door behind him.
He grabs my arm and then twists it behind me. “I think you’re a dumb bitch,” he growls.
“Let me go,” I whisper.
He throws me to the ground and then looks down at me. “You made a mistake when you left me the first time,” he says.
“I didn’t leave you,” I whisper, tears running down my face. “You left me.”
“That’s not what happened and you know it,” he snarls, leaning down and grabbing my neck. “I didn’t leave you. I was kicked out of the hospital room because you were with another man.”
I shake my head, trying to dislodge his hand from my neck. “No,” I choke.
“Yes,” he hisses. “Now, we’re going to get to know each other real good.”
He leans down and presses his forehead to mine, his eyes glinting. His fingers tighten around my neck and I cry out, trying to kick him off. He straddles me, pressing down on my chest.
“I’ve been waiting to do this for so long,” he whispers.
I scream when he presses my chest harder and then hear a thud. My ex drops and rolls off of me, groaning.
Giorgio stands over me, his fists clenched. “Are you okay?” he growls.
“Yes,” I whisper. My ex stirs on the ground, rolling over and sitting up.
“Oh my Goodness,” he snarls. He scrambles up to his feet, glaring at Giorgio.
“I’m going to kill you,” he snaps.
“Stay away,” Giorgio snaps back. “You touch her again, I’ll kill you first.”
My ex glares at me and then turns, storming out.
Giorgio bends down and picks me up, cradling me in his arms. He carries me to the sofa and sits with me, pulling me to his chest.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
“He was hurting you,” Giorgio answers, his voice hoarse. “He wasn’t going to touch you again.”
I nod and snuggle in closer, holding his arms tighter. Giorgio hesitates for a moment and then wraps his arms around me, holding me close.
“I thought I’d lost you,” he whispers. He holds me even tighter, his fingers digging into my back.
“I thought the same,” I whisper back, tears falling down my cheeks.
“You’re not allowed to say that anymore,” Giorgio says, holding me tighter. “You are mine. You’re my mate. I am not going to leave you.”
“I was scared,” I whisper.
“I was too,” he growls.
We both sit in silence for a moment, holding each other. Then Giorgio pushes my hair back. “You need to promise me something,” he says.
I pull back and look at him, wiping tears from my eyes. “Anything.”
“You have to promise me that you will never say those things again,” he growls. “If you don’t, then I’ll leave you.”
I swallow, his words making me feel like I’m dying.
I want to say the words, but my voice has left me.
I open my mouth and then shut it again, unable to speak.
“Say it,” Giorgio orders. “You have to say it now.”
“I can’t,” I whisper.
Giorgio drops me from his arms and stands. I stare at him in disbelief as he walks away without another word. I curl up on the sofa and let my tears fall, my heart breaking even more.
I thought we were over this, but we are not. He wants something I cannot give him.
The next morning, Giorgio brings me breakfast and sets it on the bedside table. “Eat,” he orders, looking at me.
I do as he says, trying to ignore the ache in my chest.
I want to ask him where he’s been, but I don’t want to know the answer. I already know what it is.
I know he’s been with someone else. I can feel it. I can smell her on his skin, I can feel her in his kiss when he kissed me last night.
I eat as much of my food as I can and then put it back on the tray. “Thank you,” I whisper, looking down.
“Eat the rest,” Giorgio orders.
I shake my head, my stomach churning. “I can’t.”
He picks up my bowl of oatmeal and brings it to me, pushing it under my nose. “You’re going to eat all of this, or I’ll force you to do it.”
I shake my head again and he growls, picking up the spoon and bringing it to my lips. I keep my lips pressed together and he smacks my hand.