Chapter 12
“In a week, you’ll be out of this hospital room. Just keep on going to therapy and take your prescriptions regularly, Ms. Suarez.”
“Thanks, Doc.” I smiled happily. My recovery is going very well and I’m very happy to hear the news that I’m gonna be out of this hospital soon.
Jeanny has been giving me her notes from the lectures in the university. I will also be given special classes for the lectures that I’ve missed because of my injury.
I lied down on the bed again. I can’t believe that a month flew by so fast and how rapid the changes were in my life. Just a few months ago, I was still in my hometown packing my things. Now, I’m in a hospital bed on the way to recovery.
I didn’t tell my family immediately about what happened. I only told them a week ago, when I knew that I was feeling better. I don’t want to worry them and make them spend money to visit me, when they can use that to spend for their needs. My mom cried and she was so eager to visit me, but Anna assured her that I’m fine. They talked and they seem to get along which is so relieving because Anna has been a great mother figure to me here.
“Is Jace visiting you again tonight?” Chase asks.
“I think so.” I replied. Jace has been visiting me every night for a week now. Sometimes he brings food and games. Sometimes we just talk or he and Chase talk. He said that he’s on a break from his other part-time job, therefore he’s got more time. I’m glad he visits me frequently because he has been a great friend to me and I miss him a lot. Jeanny and Miss Davis too.
“Are you done eating breakfast?” He asked. I nodded. “Okay, let’s go.”
Chase and I went to the rooftop garden like we usually do. We sat on our usual spot and tried to breathe in the fresh air. Silence enveloped the two of us.
I looked at Chase and seemed far away today. It’s as if his mind is not here but somewhere else.
“How are you?” I asked. Chase opened his eyes and looked at me. He looked at me with tired eyes. I stared at his eyes for a while before he avoided my gaze and looked somewhere else.
“Chase,” I called him. “Are you okay?” I asked more worriedly after seeing the look on his face, but he didn’t say anything.
I sighed. “You always make sure that I’m okay. You always remind me to drink my medicine, and you’ve been constantly visiting me. I’m grateful, really. But sometimes I wonder if you’re okay.”
We’re humans. We are capable of helping and taking care of other people out of our human nature, but we can also get tired. And sometimes when we experience burnout, we can also be capable of masking our true emotions so we can continue to take care of other people. Although sometimes, it is the only way we know how to cope up with the overwhelming feeling of being tired.
“Is my presence bothering you?” Chase asked. I was taken aback with his question.
“No.” I immediately answered. Is he thinking that I am not grateful for his presence and his help? “I appreciate your efforts to help me, Chase. But it doesn’t take much for me to realize that you need help too.”
“They talked to you, didn’t they?”
“Even if they didn’t, I already noticed how off you were the past week. We’re not that close, Chase, but it’s true that I’m worried about you.”
Chase looked at me, and I saw a glint of surprise in his eyes, then it returned to being sad and he looked away. He didn’t say anything, and I’m guessing that he wants to be left alone, and I’m not one to push.
Ethan and Rafael visited me yesterday. Chase arrived around lunch time and the two went here very early in the morning so they didn’t meet.
I just finished eating breakfast when they came. I was startled by their visit and I even thought that Chase was with them.
“Hey, Eunice.” Ethan greeted me.
“Hi.” I replied. Rafael just smiled at me.
“How are you?” Ethan asked.
“Getting better. Hopefully, I’ll be out of here soon.”
“That’s great to hear.” Rafael said.
Ethan sat down on the couch and Rafael followed him. It’s awkward having the two of them here because I’ve never really conversed with the two. Both of them seems reserved so its really hard to get to know them well. Not that I plan to. It would have been better if Chase was here.
A few more minutes passed and I cannot take it anymore so I spoke. Both of them were avoiding my gaze and it seems like they’re hiding something from me. It makes me feel weird, it’s bothersome.
“Is there anything you need?” I asked politely.
The two of them looked at each other. Ethan sighed.
“About Jonathan…” Rafael spoke.
I frowned. “What about him?”
“Is he always here?” Ethan answered with another question.
I don’t know why they’re asking me this. Do they not know the whereabouts of their member?
“Uh yeah. He visits me everyday.”
Both of them looked at each other again, which makes me think that something strange is happening.
“Why? Is something wrong? Did something happen?” I asked. The thought of something bad happening to him is gut-wrenching. We’re not extremely close but I don’t want anything bad happening to the people around me.
“Well, Jonathan has been… kind of avoiding us.” Rafael replied, quite unsure if it’s okay to share something like that with a stranger like me.
“How? You guys live together.”
“He’s on hiatus but his schedules in the company for training and practices aren’t put on hold. He’s supposed to join us for the last concert but he suddenly backed out. Jonathan’s not like that, you know. He is always considerate. He loves the stage. It kills him when can’t perform due to an injury so we couldn’t understand why. Ever since the accident he’s been…” Rafael trailed off.
“Distant.” Ethan continued for him. “We ask him if he’s okay, and he always says that he is, but I don’t believe him. I’ve been with him since he was fourteen, I know how he thinks. He thinks he’s a burden so he tries to avoid us.”
I tried to take in everything that they said.
“But how do I.. fit into this?”
They looked at each other again.
“Can you stop looking at each other, please? You’re making me nervous and uneasy.”
“Sorry.” Ethan apologized.
“We were wondering where he was spending his time for the past weeks, and it turns out that he’s spending it with you.” Rafael explained.
Spending it with me?
“Oops that came out wrong.” Rafael said seeing how flustered I became.
“What Rafael meant was that Jonathan has been spending a lot of time here, and don’t get us wrong, it’s totally fine that he’s here. It’s actually better that he’s here than going somewhere else.” Ethan tried to explain.
“I still don’t see what it has to do with me.”
“Eunice, did you notice anything weird about him? Or maybe he’s distant or something.”
I tried to think. Of course he’s distant because we’re not that close, unlike how he is with his band members.
“I guess he seems indifferent to his surroundings. Whenever news about you guys comes out on the television, he acts nonchalantly. When our topic is going towards his career, he changes it. It’s as if… he pretends that part of him doesn’t exist when he’s here.” I answered.
We all fell silent.
Rafael and Ethan bid their goodbyes. They didn’t tell me anything more or asked me to talk to Chase. It was out of worry that I asked Chase how he was feeling.
“I’m sorry, Chase. I didn’t mean to invade your privacy. I’ll go down first. You can stay here.” I took my crutches and stood up.
“Ciara.” I felt a hand on my arm and saw Chase holding onto me. I was surprised when he called me. “Stay.” He said softly.
I sat down again, with his hand still holding onto my arm.