Shahrukh and Pooja arrived at Red Chillies office as the day is getting dark. They are in talks for a film project. This is one of Shahrukh's ambitious film projects which will start the production by the end of this year. Of course this required Shahrukh's full attention but the man seemed to have lost himself. Several times Pooja had to nudge him in the arm whenever he was lost in thought. He couldn't focus on the meeting. His mind is always fixed on one person. Kajol.
As a result, they had to end the meeting early. Everyone starts leaving the room as Pooja complaints to Shahrukh.
"What's wrong with you? You've been daydreaming lately. This is your dream project, right? You should be more aware of the opportunity you almost missed." Pooja said.
Shahrukh twirled the pen in his hand staring at it blankly. He just kept silent, letting Pooja grumbling next to him. She is right. It is his dream project. He was very enthusiastic when he was offered to join in the film. But why had he lost the enthusiasm now? Where did the ambitious Shahrukh go?
Pooja rolls her eyes in annoyance. Her boss just stays silent. She sighed heavily then chose to be busy with her phone, checking Shahrukh's schedule for tomorrow.
"Tomorrow is your wedding anniversary. You're free. What are your plans for that?"
Your wedding anniversary.
Shahrukh immediately woke up from his daydream and looked at Pooja. "What did you say?"
Pooja shows her phone screen. Of the many numbers on the calendar, his eyes immediately fell on one number marked by Pooja. His lips curled into a bitter smile. His wedding anniversary? Which marriage? The marriage which he unknowingly destroyed with his selfishness? Or, is it still worthy to be called a marriage?
"I don't know. No plans whatsoever." Shahrukh replied.
Pooja frowned. "How strange. Usually you've been busy preparing for it a week before the day. Which demon is possessing you this time, huh?"
Shahrukh groaned in frustration. "What should I plan, Pooja? She's gone."
"You mean?" Pooja puts her phone on the table and looks at Shahrukh. The man just leaned back in his chair, rubbing his face.
"She left the house. I don't know when or where she went. I don't even know where to look for her. She–"
"Wait, wait." Pooja interrupt the conversation. "Two days ago I saw your Mercedes parked in front of your The Mukerji's house. That wasn't you?"
Shahrukh shook his head and was silent for a while. It must be Aryan. But why did he come there?
He realized something. He hastily got up from his chair while clearing his files from the table. "I must go home."
"But you have another meeting with–"
"Cancel it. Reschedule it to another day. You can go home now too." Once everything was clear, he immediately left the room. He had to ask his son something. Pooja could only shake her head and walk outside the room.
Shahrukh immediately looked for Aryan as soon as he got home. He asked everyone in his house where the boy was. He couldn't contain his curiosity.
He opened the door of a large room on the top floor of his house. Aryan was there, busy with his Xbox game.
"Hey. Why haven't you slept yet?"
Aryan turned to look at his father before turning back to his game. "I'm on holiday but no one from this family wants to spend time with me."
Shahrukh smiled slightly hearing that. "Sorry. I'm very busy until the end of this month."
"Yeah. You've always been like that, hai na papa?" Aryan said with a crooked smile.
Shahrukh was silent. He took a can of drink and sat down next to his son. They just stared at the game for a while without saying anything.
"Is there something you want to tell me today?" Shahrukh asked.
As if knowing what his father meant, Aryan immediately nodded. "I went to see Maa."
Shahrukh held his breath as his heart beat accelerated. His guess was right. But how can that be? How did he know where Kajol was right now?
"Oh yeah? When? Where did you meet her? Did you talk to her much? Is she all right?"
Aryan paused his game then shifted his body to look at his father. "She refused to talk to me. I asked her why, what happened. She just said it was a long story and she couldn't tell me now. She also said Grandma wouldn't like to see me there."
Shahrukh was total shocked. His chest was like being hit by a big rock. He couldn't believe Kajol and her family treated his son that bad. As far as he knew they had a very good relationship. But why is it like this now?
"How could they do that to you? You know they love you more than anyone do."
Aryan shook his head. "I should be the one asking you, pa. What have you done to Maa so they hate me too? I don't know anything. I don't know when, why, and how Maa left the house. But I was hated too. Why? Because I'm your son? Because I'm a part of you?"
"Aryan..."
"I asked you to explain. You refused. Then I asked Maa to explain. She also refused. Even Bua doesn't know what's going on in this house. Why is everyone suddenly ignoring me? Don't I have the right to know? Or at least tell me if I can still call her Maa or not." Aryan took a deep breath.
Shahrukh clicked his tongue. "Let this be your parents' business, son. We'll sort it out soon. That's for sure. But I don't know when."
"You never tried to solve it. You never looked for her. You just let her go. You forget her easily But I can't be like that. I can't stay still even though I don't know the truth. She is my mother. I have to bring her back. And see what I receive."
Aryan looked at his father sadly. He was angry. Sad. Disappointed. But he couldn't do anything. He is just a child. People say the fate of a family is determined by parents. When the family is on the verge of breaking up and the parents can't control themselves, the child is the first target who will get the sap. Not parents.
He turned off the screen and ended the game. "Whatever you did, you messed things up, papa. I'm disappointed in you." He got up from the sofa and walked towards the door, leaving his father alone.
**
'I am a wanderer, going from one place to another without having a single final destination. Whenever I visit a place I pray may it will be my home. But it's not that easy. God wants me to keep looking. So I kept looking, not knowing what His plans for me.
A few years later, I realized that Kajol was the one. She's what I've been looking for all along. God didn't bring us together, God wanted me to find her. And I'm so happy because I found her at the right time. I just hope that she will always want to be my home. Please don't laugh, I'm being serious.'
Kajol, who had been holding back her laughter for so long, now laughed out loud. She wasn't used to hearing Shahrukh say such sweet words outside their film sets. Currently they are in the mandap and have just finished the wedding rituals. Shahrukh hold her hands very tightly as he looked at her with that gaze, that shady look that always managed to make her knees weak. Thousands of butterflies flying on her stomach, making her unable to hold back her laughter anymore.
Their whole family laughed with her. That moment, which initially felt sacred, turned warm. Shahrukh was the only person who didn't laugh. He was busy hiding his blushing face. He was so shy.
'Could you shut up so I can finish this?' Shahrukh asked in a whisper.
Kajol nodded as she tried to control herself. 'Sorry, sorry.'
Shahrukh cleared his throat. He waited until it was quiet again before he continued.
'Kajol Mukerji, my best friend, who is now my queen, thank you for wanting to be my home. Thank you for giving this wanderer a home. This journey will not be easy but I know, with you, we can get through it all.
No matter what happens, I will only trust you.
Whatever people say about you, even if it's bad, I will still believe in what I believe about you.
Whoever hurt you, I will bear your pain
I will be your strength. Will be your happiness. Will be your laugh. Forever.
I love you, love you very much, now and forever. And always will be.'
Shahrukh kissed her forehead gently. This time Kajol didn't laugh. She was touched by every word Shahrukh spoke to her. Happiness welled up in her heart and made her eyes tear up.
'Can I kiss you?'
Shahrukh lifted his eyebrows in shock. 'Here?'
Kajol nodded. They seemed hesitant about it. But without waiting long they brought their faces closer to each other and then brought their lips together. All the guests whistled and clapped for the couple. The surroundings became very noisy. Of course, with happiness.
Shahrukh smiled at the memory and flipped the pages of the photo album in his hand. His wedding photo album is full of unforgettable memories. It only happens once in a lifetime. He was never that happy. He longed for days like that, where he only felt happiness overflowing. His gaze fell on a cute photo in the corner of a page. There was Kajol's handwriting below it.
New Delhi, June 14th 2002.
Today, tomorrow and forever.
On the other hand, Kajol also remembers that day. She pondered in her room. Her phone has been vibrating ever since and showing the same notification, congratulations from his friends and fans. She ignored it all. She didn't want to make her separation from Shahrukh any more difficult. Every time she saw his face, her heart's defenses always crumbled. Their story has been written for too long. It was too difficult for her to erase everything.
She got out of bed and stood in front of a large mirror. She watched herself. Her belly is growing bigger. She took a deep breath as she rubbed it. She imagines how her baby must be born without his father's presence. Shahrukh knew nothing about her pregnancy. She asked everyone close to her to hide it from him. For now, she just wants to focus on her pregnancy. She didn't want to lose the baby again for any reason.
Shahrukh looked at the row of photos in the album sadly. He missed Kajol. He thought he could live his life without her but he couldn't. He needs her in every inch of his life. He needs Kajol. He had to find her. He had to bring her back no matter what. He sighed, releasing the tightness in his chest.
Kajol turned her gaze out the window, staring at the moon in the night sky. Silence began to embrace her. The following days of her life would be even harder. But she had to face it all. Alone.
"Happy anniversary, Shahrukh."
"Happy anniversary, Kajol."
~ TO BE CONTINUED ~