Kajol didn't do much while at her parents house. Her mother told her to not doing many activities during her pregnancy. For her who likes activities it is very torturous. She couldn't sit still while people were busy with their work. So her mother only allowed her to do light work like what she is currently doing, gardening. She often gardens with Tanisha. Her sister has a small garden behind the house. They spent a lot of time there talking about many things. It distracts her a from her life problems.
But today seems to be different.
"Didi, do you remember what date it is today?"
Kajol sighed while looking at Tanisha lazily. Of course she remembered. Everyone celebrates the day happily, except her and Shahrukh. The memory of this day kept her awake all night, filled with thoughts she didn't even know what are they. She just felt empty. She wasn't sad but wasn't happy either. People just see her being happy. She was still smiling and laughing like before.
But they forgot that she is the achiever of the most Filmfare best actress awards. And no one can guarantee if an actor only does the acting in front of the screen or in real life as well. Despite it all, Kajol considers it a blessing. She doesn't need to explain to everyone how she feels just by showing her other face.
Tanisha smiled teasingly while raising her eyebrows. "June 14th. Your 14th wedding anniversary. What's the best thing you remember about today?"
"Can we not discuss that?" Kajol asked. She glanced at Tanisha briefly before getting busy with the plants and watering them.
"You know what? People say we can heal a pain just by sharing it to others. Maybe you can try that too."
Kajol turned. "Marriage is not a pain, Tichie."
"Not supposed to be. But you experience it, didi."
"I've said before that I don't want to talk about this anymore. That's enough."
Tanisha shook her head with a sigh. She still remembered when Kajol came that night. With tears in her eyes she stood at the door, alone, with no one accompanying. Her arrival took everyone in the house by surprise. Especially when she told them everything. No one ever thought that the happiness of her marriage was only a mask of the destruction within it.
"Okay, we won't talk about that." Tanisha said after a moment of silence. "What about your baby shower? What's your plan for it?"
"I've decided I'll have it here. In my birthday." Kajol replied.
"Here? You didn't want to have it here initially?" Tanisha said with a frown.
Kajol shrugged. "Yeah, you know why. Paparazzi, media, Shahrukh..."
Tanisha chuckled hearing that. "Oh, so now you want him to come?"
Kajol rolled her eyes in annoyance. "To hell with him. I don't care anymore. This is very important to me and I think I should do it here. With my family. Nothing to do with him."
"But the child you are carrying is his."
"Shut up!" Kajol glared at Tanisha while pinching her arm. Tanisha just laughed.
Their attention was distracted by a noise. It sounded faint but quite disturbing. From where they were now they could hear the repeated honking of car horns and someone screaming.
"God... Can't they give me some peace?" Kajol complained.
"I'll check it out." Tanisha put down her gardening tools and hurried off. Kajol did the same and followed her behind.
**
"Sir, the guards won't let us in." Gani said while looking at his master from the rearview mirror.
Shahrukh, in a frenzy mood, clicked his tongue in annoyance. He is very frustrated. There was only one person in his mind now. He then looked around. Several paparazzi and journalists with their cameras started swarming his car and throwing questions at him.
He didn't think about anything else. He couldn't wait. He opened his car door carelessly and got out. The paparazzi kept asking him questions but he just kept quiet. While Ravi was taking care of the media, he approached two house guards who blocked his car.
"Forgive us, sir. This is a direct order from madam. You cannot enter." said one of the guards.
Shahrukh takes off his glasses roughly. "This is my in-laws house. Tell Tanuja Maa I'm here."
"You cannot, sir. You'd better leave before more media arrives." The guard pointed at the crowd of media behind him.
"Then let me in. You're wasting my time." Shahrukh said curtly and passed the two guards. But after only a few steps they immediately stopped him.
Shahrukh couldn't hold himself. His anger peaked. His clenched fist immediately landed on the guard's jaw, causing him to fall straight down. The situation became more tense. The media certainly didn't miss the incident. They managed to capture Shahrukh's rude behavior with their camera.
At the same time, the owner of the house came out. She was surprised to see her house guards had fallen on the ground. Her eyes immediately fell on Shahrukh.
"What are you doing here? Get out of here!" Tanuja scolds Shahrukh. He immediately approached her and bowed to ask for her blessing. But instead she stepped back, avoiding him.
Shahrukh stood up straight again. Tanuja stares at him intently, making his heart beat even faster. "Maa, please forgive me. I want to meet Kajol. I'm taking her home."
Tanuja squeaks. "Take her home? This is her home. No one can take her anywhere."
"Maa-"
"Stop calling me that!"
Shahrukh's taken aback. His breath caught in his throat. "She is here, right? I beg you please let me in and talk to her."
Tanuja shakes her head. "You come to look for her after months and you think she's still here? How naive."
"I'm sure she's still here. Please, let me see her." Shahrukh passes Tanuja but the lady pushes him hard. The two guards immediately restrained him and forced him back into his car. The crowd of the continues to grow. They were getting noisier, forcing to get a closer look as things heated up.
Meanwhile Shahrukh didn't give up. He struggled and kept screaming. "She's here. I know that. Kajol! I'm coming, Kajol! Let's go home!" he said aloud.
"Your efforts are in vain. Get out of here! Don't make a scene in my house!" Tanuja calls her other employees. They came and helped the guards get Shahrukh out of there.
Shahrukh shook his head vigorously. No matter how many people hold him he will not give up. He only thought of Kajol. He couldn't go back anymore. "I'm not leaving until I see her. Kajol! Come here and talk to me!"
Tanuja lost her temper. She ordered everyone to release Shahrukh. The man thinks he will get a chance. But unexpectedly, she actually slapped him hard on the cheek. Exactly like what Kajol did to him a few months ago.
"I told you she wasn't here. Get out of here or I'll call the police."
Shahrukh caught his breath. His chest goes up and down as his breathing quickened. "She's pregnant with my child. I just want to know the truth. And I'm not leaving until I see it myself."
Kajol and Tanisha saw all of this happening through the window. Kajol took a deep breath and let it out slowly. It was the first time she saw Shahrukh again after being apart for so long. Her chest heaved at the sound of the man constantly shouting his name.
Few hours ago...
"Shahrukh bhai! Thank you for coming." Karan greets Shahrukh in his office with a smile. He threw a success party for one of the films he produced.
Shahrukh smiled faintly and hugged Karan briefly. "Congratulations for the film, bhai."
"Thank you. Congratulations on your 14th wedding anniversary too." Karan looks around. "Are you alone? Where's your wife?"
"She is busy with her new project. I don't want to bother her."
Karan smirked. "Busy with work or busy with her new life?"
Shahrukh immediately frowned. "You know about that?"
"Of course I know. Kajol met me before she left. And tell me everything." Karan answered lightly.
Shahrukh was silent for a while. He didn't know how to respond. He wasn't surprised, they were friends. He knew one day Kajol would tell him everything. "Do you know where she is now?"
"You are the best actor in the country. But you're not a good husband." Karan shook his head. "Earlier you let Gauri leave. Now Kajol. You may be good at movies and the business but you're not good at marriage bhai."
Shahrukh gritted his teeth and held his breath. "You know nothing about my marriage. So you better shut that mouth of yours before some bastard hear it and print it into the headline for tomorrow morning."
Karan smiles. "I know everything about you. I'm your best friend. I know how those two women suffered because of you. Both Kajol and Gauri, they told me everything."
"Did she tell you that she made love to her ex while I was overseas on work? She also told you we lost our baby because of that, right? You defended her for that?" Shahrukh folded his arms across his chest. His lips curved into a smirk.
"That was rape. You're too stubborn to accept the truth, man. You only see your pain without wanting to see hers. Imagine how much suffering she had to endure all this time? Being raped, losing her child, being neglected by her husband, receiving verbal abuse every day..."
Shahrukh gets annoyed with Karan and walks away from him.
"...suffering from being pregnant with the child of a man who never thought she existed."
That last sentence made Shahrukh stop in his tracks and turn to look at Karan. He froze at where he was standing. Is that true?
Karan then nodded, as if to confirm what was on his mind. "She was pregnant when she left Mannat, bhai. Pregnant with your child."
Shahrukh looked at Karan with wide-eyes. His body seemed to be blown away. Cold sweat started to trickle down his forehead as his heart stopped beating. He was too busy dealing with his brokenness that he didn't notice it. He never asked about it. Even when she tried to tell him he was nonchalant. He realized that he was too immersed in unimportant thoughts. He instead allowed himself to be consumed by the incitement of the man who was the cause of all the chaos in his marriage. He regretted everything.
He walked back to Karan. "Tell me where she is. She is filming for her new film now so she couldn't possibly be overseas. There's no point in lying."
Karan took a deep breath. "I promised Kajol not to tell anyone about her whereabouts. You're late."
Shahrukh clicked his tongue and tugged at Karan's shirt collar. "I swear to my sister I will look for her and find her somehow. With or without your support." He looks at Karan sharply then leaves the party.
For Shahrukh, today is the first page of a book that tells the story of his regret for the rest of his life.
~ TO BE CONTINUED ~