I shook my head while thinking about Louisa’s request tonight. When it came to her I always forgot how to refuse despite being tired. In just a second, my problem easily faded when she was around. She’s genuine and it hasn't changed since we met. I didn’t understand why until now she had no boyfriend and always accompanied me at all times. I didn't want her to feel I was a hindrance to her. I had no right to do so or yet she just doesn’t want to. I remember when we were in college. A lot of men approached her and attempted to woo her, but she had entertained none of them. One of my friends said I was the one Louisa waited for, which was why she hadn't had feelings for anyone. Maybe it wasn't, I reasoned. I couldn't see any motive from her, nor could I detect any strange remarks from her. The irony was that Louisa was the one who encouraged me to flirt with other women. She is always willing to assist me with dating issues and had no idea that while she was pushing me towards others, I was falling for her and had continued to fall until now. It's difficult for me to tell whether I'm unlucky or not with the idea of always being with her, but she can't be mine. Having a non-platonic love with your friend is called betrayal and I betrayed her.
Precisely, Louisa didn’t deserve like me. I was dealing with Cassandra, and I didn't want the situation to worsen, especially since she was the only person I could run to. I was afraid that she would keep her distance from me. I can’t.
“Wow, You took so long dressing, ” She said in amusement as she saw me wearing formal attire.
“Well, I’m not sure we're going so I dress like this. So, Where are we?” I leaned on the car window before I got inside the car.
“Somewhere. Coffee Shop? Restaurant? Market?” She said uncertainty and started to run the engine.
Louisa drove fast as we arrived. I then felt my eyes were going to fall asleep anytime but I managed to keep opened-eye.
“Market?” I sarcastically laughed. “Why don't we go to the bar? Just nearby.” I suggested while we were on our way.
“We went there the last weeknight. Aren’t you tired? She took a little glance at me.
“Okay then let’s go to the market instead.” I stretched my arms and yawned in drowsiness. I felt tired but since Louisa is looking happy, I tried my best to have the same energy as her so she wouldn't feel I was being unfair.
“Seriously?” She uttered, looking astonished.
“Why don’t we buy food and spend the night inside the car or let’s hang out somewhere outside?” The good thing was my brain could function well at the moment to give suggestions.
“You’re clever! By that, you’ll be the one who’ll buy our snacks, okay?” She exclaimed in amusement and turned the direction left on the market so I could go shopping.
I could do nothing but agree so I bought snacks and drinks for the two of us and left Louisa inside the car. I hurried to buy so that the time would not be wasted lest we catch up at midnight. I was supposed to buy some alcoholic drinks but I ended up buying a can of soda. I just realized we couldn’t be wasted especially since we're on a long drive. “Is it enough?” I handed her the plastic bag.
“Yeah. Let’s go?” Louisa has already driven and it seems like we will travel for two hours before we reach the "somewhere" she was saying. I didn't notice where we went and how long she had been driving because I slept due to tiredness all day. When I woke up, the view of the sea on the road showed up to me. The surroundings are also brighter because of the moon so my spirit is even more awake.“How is it? Much prettier than bars? ” Louisa stopped the car on the highway road near the view of the fascinating ocean. "Yeah, we used to drive by here a lot, but the views are much prettier at night." I stared through the window, admiring the location where Louisa and I were.
Louisa got outside the car first to take a picture of the glowing sea. I followed her. The moonlight touched my skin. The calm of the surroundings and only the waves of water and the cold breeze serve as its noise. This is the place you just want to stay overnight. You can shout inaudibly and as if you have escaped from a turbulent world. "We can stay up late at night here." Louisa leaned over the railings and silently watched the strong waves. She just smiled a little and took another picture. "Smile!" She suddenly turned the cellphone in my direction so I tried to sign peace on the camera. I took my cell phone out of my pocket and took a picture of her as she did. "Smile!" She did a wacky pose. I laughed because her eyes were close to the picture. After all, She was dazzled by the camera flash. "Uh, Delete my picture please!" I showed her the picture and she was annoyed by the result. She even tried to snatch my cell phone from me but eventually, she gave up because she couldn't reach it from my hand. “The first picture must be kept.” I winked. We laughed together as we remembered something. I was not sure if we had the same thought but the only one I could remember was the first picture of us that until now made me laugh.
I told her about my audition and she was surprised about what happened. We also spent a few minutes talking and laughing while remembering the days when life was not so serious. She then said that she did not expect me to be friends, the fact that the state of our lives is far away, and that I am from royal blood like she was saying. She, on the other hand, is said to be living a simple life. I just forgot to tell her something at that time. I deliberately didn't tell her that I lived a luxurious life because I didn't want her to think that I was different from her. I also did not take her to the mansion but to my friend's house. I was used to lying so she was surprised when we went straight to the mansion on my mother's birthday. I felt sorry for her for the dishonesty. I remembered when I got transferred to Vinland University because Xymon and I were on different paths. My dad decided to depart us so we could learn how to stand by ourselves without the help of each other. That's where I met Louisa because we were in the same classroom. Many women approach me for close contact but Louisa is different. I was the one who approached and got to know her. I asked her how she got enrolled in the V.U so we could have something to talk about. From then on I was often with her until we got to know each other well as well as small things and problems. “Ouch! What’s that for?” I groaned as she hit my arm unexpectedly. “You said secrets don’t belong to us. What a traitor are you!” She rolled her eyes and turned her back to me.
“But you knew it when we attended the party. It wasn’t a big deal.” I tried to stop myself from laughing but I couldn't help it. She just scrolled through her cellphone.
“Lou?” I asked from nowhere as I noticed she didn’t speak for a few minutes and kept herself busy. Maybe she was sulking.
“What if I...” I was about to continue but it seemed I distracted her as she looked at me, raising her eyebrow and seeming like wanting me to say something more.
“ I’m gay.” I smiled strainedly, scratching my nape out of embarrassment. I don't know why that first came to my mind but at least I caught her attention.
“What?! A gay?” She was laughing out loud and seemed about to cry. I switched my reaction to a serious mood and sighed while Louisa was laughing continuously.
“What if I don’t want you to be friends with me, instead of more than that?” I seriously looked straight at the roaring sea. I didn’t speak after. Instead, I was waiting for her answer. Her laugh then faded.
“You’re just kidding right?” She gently asked back but I didn’t answer her instantly. I waited for at least a second to utter a word.
“Why are you so serious? I'm just distracting you. I’m not gay though.” I chuckled as I noticed that she was uncomfortable.
“Uh, Then that’s good. Oh, Wait! I’ll get our snacks.” Louisa awkwardly walked towards the car and I left behind. I smiled bitterly as I stared at her, realizing that I was still good at lying.