Day 4 cont
I don't believe it; I have uttered the word, and now I am feeling so ashamed of myself.
I can feel my cheeks becoming all red from embarrassment.
And to make matters even worse, he started laughing at me.
Does he think this is a laughing matter?
This is a serious issue, for heaven's sake, because my dignity depends on it.
That made me start crying again.
"And also, even the teachers will think the same now; they will think I am a shameless brat." I keep on crying.
It seems like he has gotten a wind of my sour mood right now, and so he has stopped laughing.
He sat close to me, and this time I am too exhausted to even move away.
"What's the matter if they think that we are intimate with one another? To them, you are my wife, and this is natural."
"But I am not your wife," I cried out.
I was silent for a moment.
He took a deep breath.
"Yes, I know, and that is why I respect all your boundaries, but to them, you are still my wife, and it's natural for them to think that, but that doesn't mean that we are actually intimate, does it?" he asks.
I don't have an answer to his question right now.
"People can think all they want, and we can't stop them, but what matters is that we know we are not doing anything wrong here," he continues.
That made my blood boil again. This is definitely my monthly mood swing, and it can't be reasoned with.
"The fact that you have tagged me as your wife without my consent is wrong; in fact, it's the most wrong thing that I've ever committed in my life, and I'm living with the consequences every day now," I storm at him.
Oh my goodness! What did I just do?
This is too harsh and disrespectful as well.
I think I should apologize. Yes, I must apologize.
"I see where the problem is; I'll go and rectify it then, but you should be ready to answer the query of allowing all this to progress for days," he said.
"And not to talk; all the intimate moments they all think we are having, they might end up tagging you as a seducer then, but it's ok, I'll just tell them anyway," he adds.
I have a feeling that he is trying to play with my mind right now, and it is working.
Between the two, I think I can handle being his wife until the end of this field trip.
By the time I had come back to my senses, he had already aimed for the exit, and so I rushed over to him, not caring about the tiny dress I was wearing.
I caught up with him by the door.
"Stop!" I managed to stay.
He felt stiff for a moment and then turned to me.
"What is it now? I thought you wanted this to end?" he asks.
Well, I want it too, but...
"I will be your wife," I blurt out.
Gosh! It has come out all wrong; that is now what I meant at all.
"Huh!" he explains.
"You will be my husband, but just for the field trip," I try to clarify.
He didn't answer me, but then he pinned me to the wall and covered my body with his, like he was literally pressing on my body.
I was about to shove him away when I saw a group of guys looking our way.
They are looking at us in a very curious manner, and some are watching as if it were entertainment.
Whoever sees us from that angle will think that we are making out again.
Good, more stories for them to tell. I'm sure he is doing all this on purpose now.
I tried to go on ranting again when he spoke.
"You are not properly dressed; that's why I blocked you," he says.
He's right, I'm practically half naked right now, and I just decided to walk out like that. How low can I stoop, really?
He just stood there, covering me from the guys while some of them whistled and walked away, and some ogled to find out what exactly we were doing.
But then, not long later, they are all gone. Finally.
He moves away from me and quickly pulls me into the room.
Could you believe me? I rushed over to pull on the sheet and cover my body.
I have given him a show of a lifetime. I mean, he must have seen everything when he was covering me from those guys.
"I'll step out for a bit so you can change," he says and walks out.
I quickly grabbed my shorts and put them on, and then I slipped in a t-shirt.
It's still not as decent as I want it to be, but this is all I could muster.
"I am done," I call out.
Now, how am I going to speak to him after all this? Will he also think of me as immoral?
Gosh no! It was just an accident, and he knows that.
Well, does he?
Why am I even thinking too much?
"You shouldn't be wearing such revealing clothes outside," he says.
"Uhmm, I'm sorry, it's just an accident; it won't happen again." I apologize.
Why am I even apologizing in the first place? I don't know.
He walks in and sits down on one of the chairs.
"So, about what you were saying earlier?" he began.
Well, I guess this is inevitable after all.
"I want you to be my husband for the field trip," I say.
He sat there, as if contemplating my offer.
Gosh! If this man hadn't been my professor, I would have called him despicable.
He has gotten me into this mess, and now he's acting as if he is doing me some favor.
Well, if he doesn't say anything soon, then I'll show him.
"Ok," he answers.
Ok, that's it. Just ok.
Well, if he wants to play it that way, then I'm in for it as well.
"But we also have to set some ground rules," I say.
He nodded.
"First of all, we have to have our separate tents from now on; secondly, no touching of any sort; and lastly, we should try as much as possible not to give anyone the impression that we are actually having... you know," I say.
He takes a deep breath.
"Two of your conditions can be fulfilled, but the last one..."
"No, I can never get intimate with you," I fired out.
"Easy there; I mean, for the first one, we have to at least pretend that we are staying in the same tent, and in that way, they won't suspect a thing," he explains.
He has a point there.
"Ok, I'll take it back, but under no circumstances are we to share the same bed, sleeping bag, or anything," I say.
"Agreed," he says, and now our deal is finalized.
I just can't believe that I am letting these shenanigans go on, but what can I do? It's already late.
Now it's time for us to work together and protect our honor and that of our school.
And I do trust my professor has a reason for doing all this; all I have to do is wait for him to tell me in due time.
**********
"So, today will be a lecture-free day for you; you are free to roam around and make your own personal observations, but do make sure to adhere to all the rules and regulations," he says.
Yeah, we have finally decided to come out of our shell, and now he is making an announcement that was supposed to be done an hour ago.
That's actually what the instructor came to talk to him about.
"Ok, go in now and enjoy," he says, climbing off the makeshift podium.
"Good morning, sunshine," Lily greets.
"Good morning," I answer.
"I see that two love birds are really in a good mood today," she teases.
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"I mean, you and your professor over there couldn't wait any longer and had to make us wait," she points out.
Yeah, it's true that we were late, but not for the reasons that she was thinking, and I don't think I'm inclined to tell her why.
"Just be careful not to make babies in the wild; you know what I'm saying," she nudges my shoulder.
Just then, the professor's eyes turned to us, and he smiled. I smiled back at him and even waved.
You know, after talking to him and making this deal, I feel kind of refreshed, like I can tell him anything.
"You must love each other a lot," she says.
"Yeah." That's all I said.
"Excuse me, I remembered that there is somewhere I need to be right now," I say and walk away.
**********
Here I am, deep in the jungle, taking my own personal tour.
I have decided that I want to cut myself off from the group and take some me time, and I am really enjoying it.
I am currently sitting beneath a tree and eating the sandwich that I prepared.
The sun is almost down, and the breeze is blowing every which way. I wish I could just set up camp here, but I know that I have to go back.
I spent more than an hour or so, or less, and then I tried to go back.
I pull out my map from my bag and try to find out where I am so that I can find my way back.
But the most unexpected thing happened.
The wind blew my map away, and before I could catch it, it had gone too far from my reach.
This is it; I am finally doomed.
This is the end of me.