Day 4
I woke up feeling as tired as hell. I've never been this tired in, like, forever.
It's like I have run a marathon.
I mean, we have been walking our legs out for the past three days flat, and it doesn't help that it rained just recently, making me feel all sick.
I just hope that I won't be falling sick soon; otherwise, it would be a disaster.
If I fall sick in this desert of a place, who is going to take care of me? I'll just be a liability to the others.
And not to mention that I am really looking forward to seeing that wildebeest migration thing if it happens this year, of course.
I sit up from the bed, looking at my surroundings.
It's sure nice to finally see a view that's not just sleeping bags and black tents.
The room is just similar to that of the governor's camp.
With the soft compostable bed, the ever-working air conditioner
The place is also covered with a tent, just like the former one.
I dipped myself back in bed, not ready to let go of the comfort already.
I smelled the scent of a familiar scent, and then
"Good morning," his voice said.
I tried to pretend that I was still asleep and ignore him.
I'm sure he'll walk away when I ignore him, but he didn't.
"I know you are awake," he says.
"Ugghh!" I groan inside my pillow and turn to the other side.
Can't he just get a hint and leave me alone already?
After what happened yesterday, I don't feel like seeing his face ever again. Never.
Now he has left me living with the stigma of sleeping with my professor, and that too in the middle of nowhere.
That's so unbearable.
"Get up; it's getting late already," he says, and I don't feel the seriousness in his voice.
"Get up, or I'll be forced to come get you," he adds.
Umph, I'd like to see him try.
I want to shout at him to get lost, but then that would be more disrespectful than ignoring him, so I just chose to ignore him.
It seems like he got the gist, as he was silent; maybe he has even left.
Thank goodness.
But then I felt his hands land on me and start tickling me.
"Oh my goodness! Hahaha, hahaha, please, hahaha, hahaha, stop." I tried to push him away, but he kept on tickling.
"Ok, ok, I'm awake now, please." I try to sit up.
But he kept on tickling me, and I laughed myself to exhaustion.
He has also started laughing as well.
Seeing him laugh up close like that makes me feel somehow; I just can't explain the feeling. It's so strange and yet so comforting, like some sparks at the bottom of my stomach.
His perfectly white teeth, the dimple on his left cheek, the way his forehead forms lines as he laughs, the sound of it—it's so mesmerizing.
I wish I could extend my hand and touch them.
I didn't even realize that he had stopped tickling me until I felt his hand on my face, caressing my cheek.
Most of his weight is now on me, but he has put some of it on his other hand.
At that particular moment, I felt that time had stopped altogether, like the planet had ceased to exist. It's just the two of us, and that's all that matters.
I started looking into his eyes; it's like I could see his soul, and he was looking at me the same way.
For the first time, I felt like I was seeing the real him. Not the him that he puts up for everybody out there.
All that strong-heartedness is gone, and now you can see all the exhaustion and pain he's been trying to hide. But what could that pain be?
Our hearts are now beating in sync with the rise and fall of our chests at the same time.
It felt so perfect.
His hand moved some of the hair that's covering my face from all the struggles.
His hand felt so warm on my face, like I never wanted it to leave.
"You are so beautiful," he whispers so slowly that it makes my stomach turn into jelly.
I've been called beautiful before, but nothing has matched up to the way he said it. I mean, it felt so special coming out of his mouth.
He said it in such a way that I actually know he means what he said.
He trails his fingers around my lips, and I let out a gasp.
Gosh! It feels so good.
I didn't notice that he had moved in closer to me, and now our faces are inches apart.
Our lips are almost touching.
I just can't help it but want to feel the touch of his lips on mine right now; that's all that matters to me, nothing more.
And it seems like it's going to happen anytime soon.
I closed my eyes, waiting for the moment to happen.
"Excuse me, sir, they are looking..."
The messenger trailed off when he saw us in that position.
I quickly pushed him off and tried to cover my body, not that I was naked or anything.
He was always quick to move away from me.
"Uhmm, I'm really sorry, sir. I didn't know you would be busy; maybe I'll come back later," he says, quickly rushing away without even waiting for an answer.
Oh my goodness! What am I going to do now?
This instructor has also gotten the wrong idea, and now he will be seeing me as some clingy wife or something.
I mean, who is so desperate to even be intimate in the wild?
And what if he decides to tell the others, Oh my gosh, I'm ruined?
"Get ready, and we'll go for breakfast," he finally decided to say.
I just glared at him.
This is all his fault; if he had not tried to tickle me, this wouldn't have happened. It's all my fault.
Suddenly, he starts to move closer to me.
"Stay away from me!" I screamed, moving farther away from him.
"Hey, what's wrong?" he asks, worried.
"It's all your fault; you have planned all this, didn't you?" I cried out, like with real tears.
I just don't know, but my emotions have been on a rollercoaster lately.
Maybe it's because my time of the month is nearing.
"What did I do now?" he asks, sounding confused and irritated by my accusations.
"You have made them think that; you have made them think that we..."
I just couldn't get myself to even utter the words.
I just rolled myself into a ball and continued crying.
He sat beside me and tried to touch my shoulder.
"Don't touch me," I growl at him again.
He lifts his hand in surrender.
That's right; he better move away.
All this is happening because of him, and he knows it.
I just sat there and continued crying.
"Nina," he calls my name in a soft voice.
I would have been swayed by it already, but not this time.
"Can you at least tell me what the matter is?" he asks.
Seriously, he is pretending like he doesn't know what is going on, huh?
I looked up at him with bloodsucking eyes.
"It's all because of you; now they are looking at me differently," I cried out.
He still looks confused as to what's going on, but this time around, I ain't falling for that, nuh!
"How are they looking at you?" he asks.
"They are thinking that I am here messing around with my teacher when it's not the truth at all," I blurt out.
He was taken aback by my words.
"I know I am supposed to be your so-called wife to them, but you and I know that that's far from the truth, and now they think that we are..."
"What do you mean by that? When didn't they start thinking that? I'm sure you are just exaggerating," he says.
Ok, so now I'm exaggerating.
"It's all because of what you did yesterday; you slept in my tent because of the rain, and I had to squeeze myself into a ball, and I had some leg cramps, and Lily and the others thought that." I trailed off.
Gosh! I can't even bring myself to utter the words.
"That what?" he asks.
Really, does he really have to push me to say it?
"That you and I slept together," I blurt out.
"Well, she's right, we did sleep together, didn't we?" he asks.
Ok, now I know he's just trying to play dumb.
"That's not what I meant; I mean, they thought that we had..." I took a deep breath, still unable to process the word in my mouth.
"They thought that we had what?" He pushes me again.
"Sex!"