Water will come to its end point. Leaves will dry. Birds will flock back to its nest. A day will end. Everything has its ending. But everything is not the end. Water will always flow until it's source will dry. Leaves will dry but it will be a fertilizer for a tree to grow then it'll make another leaves again. Birds will flock back to its nest but when tomorrow comes it'll go away it again. And day will end but their will be another day again.
And letting go of the person i loved and holding to, isn't the end. It's the new start of my life.
It's been a week since my graduation, been a week since we got the news about Blaire being pregnant. I saw Light was happy, so as Blaire. So I have nothing to wish for more, except for my heart to stop beating for Light and stop hurting when i see him with Blaire.
I seemed to accept it but i know i can't accept it. But is there anything i could do? Of course nothing. Whether i like it or not. I need to accept it, to accept everything. And i know, soon, i can.
Today, I'm gonna met Light. Even when my inner self cannot still accept a thing. I know I still needed a closure, we both need it.
Yesterday I talked to Blaire even when i don't want to, but for the peace of my self, i did it. And it turned out good. So now it's time for Light. I think about this meeting a lot, i had a lot of change of mind and such but thankfully at the end. I manage to convince myself to talk to him, today. This will my last day in the Philippines today, since tomorrow i had a flight to Dubai, i was newly hired to a company and they offered me abroad because of my skills. Without having a second thought, i directly accept it. Because besides from the big fee, I also want to breathe a new air, a new environment.
Away from the things, that was once my downfall.
I seated properly when i saw Light going out from his car. He looks so fresh already, unlike the past days. He must really be happy huh? He scanned the whole place to look for me, I think. So I raised my hand to get his attention.
"Hey, you waited?" he greeted.
I slightly smiled and shake my head.
Light clasp his hands together and put it on the table. He crouched a bit while staring at me.
"You're beautiful..." he stated.
I suddenly blink a lot of times and leaned in my chair. "Thanks..." I cleared my throat.
"Can you wait for me? And stay by my side?" he muttered.
I creased my head. "What do you mean?"
He smiled and shook his head. "Never mind,"
"So..." i wet my lips. "Why don't we walk, the sunset's so beautiful," I looked back towards the pathway.
"That's a great idea," he agreed.
So we both stood up and start walking towards the seaside. I really love the breeze from the sea, so relaxing.
"So...how's Blaire?"
"How are you?"
We asked in a sync.
We looked to each other and chuckled. "You answer first," he said.
"I'm doing fine." I shrugged and just keep that I'll be going abroad. It's nothing to do with him. "And Blaire?" i asked when he just keep staring at me.
"She's fine." He shrugged also.
"Is she having a hard time on her pregnancy?" I asked and cleared my throat making all the bitterness that's starting to creep inside me, go.
"Yeah...but not that worse,"
I slowly nod my head.
"You should took care of her. Especially she's bearing your child," i stated, almost whispering the last sentence.
I heard him sneered and never answered. "What's with that?" i asked unbelievably with what he react.
"I'm not the—nothing..." He took a deep breath.
"Huh?" I asked confusedly.
He chuckled a bit then leaned towards me. "I said you look dashing," he whispered.
I creased my forehead and push him away. "What's with you?" I unbelievably asked.
He chuckled again and shrugged. I twisted my lips because of that and just keep my mouth shut.
So? Is this the closure already?
"You should marry her when she gave birth...already...." I suddenly regret after saying those words. It just cause an awkward silence between us when i remember, we also talk about this when I'm acting like pregnant.
Light didn't answer, so another long silence stretched without us.
"Light..." I spoke to get his attention.
"Hmm?" i saw him look at me. "You love me right? You said it...Uh..."
"Yeah, why?" he directly replied.
I closed my eyes tightly. "I hope you'll get through it. I'm thankful knowing someone loved me, but at the same time regretful because you love me in a wrong way. So...I hope you'll unlove me as fast as you can, because i can't return that kind of love for you,"
He chuckled again. "Alright, got it," he meaningfully stated.
Why do i have the guts that he's just joking?
I silently took a deep breath and shrugged. I'm too assuming if he'll still love me despite of all the wrong things i did to him.
"Light I'm sorry for all the mess I've causes. For all the pain, the headaches, everything. I hope you'll be happy with Blaire, that's what i wish. Well I'm sure you'll be happy, you both already expecting a baby," i genuinely smiled. Really genuine this time but I'm still hurting. Well it's just normal though.
Light's side lips rose like he heard the most nonsense thing. "I'm not regretting because it happened." He shrugged. "And if I'll get through it again, I'll willingly go with it again."
My smile became small. So this is it, he's really happy with Blaire.
"That's good to know. And please take care Blaire for me," I shamelessly made a favor.
"Are you saying goodbye?" he amusingly ask.
I just smiled again to answer him and never spoke again.
Thankfully Light never asked that question again, and another long silence stretched between us while walking.
It was just disturbed with a phone call. Light bowed down when he heard it was his ringtone.
He picked up his phone and looked at me.
"Answer it..."
He nod then directly answered the call in front of me, the reason why i slightly peeked into his phone and read the caller ID. It's Blaire.
So...this is where it ends? Is Blaire calling him to go home?
That fast?
I sighed and just shook my head. Why do i care? It's her right.
To give them privacy, I moved a little farer from Light and stared at the sea.
I smiled upon seeing the horizon at the very end and when i remember the last time where i told Light everything.
Whatever happens, we always be have our boundary. Our horizon, that making us to meet but not to be with each other. There will always be an end point for us both but it's not the ending us.
It only took minute for to them talk and after it, i saw Light is kinda unnecessary. Even when he didn't say, i could tell that he's shy to say that we should part ways already because Blaire wanted him to be home.
So i stepped towards him. "You should go now,"
He faced me with creasing forehead.
"I still have an appointment today, so..." i shrugged.
"Do you want me to drive you there?" he offered.
I directly shook my head. "No need. My company's shuttle will get me." I said in assurance.
"All right..." he nodded but still not turning his back.
"So bye?" I smiled, fakely.
"Yeah...." He nodded and took a step while still looking at me.
I forcefully chuckled. "Go now..."
He chuckled and nod before fully turning his back to me.
I looked at him walking away from me. This is it. I need to move on already, there's no hope anymore. I should accept this already.
I tightly bit my lower lip when another heavy thing seemed to ran my heart. That after a minute, the side of my eyes started to heat up.
I immediately turned to look at the sea when i cannot take it anymore. When i couldn't suppress my sobs anymore. Promise, this is for the last time already. This is for the last time that i shed tear for that guy, that i shed tears because of sadness and pain. Next time, I'm gonna make sure that I'm gonna shed tears because my happiness and achievements already. I don't deserve this kind of pain anymore. This is enough.
Besides, I already did my best for Light and Blaire which my only role in their life. But it's not only because of me though, because even when many things happened because of me. The real cupid, the fate really made a way for them to met and have a happy ending because they were the true match. And no matter what, I'm always be there matchmaker.