Ezekiel was curled up on Asher's right side, peering over his waist at Cailen with a curious expression and a sort of amused glint in his eyes as he regarded Cailen.
The two of them sat there in silence for a long while, so long, Cailen was beginning to think that maybe he had dozed off and dreamt the voice but he was almost certain that he hadn't.
He was positive because Ezekiel was looking at him like that- like he was waiting for some kind of reaction from Cailen.
He supposed that look could have just been from Cailen randomly saying the words 'Yes, love', if Cailen had dreamt it, but he didn't think that was the case.
To be honest, he was hoping that it wasn't the case.
"Zeke, did you just-" Cailen went to ask but stopped himself because how should he ask that?
If Cailen did dream it and asked Ezekiel about it, he might upset the boy or make him feel pressured. Even if he didn't dream it, he really shouldn't make a huge deal about it by questioning it.
He should act like it was completely normal, encourage this even, not question it.
The thing was, he couldn't go on not knowing if Ezekiel had actually called him 'Dad' or not, because if he did, that was a huge step.
That was a ginormous step, and that would be amazing.
"William told me that Arabella was your real mom." Ezekiel started talking quietly, now looking down at the sheet covering Asher with a thoughtful expression.
Cailen had forgotten again that Arabella had been over to see Ezekiel that night.
"But that you call Eden ‘Mom’ because she's the one who took care of you when you were little. So I thought it would be okay to call you Dad."
Cailen was nodding his head before he could even think about it or Ezekiel could finish his sentence, a wide smile breaking out across his face because he couldn't help it.
Ezekiel wanted to call him Dad. Ezekiel saw him as a father figure, someone he can trust and rely on and that meant the world to Cailen.
That meant that maybe, he finally trusted them when they said they would always be there for him, that he had a family he wanted to be a part of.
That he wanted to be a part of Asher and Cailen's family.
"Yes, of course that's okay, Zeke." Cailen spoke, choking a bit as his eyes stung with tears of joy. "That's more than okay."
Ezekiel looked up and met Cailen's eyes, a smile on his lips before he giggled slightly.
"What are you giggling about?" Cailen asked, tilting his head to the side in curiosity.
"If you're Dad, what's Asher?" Ezekiel asked, giggling again. "This could be confusing." He commented, making Cailen bark out a laugh which he threw his hand over his mouth to cover.
He was just so happy, practically giddy, that Ezekiel felt comfortable enough with them to associate them with a very important role in his young life, and not only associate but also recognize that fact and be happy about it.
Cailen couldn't keep the smile off his face as he pushed the chair his feet were propped on away and stood. He was still smiling as he made his way around the bed, not wanting to risk touching Asher by leaning over him.
Ezekiel watched him the whole time until he was leaning down and placing a gentle kiss on the boy's forehead.
"You'll figure it out." Cailen smiled down at him, pushing his hair back and placing another kiss to his forehead. "Just know that we love you and we'll always be right here when you need us." He told him.
Ezekiel smiled at this, pushing himself up off the bed to wrap his arms around Cailen's neck in a hug.
Cailen wrapped his arms around his small frame, squeezing tightly when Ezekiel whispered something that had him smiling into the boy's shoulder.
"I love you, too." Ezekiel whispered so quietly, but it was easy to hear in the silence of the room with nothing but the heart monitor beeping and the slow pumping of the breathing machine helping Asher breathe.
"You better get some sleep, love." Cailen said, pulling back and guiding him back down onto the bed. "It's been a long day for all of us."
"He's going to be okay, right?" Ezekiel asked, blinking up at Cailen with wide worried eyes.
Cailen sent him a soft reassuring smile and reached out to stroke his cheek with his thumb.
"Yeah, he's going to be fine." Cailen assured. "Go to sleep." Cailen whispered and watched as Ezekiel's eyes fell shut.
Cailen's smile fell from his lips when he looked up at Asher, seeing all the tubes and wires sticking out of him.
Cailen knew what all those wires meant, he knew that they were keeping his husband alive but he couldn't help but hate them.
He hated that this happened to Asher. He hated that Asher had to depend on an oxygen tank and a breathing machine to keep him alive right now.
This shouldn't have happened, it wasn't supposed to happen.
He thought that when Asher decided that he was done being a firefighter, that he wouldn't have to worry anymore.
This morning was the first morning that Cailen let Asher leave without feeling the need to tell him to be safe or sending up a prayer to whatever God was out there to keep him safe because he thought his husband was safe.
Asher was supposed to have quit.
Why didn't he quit?
Tears were starting to burn his eyes as he stood there watching Asher's chest rise and fall with the help of a breathing machine.
He blinked them back and rubbed at his eyes before taking a shaky breath and making his way back around the bed.
He bypassed his chair though and went to stand at the head of the bed where Asher's head was.
He didn't know what he was doing, really. He was kind of just standing there, staring down at him and trying not to breakdown.
It was kind of ridiculous because he knew Asher was going to be okay, he knew that with time, all that will be left to show this even happened was a scar, but he still couldn't help himself.
It was hard to see someone you love like this. To see them barely holding on, waiting for them to wake up and knowing how hard it was going to be and how much pain they were going to be in when they did wake up.
It was just really hard and Cailen didn't know how to handle it.
He was keeping strong, not thinking about it for too long or too hard- when Ezekiel was awake because he knew if Ezekiel saw him scared or panicked, the boy would be too.
But now that he was asleep, Cailen could allow himself this moment, and only this moment, to let it show.
Wiping away his tears before was futile because more were already in their place, blurring the sight infront of him.
Cailen couldn't get over how calm Asher looked. While he was a chaotic mess, Asher was just lying there looking so peaceful and although Cailen knew it was strictly because he was unconscious and no other reason, he couldn't help but see the irony in it, or lack of irony, he supposed.
Either way, this was how it usually was between them. Cailen was a stressed out, frustrated, emotional mess and Asher was this calm and collected presence that would always bring Cailen back down and keep him sane.
Only now, it wasn't working.
Now, seeing Asher so calm, so still, had the panic bubbling up inside of him until it escaped his mouth in a sob, buckling his knees until he fell to the ground at Asher's side.
He bent his knees and hugged them as he buried his face against them, soaking the pants of his scrub suit, grasping at the tiny hope in his heart that his husband will return to him.