When we reached the car, Felix opened the door for me, his expression serious, but he remained silent.
“Are you angry?” I asked shyly, my voice barely above a whisper.
He didn’t answer immediately, instead starting the engine and letting the sound of the car fill the silence between us. My heart raced as I waited for his response, unsure of what to expect. Was he angry about Aiden? About how I had been torn between the two of them?
Finally, he turned to me, his expression softening. “No, I’m not angry. Just… concerned.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair again, a gesture that seemed to indicate his frustration more than his words did.
I felt a wave of relief wash over me, but it was quickly followed by guilt. “I know I’m making this complicated, and I’m sorry if I’ve dragged you into my mess.”
Felix shook his head. “You don’t need to apologize for how you feel, Jenna. I just want you to see things clearly.” He paused, taking a deep breath. “You deserve someone who won’t make you question your worth, someone who respects you.”
I bit my lip, feeling a mix of emotions churning inside me. His words resonated, yet they also reminded me of Aiden, the memories flooding back. “I get that, but it’s hard to just forget everything we had. Aiden and I… we have history.”
“History that’s causing you pain,” Felix interjected gently. “You can’t let it define your present or your future.”
I nodded, absorbing what he was saying. “You’re right. I guess I just need time to figure things out.”
“Then take all the time you need,” he replied, turning the car onto a quieter road. “I’m here for you, no matter what.”
As we drove, I gazed out the window, lost in thought. The city lights blurred together, a kaleidoscope of colors reflecting my inner turmoil. Felix was offering me something I had craved for so long—support without judgment.
“Where are we headed?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood.
“There’s a little café I know. They have the best hot chocolate in town. I thought you might enjoy it,” he said with a hint of a smile.
“That sounds perfect,” I replied, grateful for his effort to distract me. It felt nice to have someone care enough to want to make me feel better.
After a short drive, we arrived at the café, its warm glow inviting us inside. As we stepped in, the comforting aroma of freshly brewed coffee and baked goods enveloped me, soothing my racing thoughts.
Felix led us to a cozy corner booth, and I couldn’t help but smile at the intimate atmosphere. “This place is nice,” I remarked, glancing around at the rustic decor and the soft chatter of patrons.
“I thought you’d like it,” he replied, his eyes twinkling. “Now, let’s get you that hot chocolate.”
As he went to order, I took a moment to reflect on how different this felt compared to my time with Aiden. Here, I felt at ease, free to express myself without the weight of unresolved issues hovering over me.
When Felix returned with two steaming mugs, the warmth radiating from the cup felt comforting in my hands. “So, tell me about your projects at work,” he said, his tone encouraging.
I took a sip, savoring the rich chocolate flavor. “Well, I’m currently working on a branding project for a new startup. It’s been challenging, but I’m excited about it.” I began to share my ideas and concepts, feeling the tension gradually ease as Felix listened intently.
As we chatted and laughed, I realized that spending time with him was a breath of fresh air. There was no pressure, just genuine connection. But in the back of my mind, Aiden’s face lingered, a reminder of the complicated feelings I still had for him.
“Jenna,” Felix said suddenly, breaking through my thoughts. “I know this is a lot to process, but I just want you to know that I care about you. A lot.”
My heart fluttered at his admission. “I care about you too, Felix. You’ve been so supportive, and I really appreciate it.”
He smiled softly, a warmth in his gaze that made my stomach twist in a good way. “Then let’s take it one step at a time. No pressure, just… let’s see where this goes.”
I nodded, feeling a sense of hope blooming within me. For the first time in a while, I felt like I had a choice—a chance to explore something new without the weight of my past dragging me down. Maybe this was the start of something beautiful, a chance to rewrite my story on my own terms.
The next day, I received a message from Sara. It read, "Hey Jenna, just a reminder that it’s Riri’s death anniversary today."
A wave of sadness washed over me as I read those words. Riri had been one of my closest friends, and losing her felt like a wound that never truly healed. It was hard to believe that a year had passed since that tragic day.
I glanced at the clock, realizing I had a few hours before work. I decided to take some time to remember her, to honor her memory. I got up and went to the small altar I had set up for her in my room. It was adorned with her favorite flowers and pictures of us together.
I lit a candle and closed my eyes, recalling the moments we shared—the laughter, the late-night talks, the dreams we had for the future. Riri was vibrant and full of life, and it felt surreal that she was gone. I whispered a silent prayer for her, hoping she found peace wherever she was.
After a few moments of reflection, I felt a heaviness in my heart but also a renewed sense of determination. Riri would have wanted me to keep moving forward, to embrace life despite the pain.
I decided to message Sara back. "Thanks for reminding me. I’ll visit her spot later." I wanted to bring her favorite flowers—sunflowers, bright and cheerful, just like she was.
As I got ready for work, my thoughts drifted back to Felix. He had been so understanding lately, especially with everything going on in my life. I was grateful to have him by my side, but I couldn’t shake off the guilt I felt about Aiden.
Once I arrived at the office, I tried to focus on my tasks, but my mind kept wandering. I caught a glimpse of Aiden in the hallway, his expression unreadable. Our eyes met for a brief moment, and I quickly looked away, feeling a mixture of confusion and longing.
“Hey, Jenna!” Sam called, snapping me back to reality. “You, okay? You seem a bit out of it today.”
“Yeah, just… reflecting on some things,” I replied, forcing a smile.
Sam tilted his head, concern etched on his face. “Is it about Riri?”
I nodded, feeling my throat tighten. “Today’s her anniversary. I just want to make sure I honor her properly.”
“Let’s do something for her later, just the two of us. Maybe bring some flowers and reminisce a bit?” Sam suggested.
“That sounds perfect,” I replied, grateful for his support. “I’ll get the sunflowers after work.”
Sara had told me earlier that she had to head to Riri’s grave first because of a scheduling conflict. So now, I found myself making the trip alone, a bouquet of bright sunflowers in my hands. The flowers seemed to radiate the same warmth and joy that Riri always brought into our lives.
As I walked through the cemetery, my heart felt heavy, but I also found comfort in the serene atmosphere. The sun was shining brightly, and the soft rustling of the leaves created a gentle backdrop for my thoughts. I couldn’t shake off the feeling that Riri was somehow watching over me.
When I reached her grave, I paused for a moment, taking in the sight of her headstone. It was still adorned with flowers and notes from friends who had come to pay their respects. I knelt down, placing the sunflowers gently at the base of the stone.
“Hey, Riri,” I said softly, my voice trembling slightly. “It’s me. I miss you so much.”
I closed my eyes, letting the memories flood my mind—the laughter we shared, the secrets we confided in each other, the dreams we made for our future. It all felt so vivid, as if she were still here with me.
I took a deep breath and continued, “Today was tough. I just wanted to come here and remember you. You always knew how to make everything better, and I wish I could talk to you one more time.”
As I spoke, I could feel the weight of my emotions pouring out. It was therapeutic to share my feelings with her, even if she couldn’t respond. I let the tears flow freely, feeling a mix of sadness and relief.
“Things are complicated right now,” I confessed. “There’s Aiden… and then there’s Felix. I don’t know what to do. I feel so lost without you to guide me.”