Verina Vernon
 
I couldn’t help but yawn before I looked down at my watch. There were only five minutes left, and my boyfriend Jace’s last class was about to end.
After a while, I looked up and straightened my posture upon hearing the commotion of his classmates rushing to the door.
Finally, I smiled when I spotted Jace happily chatting with one of his friends. I called out to him.
“Babe!”
He stopped walking and turned his head in my direction. His friends also glanced at me, and I couldn’t help but overhear their teasing remarks.
He whispered something to them, and then his friends nodded, leaving him behind as they walked away. When I noticed he was approaching in my direction, I immediately greeted him.
“Babe, how was your class?” I asked with a smile as he came closer.
He scratched his nape and tightly pressed his lips together.
“Verina, how many times do I have to tell you not to call me ‘Babe’ when we’re at the university? It’s embarrassing in front of my friends and other people who might hear,” he said firmly.
I frowned slightly. I knew he felt that way, but I didn’t really care about what others thought or said. Besides, I wasn’t doing anything wrong.
“Let them be green with envy! They’re just jealous because they don’t have a girlfriend. So, let’s go?” I suggested.
He furrowed his brow. “What? Where?”
“I held onto his arm and smiled again as I remembered something. “Let’s go to the mall. I saw online that the book I want is now available in bookstores. I can’t wait to buy it!”
But my smile slowly faded as he gently removed my hand from his arm.
“Verina, come on. We were just at the mall yesterday. You can buy that book next time. It’s not like it’ll run out immediately,” he said, playfully messing with my hair.
“Besides, I already promised Fred that I’d join them in playing basketball today. I told you about it the other day, right?”
I tried to force a smile and nodded.
“I’ll just go with you guys then!”
He looked at me in disbelief. “It will take us until evening. Won’t you get scolded at home?”
I slumped my shoulders upon hearing that. I really wanted to be with him today, but I couldn’t stay out until the evening because my parents are strict about it. Well, it’s my brother who’s more strict.
He sighed. “Come on. Let’s just go next time to the mall. You should go home now. I’ll accompany you to the transportation.”
I pouted. “But I still want to be with you.”
He frowned slightly. “Verina, we see each other almost every day here at school. And we’re together every Sunday too. In the past few days, we’ve been strolling and eating out together almost non-stop.”
We continued walking. “But I only get to spend a few hours with you, while you practically spend the whole day with your friends. Sometimes, you even have overnights with them. Your friends are more important to you than me, right?”
He closed his eyes tightly, clenching his jaw. I knew he hated it when I compared myself to his friends.
No matter how many times he assured me that we were equally important to him, it felt the opposite to me.
“You know, we keep having this same conversation over and over again. I’ve explained countless times that I divide my time equally between you and my friends, but you still insist on holding onto that belief.” He stopped walking and looked at me seriously.
“I don’t care anymore. I already have so much on my mind because Mom and Dad are fighting again, and now you’re adding to it.”
I was taken aback by his words. It felt like tears could burst out of my eyes at any moment.
I couldn’t hold back any longer, and tears started streaming down my face as he abruptly turned away from me and walked off without looking back.
I bit my lower lip to stop myself from sobbing loudly. I quickly wiped away my tears and ran away, noticing that other students were starting to stare at me.
I went straight to the bathroom and locked myself in one of the cubicles. I tried to calm myself down, even though it felt like I was struggling to breathe and my heart was racing.
I angrily wiped away the tears that kept falling. Eventually, they stopped on their own.
I took a deep breath before stepping out. I looked at my swollen eyes in front of the mirror.
I couldn’t go home like this. I didn’t want Mom and Dad to suspect anything whenever Jace and I fought. I didn’t want them to further emphasize that being in a relationship was the wrong decision for me, especially since I didn’t want my brother to worry anymore that I might end up in the same situation he was in when he and Tiffany broke up years ago.
I washed my face and composed myself. When I faced the mirror again, I forced a smile—the kind of smile I always greeted Mom with whenever I came home.
But as soon as I found myself alone in my room again, I fell silent and cried once more. I kept checking my phone every now and then, hoping for a text or a message from him.
But my heart sank when I saw his “Active Status” on the chat. What hurt even more was the fact that he didn’t send a message or even see any of the messages I sent.
Eventually, the weight of my emotions and the traces of tears on my cheeks led me to fall asleep.
***
One day passed, then two. Finally, he read my messages.
But still, there was no reply, and it had been two days since I last saw him.
I smiled bitterly. He could really endure ignoring me. Yet, despite that, I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t bring myself to be angry with him.
Maybe it was because I loved him so much. Right from the start, I knew I was at a disadvantage because I was the first one to fall for him, but I still allowed our relationship to develop until we became an official couple.
I let out a deep sigh as I stared at my phone.
I couldn’t handle this anymore. If he could endure it, then I couldn’t.
Yet I found myself waiting outside his classroom again. This time I asked some of my friends to come with me, but none of them agreed. They didn’t want to witness my foolishness.
I lowered my head. I knew they were just concerned about me. They wanted to give me advice, but they chose to stay quiet because they knew I wouldn’t listen to what they had to say anyway.
But even so, I understood what they wanted to convey. They couldn’t understand my feelings because they hadn’t experienced this kind of love before.
Each one of us can fall in love, but only a few manage to stay in love and accept the flaws of our loved ones.
Right now, I am one of those few people. But I didn’t know how long my love for him would endure.
My attention snapped back to reality as soon as I heard his voice. I looked up, and our gazes met at the perfect moment.
He gestured to his friends to go ahead before walking towards me.
“What are you doing here?” he asked.
I lifted the pasta I brought. It was his favorite food.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to bring up the topic again. Let’s make peace. Can you really continue to resist me?” I asked.
He clenched his fist and stared at me intently. “You know I hate being pushed like this, right? Furthermore, I’m just sticking to what you think of me. You always insist that my friends are more important to me than you. That I spend more time with them than with you. Even though we practically see each other every day.” He sighed.
“And then, whenever I’m with my friends, you still want us to keep talking. If I want to spend more time with you, you can’t because you’re always worried about your parents scolding you. Now tell me, aren’t you being so irrational?”
His words made me blink. Am I really asking for too much?
I felt my eyes welling up, which seemed to irritate him even more.
“What? Are you going to cry again? Verina, do you always have to cry about everything?” He rubbed his temples in frustration.
I quickly wiped away my tears and tightly held both of his hands. “I’m sorry. Let’s make peace. It won’t happen again.” I let out a soft sob.
Gradually, his expression softened, and he gently squeezed my hand. “I’m sorry too. I try my best to give equal attention to you and my friends. That’s all I want you to see and understand. We can’t let our world revolve solely around each other, Verina. The world we live in is much bigger, and we shouldn’t just confine ourselves to each other. Do you understand?”
I nodded and smiled. “I do.”