I made him cry. Well, technically he didn't really cry, it was just a single tear. Maybe he can be faking it. I massaged my temple softly, my eyes were almost closing due to the sleep. It's almost been 2 hours since Wade went back to our room, and guess what? He locked the door of our fucking room. Fucking bitch. Worries washed over me as I rested my head against the head of the sofa.
I didn't feel bad about what I said to him, not even a little bit. There were no regrets whatsoever, because well, he deserved it. He can't fucking have the audacity to tell me that my mother isn't worth it when he is the one who betrayed me the same way, and he definitely cannot tell me she isn't worth it when he is the one who took her life. He didn't have the fucking right. And this time even he knew that he crossed the limits. I pressed my head against my hands as I pondered on what to do next. I can't avoid him forever. But what the fuck am I supposed to say, do when I see him next? Do I go and apologize? Yeah, no thanks. I didn't want to apologize but did I have to apologize? Also, no. So why am I feeling like there is a knot in my heart that is not allowing me to fucking breathe properly?
"It's probably because you sleep 4 hours a day and have your face inside the computer 20 hours a day," Kathryn's voice rang in my head, making me shake my head and I could feel a small smile form over my lips.
I miss them all. I miss the life, my life that I created for myself before all this marriage shit happened. It's been more than a month since I have gotten married to Wade and I still can't believe it. Wade . My thoughts drifted again to what I had said to him earlier. For someone who says that she doesn't regret what she said, I sure do think about it a lot.
My phone pinged with a notification, taking it from the table, I look at the text that was sent just a minute ago,
Grayson: you okay? Simple and plain, just like Grayson.
I texted him a few minutes - or was that hours - ago saying that I am in a life-threatening situation. Of course, he is used to me being dramatic, and he probably knew that the situation wouldn't be too bad because according to him Wade is "mature". Are we talking about the same Wade or does he have a twin?
My phone screen lit up with a call, making my attention turn back to it as I saw the contact name, Grayson💜. Realizing I had left him on read, I quickly picked up the call and put it to my ear.
"Hello?" a velvety female voice came from the other side of the phone, my mood instantly turned happy as soon as I heard her voice. She was Noor Fawzi, Grayson's fiancée. She was a native American and she had the prettiest hazel eyes I have seen in my life. The first time I saw her, which was like a year ago when she and Grayson got engaged, I was completely smitten. Her smile was fucking gorgeous and if she wasn't getting engaged, I would have totally gotten her number.
Okay, now I sound like a fuckboy. But not my problem that every fucking girl I see is so gorgeous? And when you see their boyfriend/husband... yeah no thanks, they most definitely deserve better. Sorry, not sorry. Kathryn tells me that I have a crush on everyone that I see, and lowkey I agree. Except for one person, Wade of course. Ew.
Back to the topic, she and Grayson worked in the same company as him. I think they are engineers or something like that. I have been living for 24 years and I still don't know what engineers are supposed to do. Whenever I ask people, they say that they "work," but what exactly do they do?
Anyways. Grayson's mother once came to visit him in the office and when she saw Noor, she found her really mannered and nice and was smitten by her beauty (ahem like I was ahem) so she asked Grayson if they could arrange them together in a marriage and to my fucking surprise, he agreed?? Trust me when I say, for the longest time I thought that Grayson was gay.
Okay back to the story, Grayson's mom sent a proposal to Noor's house and again surprisingly Noor agreed. They have been engaged for about a year, and I am desperately waiting for their wedding. Or for them to have a kid.
"Hi Noor, how are you?" I questioned slightly relieved that she is also here with Grayson to give me advice. It's not that I don't trust Grayson giving me advice, it's just... a man's advice can never be fully trusted.
"I am great, are you okay?" she asked with a hint of concern in her voice that made me smile again.
"Yep, just need advice on something," I said quietly, cringing at my words.
"From me or Grayson?" she questioned.
"Uh, both, if that's okay," I said softly. I am not someone who asks people for help like ever, there is just something in me that stops me from asking and makes me want to do it myself. I don't trust people, or you could say that I don't trust myself with other people.
"Okay wait, let me put it on speaker," she said, and I could hear low voices from the background telling me that Grayson is also seated near the phone now.
"Hi Sage," Grayson said sweetly, and I could imagine him mustering up a small smile on his face as he says those words.
"Hi Grayson, I am sorry for disturbing you both, so late in the night," I said, feeling a little bad.
I could hear both of them chuckle lowly before Noor said again, "Sage, you don't need to worry, you can call us anytime, and we will be there for you, okay?"
"Sure, yeah," I said, my heart feeling a little light but I know that feeling isn't going to be there for so long.
So I told them everything, starting from when I pressed the knife to his throat till when I told him that he should have been the one that died that night.
The more I kept talking, the more I realized something, this sounds like such a plot story, maybe I should write and publish it.
"He deserved it," Grayson finally said after a long period of silence. "But at the same time, he didn't know that you would feel guilty over your mother's death after what she did to you. So I can blame him, but you aren't innocent either in this case."
I opened my mouth to argue but nothing came out; deep inside, I knew he was right. I have been ignoring Wade for 2 weeks without any explanation right after telling him that I could give him a chance again. I don't doubt my intentions, they were right, but my way of execution was completely wrong.
But how can I be calm and composed with a guy who is going to lose everything because of me?
"Sage, stop overthinking. What you did was right in a way, trust me, I don't blame you. But now please try to fix stuff with him; I can't see the both of you suffer so much."
"There is a lot left to the story than we know, Wade has a lot of secrets, and he will only ever tell them to you. So please, think of it as your revenge or as a closure but please let him speak about the past. Avoiding it won't do you both any better, and I can't see you both suffer anymore." Grayson spoke almost pleadingly.
"Alright, so tell me what I should do now?" I sighed and questioned, I don't know if I am ready or not, but it has to be done. I have to get closure or my revenge.
"Don't apologize, you didn't say anything wrong to him, but try to win him over without saying sorry," Grayson says.
"That's like the worst advice I have ever heard." I groan and switch off the TV which was playing some music.
"Okay, fine," he takes a deep breath as if he is going to give me the most important advice in my life and continues, "bake him a cake."
"What?" I ask bewildered, how is baking him a cake and apologizing (without apologizing) the same thing?
"Oh my god, this girl," he sighed yet again, and then spoke slowly as if he is talking to a child, "Have you never heard of the quote that says 'the way to a man's heart is through his stomach'? Okay, now tell me, what's his favorite flavor in a cake?"
"Red velvet," I said quickly, a little too quickly.
"And you both say that you aren't in love with each other." I hear Grayson whisper to himself, or at least he was trying to whisper, which clearly didn't work since I heard him perfectly.
"Can you please focus?" I scold him, this guy is of no use seriously.
"Whatever," he mumbles, "Okay fine, what you do now is: 1. bake the cake right now. 2. go to wherever the fuck he is, probably sleeping his ass off while you are worried about him. 3. Just tell him that it was not your fault, but at the same time, it was kinda your fault, but you aren't going to apologize, and then shove the cake down his throat to call it a truce."
"Are you sure that will work?" I whisper, I can't believe I am actually considering doing this bullshit.
"Of course," he says in a tired tone, "okay now do this and have makeup sex or something if it doesn't work, I don't know. Now go do it and let me know how it goes later. Bye, love you," he says and hangs up on the call before I could even process his words.
Ew. I'd rather stab myself than have sex with him.
With a new profound motivation in me, I got up to make the red velvet cake for him. Not trying to brag or anything, but I can actually bake pretty well, unlike cooking, that's something that I will never understand.
I started by preheating the oven. Then I greased two cake pans, lined them with parchment paper, then greased the parchment paper. I whisked the flour, baking soda, cocoa powder, and salt together in a large bowl and set it aside for later.
Now coming to the main baking, using a handheld, I beat the butter and sugar together on medium-high speed until combined, about 1 minute. Then, I scraped down the sides and up the bottom of the bowl with a rubber spatula as needed. Add the oil, egg yolks, vanilla extract, and vinegar and beat on high for 2 minutes. I scraped down the sides and up the bottom of the bowl with a rubber spatula as needed.
With the mixer on low speed, add the dry ingredients in 2-3 additions alternating with the buttermilk. I beat in 2-3 teaspoons gel of food coloring just until combined. Then I vigorously whisk the 4 egg whites on high speed until fluffy peaks form for about 3 minutes. And in the end, I gently fold it into the cake batter. I then let the batter bake in for 30 minutes as I move on the make the frosting.
In a large bowl using a handheld, I beat the cream cheese and butter together on medium-high speed until smooth, about 2 minutes. I then add the confectioners' sugar, vanilla extract, and a pinch of salt. Again beating on low speed for 30 seconds, I then increase to high speed and beat for 3 minutes until completely combined and creamy.
I assemble and frost the cake quickly, tossing it in the refrigerator for about 20-30 minutes as I make my way up to my phone, texting my dad quickly.
Me: Emergency.
Dad 🤍: Who do I need to kill?
Me: No one for now, but maybe later I can take your help.
Dad 🤍: K.
Dad 🤍: What do you want now? Anything wrong? Want me and Kathryn to come over? We can bring Alisia also if you want.
Me: No no, you guys relax, just tell me where is the spare key to the master bedroom?
Dad 🤍: Did you guys have a fight?
Me: Something like that.
Dad 🤍: And he locked you out of the room?
Me: Yeah, dad.
Dad 🤍: wow.
Dad 🤍: I am going to kill him the next time I see him, just saying.
Me: Please don't. I have had enough of people dying around me.
Dad 🤍: Sure, but don't kill him yourself, don't get your hands dirty, just call me, okay?
Me: He is going to kill me if he hears you, dad.
Dad 🤍: Oh, totally forgot about that.
Me: 🙄
Dad 🤍: 🤍
Dad 🤍: By the way, the spare key is in the toolbox in my room.
Me: Thanks, daddy.
Dad 🤍: So, what's the plan now?
Me: Noor and Grayson told me to make him a red velvet cake, and I am off to his office.
Dad 🤍: Ew, okay, go do your shit, but call me if you need me.
So here I am, with the baked red velvet cake for the fucking bi... yeah no, I shouldn't curse, and the apartment where he lives. Just breathe, Sage, you can do this.
So I did. I went to the apartment and unlocked the door with the spare key that dad always keeps in the toolbox. Then comes the hard part, to actually find him.
He isn't in the hall, nor the bedroom, or even in the kitchen. Then where the fuck is he?
As I walk into the hall again from the kitchen, I see him sitting on a chair that's at the far end of the hall. He was looking at a picture of me and him that was hung on the wall. The same picture that I had hung there before. It was a picture from our first date, and even though I never agreed, he still hung it there, saying that I looked cute in that picture and that he wanted to remember me and that day. And he has never taken it off.
Me: Okay, I will. Love you, bye.
Dad 🤍: Love you, bye.