"I did it because I love you, Zariya."
I got up from lying down because what Prince Cozen had said earlier kept haunting my mind. To this day, I still can't believe what he said. I’m not even sure if I heard the last three words he uttered correctly, “I love you, Zariya”. After he said that, he turned his back on me. He left me stunned at the words he uttered.
There is a Prince who has confessed his love for me.
It's not just one. Even Prince Arsh admitted to me just the other day.
I can't measure my nervousness before, which is compounded by fear. Is this really what I'm afraid of?
What Tata Lucio says has already happened. Because of the love that the Princes have for me, everything is in turmoil. Things have now become more complicated. Prince Cozen has already been able to merge with my Mother. He was able to oppose his own Father King and his brothers.
I wanted to chase him but I chose to just go back to the kitchen because it was about to have lunch earlier. The other Princes might be even more suspicious when they don't see me serving them at the dinner table. I need to hurry to what Manong Luisito ordered so that I can go back to the kitchen.
I thought deeply as I walked back inside.
I was uneasy with all I had learned.
My discoveries in the Kingdom of Lacandia, the conversation we had with Haya Kaira, my Queen Mother and even Prince Cozen are the reason why I floated all day until now it's time to go to sleep.
I turned to Kharim Celia, she was sound asleep now while I was still not visited by drowsiness due to the amount of thinking. I am restless and restless. I feel I'm to blame for everything that’s happening right now.
From what happened to Ysabelle, I know I was guilty of her death because I asked Tata Lucio to reconsider in exchange for a heavy punishment. Perhaps the explosion and death of Ysabelle’s Mother and sister was the punishment defined by Tata Lucio that also led to my friend’s death.
Another is that I can't help but think that I have Prince Arsh, even though he fell in love with me. I exercised my heart more than my mind. I tried to stop but it was very difficult.
Lastly is that I don’t hold back how Prince Cozen feels for me. If I had only found out earlier, I wouldn’t have let it merge with my Mother. I will talk to him and make him understand the possible consequences of his complicity in the Kingdom of Lacandia. If I only knew that he would love me even if I didn't want to, I would have avoided him in the first place. Because of the love he had for me, he was able to betray his own family.
I didn't want everything to happen but it happened on purpose because of the actions I took that I was unaware that this would be the result.
I wish I had been more careful. I hope I thought first before acting.
I slowly got out of my bed and stood up, I carefully walked towards the side of Kharim Celia’s bed. I took the blanket at her feet and gently stroked him. Whenever I get dizzy, that's what I do because I don't want it to be deep.
I stared at her for a moment, she was sound asleep. I immediately remembered Mama. Whenever I couldn't sleep at night, I would go to Dad's room to check on them. I also secretly cover them so they don't get cold. Sometimes I even huddle among them to sleep there. I fall asleep when they are next to me.
“I miss you, Mom, Dad,’” I whispered into the air. “I hope I can be with you again. I hope you can still wait for me.”
I took a deep breath because something seemed to be stuck in my throat. I could also feel the tears forming at the corners of my eyes. I cried because I missed my real family so much. I want to see them and be with them.
I would love to be out of this world.
I turned my back on Kharim Celia and went straight to the window just on the side of my bed. The window is made of thin galvanized iron so I really have to be careful in opening it because it can make noise. I first removed the rope that served as its lock. I carefully opened both windows. It has a curtain so I tied it first so it wouldn't interfere with my view outside.
I'll just let the air in first, just in case drowsiness comes to visit me later.
I rolled my eyes outside. The surroundings are very quiet and only the chirping of insects from the woods can be heard. I can only see a few plants and trees now because it is so dark. Only the light coming from the moon serves as light and its light hits some of the plants there.
I looked up at the sky. Draw a smile on my lips when I see the moon and many stars there. By simply staring at it, the sadness I feel is relieved. Whenever I have a problem or resentment and I don't want to tell others, I run to the moon to release the weight of the feelings I'm carrying. The beauty of it makes me feel better.
The moon is always my run.
"Very beautiful!" I glanced in no time at the side of the window from outside. My eyes widened as I recognized the person who was the source of the voice.
What is he doing here? I caught him staring at me but soon he also took it back immediately and looked up at the sky. "I mean, the moon is so beautiful, isn't it?"
I nodded at him without hesitation. "The moon is so beautiful, whether it's full or not sometimes, there's no denying it's one of the best things ever done in the world," I said, still not taking my eyes off him. "But Prince Arsh, what are you doing here? You should be asleep by now. One more thing, maybe someone will see your soldier and report you to the General."
Luckily I wasn’t surprised by its sudden appearance. Otherwise, I had already made a noise because most likely, I wouldn’t have hesitated to close the window.
It was midnight but he was still awake. All I know is that it is forbidden for anyone to leave the palace at this time because of the explosion that happened in the past. The law has become stricter inside the palace today. Every action of the people here is careful because anyone can doubt. It was only seven o'clock in the evening when we had to be in his room.
But I also won't wonder why Prince Arsh is still roaming around at this time. His being a Prince is reason enough.
"You must have forgotten that I have powers that I can use to smuggle," he replied airily.
I just fell on my forehead. Of course, a Prince is in front of me now.
But it is not right for them to use their abilities to do what they want. These Princes really are, rebukes! Only Prince Ravi seems to be the most obedient of the five.
"Tsk!" I heard him smirk. "Ravi is the most obedient, I am the most handsome."
Woah! And he actually read what I was thinking.
He still looks up to this day. I took that opportunity to stare at him. Even from a side view, there is no denying that Prince Arsh is handsome. His puffy eyes, his sharp nose and her thin lips like softness, the delicious kiss. I was surprised because as I stared at his lips, a sweet smile flashed on it.
I seemed to be stuck where I was because of his sudden turn to me. He caught me staring at him! I immediately averted my eyes.
My attention now is on the outside.
"You admit I'm handsome?"
My forehead furrowed. When did I say he was handsome? Wait, can he read my mind again?
He giggled softly. "It's really a blessing that I can read the minds of others."
I could no longer restrain myself from slapping him. "You're so deceitful! Why are you reading my mind?"
"I'm sorry. I just wanted to know what you think of me too." It was still smiling.
"Even though that's still wrong! It's embarrassing," I said. I covered my face with my two palms. I mean, he also knew I was examining his whole face earlier, especially in the part where I said the delicious kiss on his lips. "Ah! Gosh! It's really embarrassing," I added.
I could hear her every laugh. He was still laughing at me!
"Oh, go ahead. I won't repeat. I'll never read what's on your mind again."
I slowly lowered my hand from covering my face. I looked at Prince Arsh who was also looking at me. Even though I was confused, I still tried to speak while looking at him. "Promise me," I insisted.
"Promise," he said sparingly.
I just smiled and looked back at the moon and stars.
A few minutes also prevailed between Prince Arsh and me before he spoke again. "You know, every time I look at the moon, you're the one I think of."
I did not look back at him. My gaze remained on the peaceful sky as I waited for the rest of him to say.
"Don't you know how I feel about you, Zariya?" I remember the night when he confessed to me. "Zariya, I love you. And I want to love you like the moon. Even if you are not whole, I will still choose you. Even if sometimes I don't see you, I will still look for you. And even if you are far away, I'm still watching from here. You're my only moon even though we have a lot of your stars. He sighed. "But I'm afraid you might be like the moon." He paused a moment before this continued. "When the day comes, you will leave too."
This time, I turned my attention to him. Something pierced my chest because of the last things it said. There is a good chance that will happen. My stay here is not permanent because I am determined to win my mission and leave this world, their world.
"But Prince Arsh--" He didn't let me finish what I was about to say because he suddenly changed the subject.
"We've been talking for a while but I didn't even ask you why you're still awake?"
I missed my parents again. "I can't sleep. I miss my family," I said weakly.
I really miss Mama and Papa, even my friends who I consider siblings. Are they okay? What could be happening now in the modern world? Would their lives have continued even without me?
"Come out, I'll introduce you to something."
I was surprised to be asked. "H-Huh? Who?"
"Just. Just be careful not to wake Kharim Celia from a deep sleep." He looked out the window and looked at Kharim Celia. "I'll meet you outside the door of your room."
He couldn't wait for me to answer. He has left in front of me and he seems to have turned to enter here into the servants room.
I looked at Kharim Celia who was still sound asleep. I slowly closed the window. I picked up the small gas lamp on the table. I started to walk slowly. I was very careful with every move I made because it might cause Kharim Celia to wake up.
I was already at the door and I also carefully turned the doorknob. No noise was heard. I turned back to Kharim Celia, she was unaware that I was coming out now. I'll just hurry back so that he can see me the next day and not ask any more questions.
I breathed a sigh of relief as I finally made it out of our room. I found Prince Arsh on the side of the door and waiting for me. She smiled when she saw me get out.
"Let's go?" He took the gas stove I was holding and held out his other palm. I put my hand on it and nodded at him.
Our scene is familiar now. It was also where we were standing that we first collided. The only difference is that we didn't know each other then but now, we are closer to each other.
We walked hand in hand down the wide hallway. We were also careful because it was difficult to wake up because of the noise that we were the cause. We stopped in the last room and turned right.
This is the direction in which I caught him then. Here he went and suddenly disappeared because he entered a tunnel that I do not know where to go.
"I'm the only one who knows of this tunnel."
A circular light appeared in front of us, it was super bright.
Will he take me where it's going? Can my question of where he goes every morning be answered? And why is he able to disobey his Father King to go out every night?
"I can't wait for you to meet him," he said which surprised me even more.
He is referring to that person. Who?
But before we entered the tunnel, I could not explain how I felt because it was as if someone was watching us now. It was as if an eye had been watching and tracking our every move. But I didn't do it, maybe I was just panicking because someone might catch us. So Prince Arsh and I had to hurry.
We sneaked into the portal together. For a few moments I felt my feet on the grass. We are no longer in the maids room. We are somewhere else now.
Although I wanted to know where we were, I couldn't because I couldn't see anything. It was so dark and I could only see Prince Arsh because of the light from the gas stove he was carrying.
"Where are we, Prince Arsh?" I asked.
"We're on Mount Puhon. The hidden mountain of Norland."
Hidden mountain? I didn't know that Norland had a hidden mountain. But what are we doing here now? Why is he coming here?
"What are we doing here now?"
But instead of her answering what I heard, the woman's voice caught our attention.
A voice approaching us. "Arsh? Is that you, Son?"
Son? Is what I heard correct? Someone called Prince Arsh a Son.
Does that mean?
"Yes. It's me, Mother."
Prince Arsh loosened his grip on my hand. He met the woman he called Mother. Even though he hadn’t introduced it to me, I knew she was the Dear Queen of Norland. The Mother of five Princes. The wife of King Valor.
I remember what he told me when we went to the Fragrance Garden.
I don't think that Prince Arsh himself hid from his own Mother. By the way, he goes to his Queen Mother every morning.
"Are you with someone?" asked his Mother.
Prince Arsh returned to my side. "Yes, Mother. I want to introduce the woman I love, she is Zariya."
Because Prince Arsh put the gas stove between us, I could see the whole face of his Queen Mother. I think she's in his 40's but her beauty is still very obvious. Her skin was very white and very smooth. Her whole appearance screamed that she was a true nobleman, the only Queen of Norland.
I bowed in front of her. "Nice to meet you, Dear Queen."
When I raised my head again, I was so surprised because the Queen was so close to me. I could see in her eyes, the indescribable emotion he was feeling now.
"Mother, why?" Prince Arsh also asked in astonishment.
The Dear Queen touched both my cheeks. The tears that had been forming in her eyes had already flowed down her cheeks. It was still staring into my two eyes.
I can't read her face.
"Y-You… Amity," she said which made me very nervous.
She knows me!