"Can you believe it? We graduate high school in just a month!" Sophie exclaimed as we walked towards our classroom, Mady and I flanking her.
 
"Feels like yesterday we were freshmen," Mady replied, "Speaking of, have you told Liam about your plan to study in Italy?" she asked me, turning to face me. Sophie also turned, her eyes curious.
 
I quickly averted my gaze. Before I could respond, two voices called out from behind. We turned to see Ace and Ken approaching. "Who's going to study in Italy?" they asked.
 
Mady and Sophie pointed at me. "Mira, she applied for a scholarship and got accepted!"
 
Surprise flickered across Ace and Ken's faces, but they managed to offer me warm smiles. "We're happy for you, Mira. But have you told Liam yet? What did he say?"
 
"Right, did Liam already know? What did he say?" Ace echoed, adding a bit of urgency to his voice.
 
I just looked at them, silent.
 
Mady glared at me as if I'd committed a crime. "Mira, what's the deal? Did he agree to you studying in Italy?"
 
I sighed. Why were they so persistent? "Just ask Liam."
 
"But he's still not here," Sophie said as we entered the classroom, pointing at Liam's empty seat.
 
"Then wait for him," I mumbled, taking my usual seat, keeping my gaze on my desk.
I guess Liam's going to be late, or maybe he's not coming at all. Honestly, I secretly hoped he wouldn't because I was afraid to see him again. I miss him so much, and if I see him, I might end up crying and feeling even more hurt.
 
I know there's a high chance we'll run into each other because aside from being classmates and living close by, we share the same group of friends.
 
Breaking up with him was the hardest decision I've ever made. I love him, but I had to choose what was best for both of us. At the end of the day, I know deep down that my love for him won't fade.
 
Time flies, and morning classes have finished, and I was right, Liam didn't show up.
 
"Why is that guy absent? He has my Math notebook! We have a quiz, how am I supposed to review?!" Ken complained, scratching his head in frustration.
 
I ignored them and silently stood up, joining the others as they left the classroom.
 
"Like you'd actually review. Even if you did, you'd still get a zero anyway," I heard Sophie tease him, drawing laughter from the others.
 
"But seriously, why is he absent? Did he tell you anything, Mira?" Ace asked me.
 
I shook my head. "No, I don't know." My voice was calm, but my heart ached.
 
"He's your boyfriend, and you don't know?" Ken's voice held a teasing edge.
 
His words made me stop in my tracks. "Well, why not? He's your friend too, and you don't know where he is either," I shot back, raising an eyebrow before walking past them.
 
As much as I wanted to tell them the truth, it felt like I wasn't ready yet. Once I reveal that we've broken up, it's like accepting that it's truly over. Somehow, I want to convince myself that we're just having a rough patch, even though I was the one who ultimately ended things between us.
 
"Mira, come on, tell us the truth. You and Liam aren't okay, are you?" Sophie asked me seriously, her eyes piercing. They were starting to catch on.
 
I quickly averted my gaze. "Why are you saying that?" I tried to play it off.
 
"It's obvious, Mira. You've been avoiding our questions about him all morning," Ace pointed out.
I forced a laugh. "You guys are just imagining things. Aren't you hungry yet? Let's go to the canteen, it's lunchtime."
 
I was about to turn away when Mady grabbed my arm, stopping me. "Mira, we're your friends. We can tell when something's wrong."
 
"Yeah, besides avoiding our questions, you've been quiet all morning," Ken added.
 
They were right. They were my friends. And they had a right to know what happened between Liam and me because he wasn't just my friend, he was theirs too.
 
I took a deep breath and looked at them, one by one. "We're over."
 
As soon as the words left my lips, I saw a mix of emotions flash across their faces.
 
"Huh?"
 
"What do you mean, 'over'?"
 
"What are you saying?"
 
"Are you kidding?"
 
I raised an eyebrow. "Why would I be kidding?"
 
"Because it's a joke, right?" Ken said, a hint of disbelief in his voice.
 
"Are you pranking us?" Sophie asked, still looking confused.
 
I scratched my head, feeling exasperated. "It's true! Why won't you believe me?"
 
"Because it seems impossible. Knowing you and Liam, it feels like you two could never break up," Mady said.
 
"Unless, he didn't agree with you studying in Italy?" Ken's voice was laced with playful sarcasm. Little did he know, he was closer to the truth than he thought.
 
"But again, that's impossible because Liam would definitely support you, he's head over heels for you," Sophie continued, her statement met with nods of agreement from the others.
"Ugh, these guys are so annoying," I muttered under my breath, rolling my eyes. Earlier, they were pushing me to admit something was wrong, and now that I finally opened up, they suddenly don't believe me. What's their deal?
 
"But it's true. Ken was right, he didn't agree with it," I said, biting my lower lip, trying to keep my voice steady and not cry in front of them.
 
"Wait, you're serious? I was just joking," Ken said, his voice filled with surprise.
 
I nodded silently, tears starting to well up in my eyes. They were all frozen in place, wide-eyed and speechless.
 
"All this time, you weren't kidding?" Ace whispered, his voice barely above a murmur.
 
"I wish I was," I said, my voice choked with emotion. "We're really over. Maybe that's also why he's not here today."
 
Mady and Sophie moved closer, rubbing my shoulders in an attempt to comfort me. "What exactly happened?" Mady asked gently.
 
I wiped my tears, trying to calm myself down and gather the courage to tell them what happened that day.
———
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. It's been so hard to face the truth," I confessed, my voice barely above a whisper.
 
Sophie looked at me as if I'd said something wrong. "What are you apologizing for? We understand, and Liam should be the one who's sorry. You don't deserve this. You're just chasing your dreams. If I ever see that guy, I'm going to punch him!" She paused, looking at me worriedly.
 
"We're here for you, Mira. You know, stop crying over him. There are so many other guys out there. A guy who will accept you and support your dreams, unlike Liam," Mady added, her voice filled with sympathy.
 
"Hey, come on, you guys are being too harsh on Liam! Maybe he was just surprised. I'm sure he regrets what happened," Ace argued, trying to defend Liam.
 
Ken nodded in agreement. "Besides, maybe he just said those things because he loves Mira."
 
Mady raised an eyebrow, her expression skeptical. "Love?! Are you hearing yourself? If he loves Mira, he would understand the situation! If that happened to us, would you act selfishly instead of supporting my dreams?" The way she said it, I knew she understood how I felt.
 
"Of course not! That's not what I meant. What I'm trying to say is... what if he's just scared? In the mix of his emotions, maybe he didn't realize he was hurting Mira with his words, but that wasn't his intention. He wants to support her leaving for Italy, but at the same time, he wants her to stay because, clearly, he can't live without her."
 
"That's just an excuse, Ken," Mady said, her voice firm. "If he truly loves her, he would understand and support her decision. He wouldn't let his own insecurities and fears get in the way of her dreams."
 
"But maybe he's just confused," Ace argued. "He's probably scared of losing her, scared of the unknown. He's just trying to process everything."
 
"You guys know so much," Sophie exclaimed. "Stop covering for him, because no matter what, he still hurt Mira."
 
"You know what, guys," I said, finally finding my voice. "I appreciate your support, but it's over. Nothing's going to change. We both decided to go our separate ways. I know I can't just throw away everything we had, but I can't ignore my dreams either." I knew if I didn't stop them, they'd start arguing, and we'd all end up single.
"So you're saying you're not going to try to fix things with him?" Ken asked, his voice laced with concern.
 
I shook my head, my answer a silent confirmation.
 
"Even if Liam begs you?" Ace pressed, his voice full of disbelief.
 
I forced a smile, not wanting to engage in any further conversation. "I'm starving, let's go to the canteen." I didn't wait for them to respond, turning and walking away.
 
Though I couldn't see them, I could sense their gazes following me, their unspoken questions hanging in the air. I could feel the weight of their judgment, their confusion, and their lingering hope that maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance for Liam and me.
 
But I was done with that kind of hope. It was time for me to focus on myself, on my dreams, on the future I wanted to build for myself. And that future didn't include Liam.
———
Before heading home, I asked our driver to drop me off at the village park instead of going straight home. I knew I'd just feel miserable if I stayed at home. Even though Bea was there and I could talk to her, I knew we'd just end up talking about Liam, which I was trying to avoid.
 
Right now, I just wanted some fresh air at the park and time to think.
 
When I got to my usual spot in the park, I immediately regretted it. The person I wanted to avoid the most was sitting there, exactly where we used to hang out. Liam.
 
I might as well just go home and mope in there.
 
I was about to turn back, but I froze when I heard his voice. Crap, did he see me?
 
"You just arrived, and you're already leaving?" His words had a double meaning, and I couldn't help but feel a pang of something in my chest.
 
I looked at him, finding him staring directly at me. I quickly averted my gaze, unable to meet his eyes. "Uh... I'm just going to find another spot to sit. See you later, bye." I mumbled, my voice barely above a whisper.
"Are you avoiding me?" I stopped again, his words hitting me like a punch to the gut. At the same time, I felt my heart sink. I tried to compose myself, to keep my emotions in check.
 
I glanced at his hand, noticing the lighter and the scattered cigarette butts on the ground. I rolled my eyes in annoyance. Why was he back to smoking again? And why didn't he go to class? "Why are you smoking again? And where were you this morning? You have Ken's notebook, you need to return it."
 
He gave me a cocky smile. "What's it to you? So what if I'm smoking or absent? We already broke up, so why are you still concerned about me?" He stood up and walked toward me, causing me to step back. I was startled when he brought his face close to mine, looking me directly in the eye. "Or maybe you're already regretting it and you miss me?" What if I could punch his face right now? The nerve of this guy! I broke up with him so I could go to Italy, and he thinks I'm going to miss him? Sure, I miss him, but I'm not going to admit it. Does he think he's special?
 
I rolled my eyes at him again. What was wrong with this guy? He was already making light of what happened between us just a few days ago? This was the first time we'd seen each other since the breakup, and it felt like he didn't care, like he'd already moved on? It was as if he could just make a joke out of what happened to us.
 
This was so frustrating! I was crying to Sophie and the others, and this jerk was acting like nothing happened!
 
"You know what, I don't even know why I'm talking to you!" I was about to walk away but he stopped me.
"Wait, Mira."
I raised an eyebrow at him. "What now?!"
 
"Don't leave."
 
Was he trying to stop me from going to Italy? I smirked, feeling a little amusement mixed with annoyance. He was teasing me about missing me, but he didn't want me to leave? "We already talked about this. I'm choosing my dreams."
 
His face contorted in confusion. "Dreams? What?"
 
Was he serious? I had repeated this to him countless times. My dream of studying in Italy. I was about to explain again, but then something seemed to click in his mind, and he burst out laughing.
 
This guy is unbelievable. "What's so funny?!" I snapped at him, annoyed.
 
"Mira, I already accepted that you're going to Italy. I'm genuinely happy for you. But what I meant when I said don't leave is… don't leave the park. I'll leave instead."
 
My jaw dropped at his words. A part of me wanted to be touched by what he said, but my embarrassment was overwhelming.
 
Crap, did I just make a huge assumption? I felt like I wanted to disappear into the ground, I'm so embarrassed about my misinterpretation. "I-I know!" I said defensively. "I was reminding you that I'm going to Italy. You're the one who misunderstood!"
He slowly nodded. "Ah, okay." Why did I feel like he didn't believe me? "Okay, I'll leave. I know it's awkward for you to talk to me. To tell you the truth, I feel the same way." He said, starting to walk away.
 
I didn't say anything, just watching him go until he stopped and turned back to face me.
 
"Mira." Something about the way he said my name made my heart skip a beat. "I know I messed up. I also know your decision won't change, but I really want us to get along. So can you give me another chance? Let's stay friends, Mira."
 
I bit my lip, staring back into his pleading eyes. "Okay. Let's stay friends."
 
He smiled as he heard my response. "I'm glad you said that. Okay, I'll go now. I'll see you tomorrow at school, Mira."
 
Once he left, I stood there, a heavy weight settling in my chest. Before I knew it, tears were streaming down my face. I tried to wipe them away, but they kept coming.
 
I should be happy, right? Because at least we're still friends. But why did I feel this way? Why couldn't I accept that we were just friends now, even though I was the one who decided to break up with him?
 
Maybe it was because a part of me still hoped for something more, even though I knew it wasn't possible. Or maybe it was because I was afraid of losing him completely. Whatever the reason, I knew I needed to figure this out before I left for Italy. I needed to understand my feelings and accept the reality of our situation.
 
I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down.
Sometimes, even staying friends feels like a farewell.