Bumpy and lots of tiny rocks scattered on the muddy ground. The trip wasn't that nice, rain sharted pouring just when we entered the forest of the Zraidfield though thankfully, no guards and some knights is patrolling the mountain. It was hard traveling and the sun started setting out already so we all decided to stop by. We wanted to stop in the next town to rent a room but the weather is not with us now, the rain gets stronger and stronger and the horses stopped midway. We don't have any other choice but to seek refuge in the nearest cave, thankfully, there is one.
Samson and Leopard made a fire inside the cave while Regor and Gerald took care of the horses, feed it, and made sure they are safe from the rain. Lilian, Marion, as well as Von, and Thommy prepared dinner for us. I tried helping but I can't, I am afraid that I am not confident with my cooking skills. So I pleased myself by reanalyzing our maps. I wanted to read the letter Padre handed me but I can't find the right time, I don't want them to find out who I truly am.
They won't be happy if they realize that the crowned princess of this kingdom was with them all the time. I don't like to lie but I don't want to break their feelings, yes, this wasn't planned at all. They took me, an good for nothing princess who only follows what the books said and what was taught. I was told when I was young that I can adapt to my surroundings no matter the scenarios and here I am, completely acting friendly with the people who abducted me.
Up until now, I am afraid to encounter other people who can recognize me. Not all are like Padre Sotto, some are pure evil and will only do the things they want despite the people they will ruin just to reach their foolish goals.
"Hey," Jake silently greeted snapping me back to reality. "You okay? You've been looking on the map ever since, I don't think you are reading it or what. What's the problem?" He worriedly added. I looked at his face and sighed.
I returned the map to its bag and sighed again. He moved closer to me and fixed the blanket on my back as he slowly patted my shoulder. I closed my eyes and felt his soft touch on my body. This one, this one will eventually disappear as time goes by, and I don't want it.
Both of us may start weirdly but I cannot deny that he already captured me, he may not notice it now since I am doing my best to keep it to myself but he did steal my heart a long time ago and I am scared to take it back from him. I cannot afford to lose him but I cannot choose between him and my people because I know that we are not for each other. I don't want to leave him and me heartbroken.
I know that the greatest crime a human can commit is breaking someone's heart. I don't him to wait for me who will surely abandon him when the time comes. Yet my heart, my heart aches so much with the thought of being separated from him and seeing him love someone other than me.
"Vienna, don't scare me," He worriedly stated. I opened my eyes and smiled sweetly at him. "I am fine, I am just cold," I replied. HE sighed in relief and took the blanket away from me.
I stared at him in disbelief but he stood up and sit at my back and hugged me from behind. Giving me his heat from behind and I can say, it works, perfectly. I let him hug me closely and transfer his heat into my body.
"I can't believe you are not pushing me away my lady," he chuckled. I smirked and ignored him. "I like you, very much Vienna." He confessed that made me flinched. I heard him laugh which made my face redder than usual.
"S-shut up," I replied. "Why?" he whispered, his warm breath tickling my neck that I hit him in his arm that is hugging me in my waist. "S-stop it if you don't want me to push you away," I ordered, he pouted but still followed me.
The rain still pours strongly and the others are busy doing their things, they saw us but didn't even say a thing. Or maybe they already knew that Jake liked me, I felt embarrassed by saying it.
"Vienna," he said. "Hmm?" I replied.
"I am serious, I like you, or maybe more than that, I m not sure of what I truly feel towards you anymore." He confessed. I turned my head to look at him but his eyes were close and were buried at the back of my neck.
"Do, do you see me the other way around too? As a man?" he asked which made me wonder.
Yes, yes I do. I wanted to be with you but I am scared. I want to stay by your side but I can't because I am scared. Scared that many of my people will suffer more while I am with you, is what I want to at him but I can't find my courage.
"Or, maybe, Are you scared?" He asked again, this time I nodded a response. "What if I told you, I knew you? I know something that the others don't and I am ready to steal you away from everyone." He added that made me stop. Fear started to linger on my body.
"Don't be scared, darling. Please don't, I don't want to be hurt deeper, I am already embracing delicate flowers with thorns and it stabs me quite deep and I don't know if there are cures of the poison." He whispered. "Just tell me you feel the same way and I am ready to defend you with my life, crowned princess?" he murmured which froze me. I bit my lips hard that I did not notice the blood dripping from them.
"Since when? Since when did you know it?" I nervously asked. He sighed and answered. "Long ago, back when your necklace was in my brother's possession. I accidentally opened it and saw your picture,"
That can't be, the lock on my necklace wasn't even touched or maybe, I saw it wrong. Then why? Why did he not tell the other then? Why did he protect me?
"I thought it wasn't that big deal since you came from a wealthy noble family and I thought it isn't suspicious that you are wearing a crown that wonderful but, when I heard you and that Sotto talked, I am certain that you are one." He added. "And I understand that you want to keep it from us, up until now, I felt sorry for bringing you into this trouble so I want to protect you, I want to return you safely to where you truly belong, but,"
"But fuck it, just tell me you don't feel the same way so I can finally distance myself from you because if not, I will go crazy and crazy everything I can see you." He pleaded.
"You said you already know, then you must have known too the responsibility lies on my shoulders. It's heavy, Jake. So heavy that I can't afford to carry another thing in my life. I wanted to stop, I wanted to escape but I can't." I replied quietly hoping that no one will hear us.
"And my kingdom is not okay right now, I wanted to fix this, I wanted to clean my world so that even people like you are accepted in here, I want to have a free world, that is why I am doing it," I added.
"All by yourself? Do you think you can do it, alone? Vienna I am not telling you to stop but let me, let me help you." He pleaded. I sighed and shrugged.
"I don't know anymore, what should I do?" I asked and wiped away my tears.
"I don't care who you are, what you are, or even where you came. All I want is you, just tell me and I will always stay by your side. Let me protect you, even if it's temporary." He begged and hugged me tightly.
I want him. I want him badly but I don't want him to be my temporary, that will break both our hearts. I want to be proud that I have him, I want to show everyone the man I want to spend my life with. But I don't want to let my feeling for him unsaid. It's fine being selfish for once right? Can I have him, just for a little time?
"Jake, it will hurt us. It will leave scars in our hearts, I don't want to hurt you." I pleaded and intertwined our hands. He shrugged. "No, I am ready for this. I am fully aware but please allow me to love you. Just let me love you." he answered.
"Jake,"
"Hmm?"
"I don't want you to protect me," I stated. "Protecting me means hurting yourself. Giving your life to me to protect me is not what I want from you. But,"
"but?"
"Will you like me and shower me with your affections while we are together?" I asked and faced him. He look so surprised but smiled at me and nodded.
"I will like- no, I will love you and will take good care of you until you found your way home. It will hurt but I am ready, so thank you. Thank you for giving me this chance." He exclaimed and hugged me tightly. I slightly patted his back.
"Thank you for loving me and keeping me safe all the time," I confessed. "I am scared all this time without knowing that someone is with me. I am sorry, for keeping you waiting and for hurting you." I added.
"I know, thank you," Jake stated and smiled. "Does that mean, I can kiss you now?" He said and smirked. I rolled my eyes and shrugged.
"Aren't you a little fast?"
"Hey! We already kissed before. French Ki--" I immediately covered his mouth. I can feel my face burning.
"Shut up Jake or I am going to take my word back!" I threatened him but the man laughed at me and smirked.
"C'mon darling, can I at least have my reward for being a good and a handsome man?"
"Jake!"
"Fine." He pouted and stood up. I thought he will walk away but the bastard stole a kiss from me, again. Ugh, I can't believe him. I was about to throw a stone at him but he did his best to run away.
Bastard, if I don't love him too. I had already stabbed him with my dagger. I didn't know that he knows me all this time. I sighed and smiled, now I know I am not alone in this fight.
Thank you, thank you for loving me.