Shinai left Erinoi and hugged him a good night. Her cousin will probably take his time, all night to watch his favourite game. She’s back in her own room, she went plopping to her desk. She did take the seat. Uncertainty came to her at this point. She doesn’t feel like sleeping as she isn’t feeling sleepy. 
Her desk, this is her major spot. When she’s alone on her own she is free to do everything. This space is hers. Unthinkinally, she started tapping her table. Her desk isn’t empty. Notebooks piled, books on the side, the different coloured pens she had, stationaries, notes, and her journal in which she writes her everyday life in it. She can work for hours in regards to her school stuff, she can read, she can write, she can do almost everything on her own. She’s with herself. She can feel that she is the most realest, whenever she is in her room. That she is her, and her identity is intact. She is the most comfortable when she is alone, with herself. Her, sitting on her what she labelled as her throne. Her chair is her majesty. 
She swivelled her chair. She turned it before she turned to the other side again before she reached for the pen and started to write something in her private journal. With a strong chin that was moved forward, she began writing. 
(Today marks the…) 
She began to feel the rising anger in her. She was mad while she was writing. She can feel her tightened grip on the pen she was holding while glaring her eyes down. She was glaring too much at the paper. She looked down, repeatedly check what she wrote. She began to feel the annoyance flared. She hated the way she writes. She started discriminating her own writing. Shinai scrawled carelessly. She then stopped. And she raised her journal to level with her face. She then looked at what she wrote, her handwriting, her words. She then shook her head and closed it. She closed it before her eyes went to the bed. She left the pen on the table, not bothering to put it back. Shinai then jumped on the bed. She then eyed the orange teddy bear that Jordan gave to her. Shinai started on recalling the day when Jordan Edon gave it to her. It was on the first day of the month. January 1, 2017. 
Analepsis: 
Shinai was checking her social media account, scrolling past every post that appeared on her feed. She checked the message section. Her friends and acquaintances were chatting and greeting her a “Happy New Year”. She happily smiled. She started replying to them until another chat appeared. She stared at it. 
It was from Jordan. She was fast to check it. Jordan sent her a Snoppy sticker, with Charlie Brown. The Peanuts, she said to herself before her smiled widens. The characters were both carrying the signboard that says, “Happy New Year.” A moving sticker, she found herself smiling again. Shinai went to find another cartoon, she scrolled to choose a gif that she will send to him. Her eyes light up, she finds one with bears in it. Jordan saw what she sent to her. He was typing. 
Edon: “Speaking of bears.” He typed and sent it to her. 
Nai smiled. She tapped the keys. “We’re greeting each other, “Happy New Year.” We’re not even talking about bears. Why the sudden mention of it?” 
The happy look of Jordan having an expression on full smile came to her mind. Shinai can imagine him laughing on the other side. 
Edon: “Well, I have a gift for you.” He typed again. 
Her face lit up. “Really?” Shinai wondered what it is. 
Edon: “I’ll have it delivered to your house. But the deliverer is me too.” Jordan sent the message with a smiley emoji. 
She smiled and tilted her head for a bit before she went to sit on the sofa. 
Shinai: “Are you not afraid of getting hit by a fire cracker?” Shinai jolted on her seat when she heard the a strong sound that came from the firecracker. Her eyes went back on the screen again. Edon was typing. 
Edon: “Well, your house is only 3 blocks away. But you’re right. It’s better to be cautious.” Jordan sent an emoji that was laughing. Followed by a monkey gif, it was crying because of joy. 
Shinai shook her head. Typical Jordan, he loves sending her like these. 
Shinai: “It looks like you.” She joked. 
Edon: “I am not afraid of fire crackers, Nai. I will give the gift to you. Just wait for a bit.” 
Shinai: “Wait. You’ll walk?” 
Edon:: “Uhh, yes. But if you want me to fly, I couldn’t do that.” 
Shinai: “Jordan Edon!” 
He didn’t reply. 
Shinai placed the phone on the table. It’ll probably take a few minutes before he can reach their house.
“Nai. Dear, I need your help!” It was her mother’s voice who caught her attention. Her mother was asking for her help with her plating. She was calling from the kitchen. Nai stood from her sit to go and see her. 
She happily smiled back at her mother. Nai got the bowl out of her and went to placed it on the table. It’s a tradition, cooking meals for the “Media Noche”. Her mother and her family celebrated that tradition. 
She remembered her Mom’s stories about how they prepared for it. The celebration of New Year is a fun one for her mother and her family. The days of those amazing holidays, her mother told her great stories about her experiences. Shinai wanted that too. But they’re far from home now. She couldn’t easily meet her grandparents. The distance was the main problem Nai can think of that is hindering her from meeting them. A distance that cannot be reached by her because they were so far, super far from her and her mother. She couldn’t be with them no matter how many times she longed to reach them. 
Her grandparents… They weren’t alive anymore. Both her grandmother and grandfather were dead. It was her grandpa who left first. Before her grandmother followed her grandpa, she left after year her grandfather passed. She blinked her eyes a few times. She blinked them in fast flutters of her lids. 
“That’s a real true love.” One not leaving the other behind, even though a year passed before her grandma died they were able to head into the same pathway. It was something. She uttered silently to herself, while she was keeping herself in control from letting her tears fall from her eyes.