Nurin POV
The Lake Van
I could feel it—the silence hanging between us after breakfast. There was a heaviness to it, as if he wanted to ask me something but didn’t know how. It was like every step we took, his thoughts trailed behind us, bothering him in ways he wouldn’t say out loud. Something was off—I just couldn’t put my finger on it.
As we walked back to his car, I noticed him scratching the back of his neck while nodding to someone on the phone. I couldn’t tell if I’d done something wrong or if he was just in a mood. Was he upset with me? Or simply distracted?
Once we were back inside the car, he let out a deep sigh before finally speaking. The silence he had been giving me felt like the kind couples give each other when they’re in the middle of an argument. But we weren’t a couple. That’s what bothered me even more.
It made me question everything. What are we? Why are we on this trip? Why does this feel so complicated?
He started talking again, but my mind was too clouded with thoughts to fully process his words. Then, I felt his hand gently touch my left shoulder. I turned to him, confused.
“Sorry, were you saying something? ” I asked. “I was just thinking—”
He cut me off gently.
“I was saying… maybe we should cancel this countryside trip. I think I need to take you to the hospital.”
I was stunned—shocked and caught off guard—when he said we should go to the hospital instead.
I didn’t know how to respond. All I knew was that I couldn’t go. I couldn’t let him find out the truth—that I was sick.
He kept driving, but I gently tapped his arm to get his attention.
“We can’t go to the hospital. We can’t ruin this trip. I’m okay, really. There’s nothing to worry about.”
He glanced at me, saying nothing. I could tell his mind was racing with thoughts, but I wasn’t about to let his worry take control of mine.
Trying to break the silence before it deepened, I added, “Look... Please, we can’t do this. I came to Turkey for this trip, and I don’t want to waste it by being confined in a hospital. Just… please, let’s not go.”
He noticed I was panicking and pulled the car over. Gently, he reached for my hand and leaned closer, whispering with calm urgency as tears streamed down my cheeks.
“Hey, hey. Breathe. It’s okay. We’re not going to the hospital, alright? Just calm down. Please don’t cry.” His voice grounded me. Slowly, I started to calm down.
Once I had collected myself, he asked, “What’s going on, Nurin? I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to do—it’s your choice. But please, talk to me. Let me help you.”
I was quiet for a moment. Then I took a deep breath and finally spoke, “I can’t tell you everything right now. But I promise… after this trip, I’ll tell you everything you want to know.”
He looked at me with concern but nodded.
“Alright. I won’t pressure you now. But promise me this—after the trip, we go to the hospital. And if anything happens while we’re on the road, we stop everything and go immediately. “No questions,” he said.
I nodded slowly, tears still in my eyes.
“Promise,” I whispered.
With everything finally settled between us, we continued the trip. My bucket list felt like it was waving hello, and I couldn’t help but feel a rush of excitement. Deep down, I knew this journey wouldn’t be easy—but I was determined to make it feel that way. I couldn’t afford to be difficult, stubborn, or worse, a burden—not to him and not to this experience.
I couldn’t let myself get sick during this trip. I couldn’t let him see my strength fading, even if it was happening slowly. I only hoped I could keep up with his energy—because from the way he was acting, I knew he had brought everything he had into making this trip unforgettable.
After a long drive, we finally reached our first destination: Antalya.
I knew a lot about this city from the journals and articles I’d read. Antalya is the fifth-most populous city in Turkey and the capital of Antalya Province. Located on the southwestern coast of Anatolia, it's framed by the majestic Taurus Mountains and stands as the largest Turkish city on the Mediterranean coast outside the Aegean region. Over one million people live in its metropolitan area.
From what I’ve studied, Antalya was first settled around 200 B.C. by the Attalid dynasty of Pergamon, and not long after, it came under Roman rule. That era saw the city flourish—with new monuments like Hadrian’s Gate being built and surrounding cities growing under Roman influence.
The city has changed hands many times—falling to the Seljuk Sultanate in 1207 and later to the Ottoman Empire in 1391. Under Ottoman rule, Antalya enjoyed nearly five centuries of relative peace and stability. After World War I, it was occupied by Italy for about three years but regained by the newly independent Republic of Turkey during the War of Independence.
Today, Antalya stands as Turkey’s largest international sea resort along the famed Turkish Riviera. With major development and strong government support, tourism has become its heartbeat—welcoming a record 13.6 million tourists in 2019 alone.
Now, with my own eyes, I could finally see just how beautiful this city truly is—more stunning than I ever imagined. I wanted to explore every resort, every hidden corner, just to take in the beauty of this coastal gem. Maybe it would help recharge whatever strength I had left. I could already feel the trip slowly draining my energy, but I refused to let that stop me. I only had a few days left in this incredible country, and I wanted to make every moment count.
Hamze parked the car, and we stepped out to walk along the nearest seaside, just to unwind. The moment I saw the view, I knew exactly where we were—Lake Van. It was one of the top destinations on my bucket list. I remembered reading that autumn is the perfect season to visit, a time when you feel caught between the crisp onset of winter and the fading warmth of summer. You get the touch of two seasons at once—an unforgettable experience.
As we walked along the shore, I noticed from the corner of my eye that Hamze was busy taking pictures of me. And strangely, I enjoyed it. There’s something comforting about being the subject of someone’s quiet admiration—someone seeing you as worth capturing. With each step I took, it felt like he was right there, snapping a shot in perfect rhythm.
Every time the water lapped against my feet, I felt a jolt of energy surge through me. The cold breeze wrapped around my body, the wind sending shivers down my spine—it all felt like a glimpse of paradise. But deep down, I knew… this was just a fragment of what the afterlife might feel like.