My new hobby every afternoon in weekdays were to watch brothers and the Knights to train.
Next two months, Brother Maxillary would be a trainee but he did not have a plan to be a Knight because in the next few years, he would be the Empire's advisor, just like what he always wanted
He would only train how to use swords in case of emergencies.
He already has the strength he fully inherited from our mother and he did not need to be in a knightage anymore, that was what he had said.
Brother Maxillary, my fourth brother has been always a snob and sarcastic but have soft spots and with great determination with him. He was one of the smartests in the Empire and could solve all the problems but still, all plans were not perfect. He was a genius but not a God.
As I was watching the Knights, my two other brothers, Maxwell and Maxillary who was still not practicing sword were in the garden, playing hide and seek. They even invited me to play with them but I immediately refused, I could not walk in this state and I was afraid they might found out. Dad was on his study, busy on his non-ending papers with the Butler.
I still have not applied an ointment on the painful parts of my body because I did not have time when Kath called for lunch. I did not left the training ground since after lunch and I also did not want to move too much because even little movements hurts.
It was not a wound but bruises and scars. I sat on the corner of the blanket and innocently spread my legs in the cold ground when Kath and I were alone and my three brothers and the Knights continued their practice on the ground. The blanket was warm because of the heat stone but the ground was normally cold because it was winter and the snow that fell for these last few days were not swept that well.
I hissed when the painful parts of my legs touched the cold ground.
"Milady? What are you doing?" Kath asked confusedly. Did she heard me hissed? I bit my lip.
"Nothing. Do not mind me." I replied in a forced smile. I tried to relax myself but because of the pain I was feeling, I could not help myself to extract cold sweats despite the weather.
At dinner...
My eyes stings and felt heavy. I fetl hot and at the same time, cold. I also felt nauseous as if I my surroundings were spinning.
I did not feel like eating right now, all I want to do was to head straight at my room and rest but if I did not eat with them, they would start to doubt that there was something wrong.
My usual seat was in my father's lap and he always feed me with his own spoon. He was already used in doing that whenever we eat breakfast or dinner and I am also starting not to get embarrass.
I feel really sleepy and my head was already falling while eating dinner. I may have really caught a cold. It was Kathelina who noticed first that I was pale even if it was Dad who was holding me.
Knowing my father and brothers, they knew nothing about being sick. They have high body resistance and do not get that sick so easily.
Dad immediately carried me to my room and placed me in my bed when Kath confirmed that I was really burning sick after touching my neck and forehead.
"Call the family doctor! Quick!"
"Get some warm water!"
"We need more blankets here!"
"Towel! Where is the towel?!"
"Close the window and the curtains!"
“Please, hang in there, Maxine.” I heard dad whispered to my ear.
The house became in turmoil but it was all blurry and their noises only hurts my head more. I am not in my right senses and the world around me was spinning in my sight but I know, people were going in and out of my room.
My brothers were only standing silent in the corner for I could not hear any of them, probably did not know what to do. Instead of creating troubles, they stood there silently, watching people come and go.
Before I closed my eyes, I saw Dad who was about to leave my side.
A scene flashed before my eyes. I saw him and Brother Lein smiling at me before turning their backs. I was frightened at the sight. They would not be back again if they leave if I did not stop them.
I should stop them from leaving.
Because that was the day when...
In my weakening strenght, I was able to reach my father's sleeve and prevented him from leaving. He looked at me over his shoulders and in my vague vision, I looked up to him and searched for his face, only to find an undentified expression.
"Dad... do not..." do not leave me Dad. I can not... I do not want to live alone in despair again. I was able to endured it at first but I do not think I could for the second time. My heart was not that strong from the first place.
I was trying to be brave but knowing that you would leave me again, it frightens me. It frightens me that your promise might be broken again.
I did not want that. Brothers and Dad were all important to me. Kath, the Knights, the servants and my friends. I did not want anyone of them die again just because of me. I hate to see them sacrificing because I knew, I am not worth it.
Once was enough but twice was too much. If I have to die for their sake, I am willing just to make sure they are all safe.