The afternoon sun cast a warm glow over the outdoor café as Rainan and Tania settled into a corner table, surrounded by the lively hum of the bustling market. The small café was a quiet escape from the noise, a perfect place for catching up.
"So, how's life treating you?" Tania asked casually, sipping her iced tea, her eyes studying Rainan as he sat back in his chair.
Rainan smiled, his fingers tapping lightly on the edge of his coffee cup. “It’s been... a bit of a rollercoaster, honestly. But I’m good. I left the city and came back home to find some peace, I guess.” He shrugged, trying to downplay the weight of everything that had happened.
Tania raised an eyebrow, sensing there was more to the story. “Peace? Is that all you’re after?” She gave him a teasing smile. “I thought you had it all figured out when we were in high school.”
Rainan chuckled softly, remembering those days. “Yeah, I thought I had everything figured out, too. But I guess life doesn’t really work that way. It throws curveballs when you least expect them.”
Tania nodded, her eyes softening. “I get that. Things change. We change. But it’s good to see you again, Rainan. Really good.” She paused for a moment before continuing, her voice quieter now. “You’ve always been so focused on what others expected of you. I think that’s part of why I admired you. You never let anything get in your way.”
Rainan’s smile faded slightly as he remembered those days. “You’re right. I was always focused on what everyone else wanted me to be. What my parents expected. What the world expected.”
Tania tilted her head, her curiosity piqued. “So... what changed?”
Rainan’s gaze dropped to the coffee in his hands. The words were on the tip of his tongue, and now, with Tania sitting across from him, he felt an urge to finally speak the truth. “Well... a lot of things, I guess. But the biggest thing I had to come to terms with was... myself.” He sighed, gathering his thoughts. “Back when we were together, I thought I could force myself to feel something that wasn’t there. I thought being with you would help me forget someone else. Someone I couldn’t admit to myself.”
Tania didn’t interrupt, sensing the heaviness in his words. She had always known Rainan to be guarded, but there was a vulnerability in him now that she hadn’t seen before.
“Someone else?” she asked, her voice gentle, her eyes searching his face for answers.
Rainan met her gaze, his heart beating a little faster. “Yeah. Someone I couldn’t stop thinking about... Angelo.”
Tania blinked, her expression unchanged. She had always been perceptive, and the truth had never truly escaped her. She leaned back in her chair, giving Rainan the space to continue. “I figured it was him. You two were always... close. Closer than most people realize.”
Rainan’s throat tightened as he tried to explain. “It wasn’t just a friendship. It wasn’t something I could just ignore. But I tried. I thought maybe if I was with you, it would make everything ‘normal,’ make me stop feeling the way I did. But it didn’t work. And it wasn’t fair to you.”
Tania looked at him with a soft understanding. “I knew, Rainan. Back then, I knew your heart was somewhere else. I could feel it.” She gave him a small smile. “But I didn’t press you. I didn’t want to force you to say something you weren’t ready to admit.”
Rainan felt a wave of relief wash over him. He had expected some sort of shock or disappointment, but instead, Tania’s response was full of grace and acceptance. “I’m sorry, Tania,” he said quietly, his voice filled with remorse. “I should’ve been honest with you. I should’ve told you the truth, not just about my feelings, but about why I was with you in the first place.”
Tania reached across the table and placed her hand over his briefly. “You don’t need to apologize, Rainan. I understand. We were both young, and we both tried to figure things out the best we could. I don’t blame you for what happened.”
Rainan looked down at their hands, then back into her eyes. “I just want to thank you for everything, Tania. You were there when I needed someone, even if I didn’t fully appreciate it at the time. And I’m grateful for that. You didn’t deserve to be part of my confusion.”
Tania smiled again, a little more warmly this time. “I know. And I’m glad you’re being honest with me now. It’s been a long time, but I think it’s important for both of us to let go of that part of our past.”
Rainan nodded, feeling a sense of release he hadn’t anticipated. “I’ve been carrying this guilt for so long. I thought if I confessed, it would somehow make things right. But I’m glad you understand.”
“You’ve carried a lot, haven’t you?” Tania said softly. “But you don’t have to carry it alone anymore. It’s okay. And I’m happy for you, Rainan. You deserve to be true to yourself, just like anyone else.”
He smiled gratefully, feeling the weight in his chest slowly lift. “Thank you, Tania. I didn’t know how much I needed to hear that.”
After a brief pause, Tania leaned back in her chair, her eyes glinting with a playful glimmer. “So... what about you and Angelo? Have you talked to him yet?”
Rainan shook his head. “I’m still trying to figure out how to do that. I don’t know if he feels the same way. But I can’t keep lying to myself. I’ve got to be honest with him, too.”
Tania smiled warmly, her tone supportive. “Well, whatever happens, just know you’re doing the right thing by being true to yourself. You’ve got this, Rainan.”
Rainan nodded, his heart a little lighter now. “Thanks, Tania. Really.”
As they finished their drinks, the conversation shifted back to lighter topics, and the afternoon passed by in a blur of catching up. But Rainan felt like a chapter of his past had closed, and in its place, there was a newfound clarity—a sense of peace he hadn’t felt in years.
When they finally stood to leave, Tania gave him one last, reassuring smile. “Take care, Rainan. I’m really glad we talked. You’ll figure things out.”
“I will. And thanks again,” he said, his voice sincere.
As Tania walked off, Rainan stood there for a moment, reflecting on everything that had been said. He didn’t know what the future held, but for the first time in a long time, he felt like he was walking toward it with his head held high.