Caitlin stepped off the bus sluggishly, feeling as unmotivated as ever to head to work. Her steps felt heavy, as if the weight of her job was already pressing on her shoulders before she even entered the building. The five-minute walk from the bus stop to her office felt like a march toward punishment.
It wasn’t physical exhaustion that drained her—it was mental reluctance. The bustling sidewalk filled with other workers created a fast-moving background, contrasting with Caitlin’s slow pace. She stopped in front of the tall building, allowing the crowd to pass her by, indifferent to her presence. Her eyes traced the gleaming glass windows, and for a fleeting moment, she felt like a stranger in her own life.
“Someone could die if they jumped from up there.”
The ‘someone’ she meant was herself. Caitlin found herself occasionally entertaining thoughts of death. The building wasn’t that high, but high enough. Still, she would never actually do something that reckless—she was too much of a coward to cause a scene.
A dark thought flickered through her mind, but she quickly shook it off. Adjusting her glasses, she let out a deep sigh. If only she didn’t need the money, she thought, she would never set foot in this place. Unfortunately, life’s cruel realities forced her to endure, no matter how exhausting it was. Job opportunities were scarce, and the ones available were never truly ideal.
“Work, work, work,” Caitlin muttered to herself, trying to muster some motivation.
After lingering in her thoughts long enough, she finally stepped inside the building. The cold air from the air conditioner greeted her, offering a slight relief from the heat simmering inside her. But that relief was short-lived, replaced by the pressure of the crowd gathering in front of the elevator.
Caitlin squeezed into the group, tucking herself into a corner as she was nudged by a cluster of women chattering excitedly. A blend of various perfumes filled the confined space, their overwhelming scent making her nauseous. The women gossiped animatedly, their cheerful voices making Caitlin feel even more invisible.
“Did you guys hear? Jonas actually greeted me at dinner last night!” one of them squealed.
Caitlin pretended to be absorbed in her phone, scrolling through news she didn’t actually care about. She was used to blending into the background, never the center of attention. Sometimes, she wondered—if she died, would anyone even grieve for her?
The elevator finally reached her floor, and she stepped out with quiet relief. The office was already buzzing with activity, the sound of typing and ringing phones filling the air. She walked toward her desk, tucked away in a corner, nearly hidden behind a mountain of documents. Staring at it with weary eyes, she sighed. The workload never lessened; it felt like time only stood still for her.
“Morning, Jo,” she greeted her colleague in the adjacent cubicle.
Joana Gracia, a red-haired woman, barely lifted her head from her work. She gave Caitlin a brief nod before returning her focus to her tasks. Jo’s desk was significantly tidier than Caitlin’s—something that always sparked a twinge of envy. But Caitlin quickly dismissed the feeling and turned her attention to the leftover files from yesterday that needed to be completed today.
Among the papers, her thoughts wandered to the past. She remembered how Tobey used to praise her for being organized. “How ironic,” she murmured to herself.
Her computer screen suddenly lit up, revealing a wallpaper of her and him. Her expression stiffened as she hurriedly replaced the background with a different image. Those memories had to be erased—just like the work piling up before her.
Joana glanced at her. “Why do you look so down?”
Caitlin simply shook her head, offering a faint smile to mask the sadness. Joana was the only person at work she was somewhat close to, though not entirely. There was something about Joana that made Caitlin feel comfortable talking to her—perhaps because Joana also seemed to understand solitude.
“Caitlin, don’t forget to gather the documents Mr. Alex requested yesterday.”
Joana’s voice pulled Caitlin out of her thoughts. She nodded and scribbled a note in the little notebook on her desk before diving back into her work, sorting through the files that needed to be prioritized.
Time slipped by unnoticed. The office became livelier as the day progressed, her colleagues lost in their own tasks. Yet Caitlin felt like she existed in a different world. She forced herself to focus, but memories of Tobey kept creeping in like a ghost refusing to leave. She recalled their old conversations about the future, about a little house in the countryside surrounded by lush greenery. That dream now felt like a cruel joke. During lunch break, Caitlin remained at her desk. She had no energy to socialize in the cafeteria. Joana, sitting beside her, approached with a cup of coffee.
“You seriously need to stop thinking about your ex. You’re going to waste away,” Joana teased.
Caitlin accepted the coffee with a small, appreciative smile. “I know. Sorry if I’ve been out of it lately.”
But deep down, she knew—forgetting Tobey wasn’t going to be easy. Every corner of the city reminded her of him. Every song she heard seemed to carry echoes of their past.
Joana perched on the edge of Caitlin’s desk, sipping her coffee as she scanned the office. “You know, life’s too short to be stuck in the past. I’ve been where you are—it’s not a great place to be.”
Caitlin studied Joana for a moment. “You’re right, but I don’t think I can move on that quickly.”
Joana gave a small, knowing smile. “It doesn’t have to be quick. But you have to start somewhere. Maybe by meeting someone new? Who knows, it might be a good change.”
Caitlin merely nodded, though uncertainty still lingered in her heart. The thought of meeting someone new felt overwhelming when her heart was still weighed down by the past. But she knew Joana was right. Life had to go on, even if it meant leaving behind the things she once cherished.
The day passed as uneventfully as ever—monotonous and dull. When work hours ended, Caitlin tidied up her desk, ensuring no documents were left unfinished. She stole a glance out the window, watching as the sun dipped below the horizon. The sky looked melancholic, as if it, too, could feel her emotions.
With slow, weary steps, Caitlin left the office, heading back to a life filled with unanswered questions. But deep inside, she knew—tomorrow would bring new possibilities. And maybe, just maybe, one day, she would finally find a way to let go of Tobey.