Chapter 10: Heart Attack
The early morning air was thick with humidity as the sound of distant sirens echoed through the streets. Loraine sat in the back of the ambulance, double-checking her supplies while waiting for their next call. The city had been relatively quiet for the past hour, but the uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach told her it wouldn’t last long.
Conrad leaned against the driver’s seat, sipping his coffee, his eyes half-closed.
"You should get some rest, too," he said, glancing at Loraine through the rearview mirror.
"I’m fine," Loraine replied, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Just thinking about how unpredictable everything is. One moment, everything’s fine, and the next…"
The crackle of the radio interrupted her.
"Dispatch to Unit 4, we have a report of an elderly male, approximately 72 years old, suffering a suspected heart attack. Address is 314 Maple Avenue. Neighbors say he's unconscious."
Loraine and Conrad locked eyes. Without a word, Conrad tossed his coffee aside and jumped into the driver’s seat, flipping the switch for the sirens. Loraine secured her seatbelt, her heart already pounding with adrenaline. They’d been on many high-stakes calls before, but a heart attack was always a race against time.
"Let’s move," Conrad muttered as he hit the gas, weaving through early morning traffic.
---
They arrived at the address within minutes. A small crowd of neighbors had gathered outside a modest house, their anxious faces lit by the flashing ambulance lights. Loraine grabbed her gear and rushed toward the front door, Conrad right behind her.
A middle-aged woman stood on the porch, wringing her hands in distress.
"He’s inside! Please, he’s my father. I found him collapsed in the living room."
"Ma’am, stay calm. We’re here to help," Loraine said, her voice steady despite the tension in the air. She exchanged a brief glance with Conrad before they entered the house.
Inside, the living room was eerily quiet except for the faint ticking of a clock on the wall. Lying on the floor, an elderly man with gray hair was motionless, his face pale and his chest rising and falling in shallow, uneven breaths.
"Mr. Hawkins?" Loraine called as she knelt beside him, quickly checking his pulse. It was weak, barely there. She immediately started chest compressions, counting under her breath while Conrad set up the defibrillator.
"Pulse is faint," Loraine said, her voice tight.
"We need to get him out of here and to the hospital fast."
Conrad nodded, attaching the electrodes to the man’s chest. The machine beeped, analyzing the heart rhythm.
"Stand clear!" he called out, pressing the button to deliver the first shock.
The man’s body jolted slightly, but there was no immediate change. Loraine continued compressions, her hands moving steadily as she fought the sinking feeling in her chest.
"Come on, come on," she whispered to herself.
The machine beeped again.
"Shock advised. Clear!" Conrad delivered another shock, but Mr. Hawkins’ condition remained critical. Time was slipping away.
"We need to move him," Loraine said, her voice cracking slightly. She grabbed the stretcher as Conrad lifted Mr. Hawkins onto it, carefully but swiftly.
As they rushed back to the ambulance, the man’s daughter stood in the doorway, tears streaming down her face.
"Is he going to be okay?"
Loraine forced a smile, though her heart ached for the woman.
"We’re doing everything we can," she said before closing the ambulance doors.
---
Inside the ambulance, Loraine’s hands trembled as she worked frantically to keep Mr. Hawkins stable. She inserted an IV, administering medications to try and stabilize his heart rate. Conrad drove with precision, weaving through traffic at high speed while glancing back to check on Loraine’s progress.
"His pulse is still weak!" Loraine shouted over the noise of the sirens. "He’s not responding to the meds."
"Keep going," Conrad urged, his voice steady despite the tension in the air. "We’re almost there."
Loraine nodded, but a sinking feeling in her gut told her they were running out of time. She continued chest compressions, her mind racing. She had trained for moments like this, but no amount of training could prepare her for the emotional weight of trying to save someone’s life—and the possibility of failing.
"Come on, Mr. Hawkins," she whispered, her voice barely audible as she fought back the tears that threatened to spill over. "You have to make it."
But deep down, she knew the odds were against them.
As they neared the hospital, Conrad’s voice cut through the tension. "We’re almost there, Loraine. Just hold on."
The ambulance screeched to a halt in front of the emergency entrance. Hospital staff rushed out with a gurney, and Loraine and Conrad quickly transferred Mr. Hawkins to their care.
"Seventy-two-year-old male, cardiac arrest, weak pulse, unresponsive to defibrillation," Loraine reported breathlessly as the ER team wheeled him inside. She watched as they disappeared through the doors, her heart still pounding with adrenaline.
---
The waiting room felt cold and sterile. Loraine sat on a bench, her hands clasped tightly in her lap as she stared at the floor. Conrad stood nearby, his arms crossed, watching her silently.
After what felt like an eternity, a doctor emerged from the emergency room, his expression somber. Loraine’s heart sank before he even spoke.
"I’m sorry," the doctor said quietly, shaking his head. "We did everything we could, but Mr. Hawkins didn’t make it."
Loraine felt the words hit her like a punch to the gut. She had known the odds were slim, but hearing it out loud made it real. Her throat tightened, and tears blurred her vision as she stood up, her legs feeling weak beneath her.
The doctor placed a hand on her shoulder, offering a look of sympathy before walking away, leaving Loraine alone with her grief.
Conrad approached her slowly, his expression softening. "Loraine…"
"I couldn’t save him," Loraine whispered, her voice shaking as tears streamed down her cheeks. "I tried everything, but… it wasn’t enough."
Conrad wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. "It’s not your fault. You did everything you could."
"I should have been faster," she said, her voice muffled against his chest. "If we had gotten there just a little sooner… maybe…"
"Loraine, listen to me," Conrad said gently, lifting her chin so she could meet his gaze. "There’s no way you could have known. Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, it’s out of our hands. You can’t blame yourself for that."
Loraine sobbed quietly, burying her face in Conrad’s chest. "It’s just… I feel like I failed him. And his daughter… she was counting on us."
Conrad held her tighter, letting her cry. "I know. But you didn’t fail. You gave him a fighting chance. That’s all we can do."
For a few moments, they stood in silence, Loraine’s tears soaking into Conrad’s shirt. He didn’t let go, offering her the comfort she so desperately needed. 
After a while, Loraine pulled back slightly, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "I just… I don’t know how you do it. How do you deal with losing someone like that?"
Conrad sighed, his gaze distant. "It’s never easy. But we can’t let it break us. If we carry every loss with us, we’ll drown in it. We honor them by doing the best we can for the next person who needs us."
Loraine nodded, though her heart still felt heavy. "I guess I just wasn’t ready for this part of the job."
"No one ever is," Conrad said softly. "But you’re strong, Loraine. You care so much about the people we help, and that’s what makes you a great paramedic. Don’t lose that."
She offered a small, shaky smile. "Thanks, Conrad. I don’t know what I’d do without you."
"You’ll never have to find out," Conrad replied, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. "I’ll always be here, no matter what."
As they stood together in the quiet hospital hallway, Loraine felt a sense of comfort in his presence. She wasn’t alone in this—Conrad was with her, and together, they would face whatever came next.