SAM POV
"Why bother?" This question echoed in my mind like a relentless chant, teasing me with its simple yet unanswerable nature. I felt trapped in a cycle of doing nothing, unable to summon the energy to break free from the suffocating grip of my own thoughts. Even on my days off, when the world presented endless possibilities, I chose to retreat into the comfort of my room, where the only company was the lingering memory of Tristan's last words before he left me in that cold, unforgiving elevator.
As I accepted Kent's request, his face brightened with joy, his eyes radiating happiness. It contrasted sharply with the deep sadness I felt, a reminder of the love I had lost and the lingering pain.
But even as I smiled at Kent, a part of me couldn't shake the bitterness. Love, they say, is lovely, connecting souls in shared dreams and desires. But for me, love had become a cruel game, making me feel foolish and alone.
Perhaps love is indeed harsh, I thought bitterly, as I witnessed Kent's expression soften with genuine affection. Maybe it's true what they say, that love can lift us up to great heights and drag us down to dark depths. But for now, all I could do was smile and pretend that the ache in my chest wasn't real, that Tristan's memories didn't haunt me constantly.
And yeah, for the past two weeks, I did realize why my heart and whole system seemed to go crazy whenever Tristan approached me. I was already falling for him.
I fell in love with him. I really do, but it's too late to answer his 'I love you' because he's gone. He left me.
"By the way, it's tomorrow, so we need to wake up early to avoid traffic going to Manila," Kent added, his words bringing me back to the present. I blinked, momentarily surprised by his change of topic.
"Manila? Your parents' anniversary party will be held in Manila?" I asked in disbelief, slowly realizing the implications. The thought of returning to Manila filled me with a mix of excitement and apprehension, knowing it would mean encountering Tristan once more.
Oh no! Surely, Tristan and I will cross paths if I return to Manila! How will I handle it if we meet at the party? Will he acknowledge me? Or will I end up chasing after him? I hope not, I don't want to seem desperate for his attention! Who is he, anyway?
Kent nodded, a hint of pride visible in his smile. "Yep, that's right. It's going to be a big celebration, and my parents wanted to do it in Manila to make it extra special," he explained, his excitement evident. "It's been years since we've had a family gathering like this, so they wanted to go all out."
As Kent spoke, I couldn't shake the nervousness about returning to the city where Tristan and I had shared unmemorable memories. The idea of seeing him again made me shiver, the memories of our last meeting still vivid in my mind.
"Sounds like it'll be quite the event," I replied, mustering a smile despite the inner turmoil. "I'll wrap up my work early so I can head home and relax."
Kent nodded in agreement, his smile widening. "That's the attitude! And don't worry, I'll drive you home," he reassured me, his tone filled with genuine care. "You deserve to unwind after a long day."
I returned his smile, though it felt strained. Despite his good intentions, I couldn't shake the uneasy feeling that had enveloped me. The idea of going back to Manila hung over me like a shadow, a constant reminder of the lingering emotions between Tristan and me.
As Kent quickly said goodbye and vanished into the bustling building, I stood frozen, a mix of emotions swirling within me. As he disappeared from sight, I released a heavy sigh, my hand instinctively finding its place over my chest where my heart pounded.
My heart was excited, its irregular beats showing the nervous anticipation I felt. Yet, despite the thrill, I couldn't fully embrace it. Instead, a profound sense of dread settled in my stomach, casting a shadow over the impending reunion with Tristan.
It was my fault, I silently admitted to myself, my thoughts swirling with self-blame. I had let my insecurities and fears control me, accusing Tristan hurtfully in a misguided attempt to protect myself from pain. Now, faced with the idea of seeing him again, I regretted the harsh words exchanged between us.
Yes, I regretted my hurtful accusations, but more than that, I lacked the courage to deal with the aftermath. I wasn't prepared to confront Tristan, to meet his eyes and witness the pain I caused. I wasn't ready to admit my vulnerability, to acknowledge the depth of my feelings for him.
"Oh please, no," I whispered urgently, my voice barely audible amidst the bustling lobby. "Don't let us meet yet. Please, not now, I'm begging you..."
But even as the words escaped me, I knew my plead might be ignored. Fate had a cruel way of connecting our lives, forming a complicated blend of love and pain that appeared destined to bring us back together.
With a heavy heart, I urged myself to set aside my fears and doubts, preparing for the unavoidable reunion ahead. As I made my way through the crowded lobby, uncertainty burdened me, each step forward bringing me closer to the looming moment of truth.
Yet, amidst the uncertainty, a glimmer of hope remained, a silent wish that maybe, just maybe, things would change this time. Perhaps Tristan and I could repair the damage that separated us, stitching together the broken pieces of our hearts and finding a way forward together.
Only time would tell. But for now, all I could do was ready myself for the trials ahead, hoping that everything would return to normal.