Every passing day I always felt a severe headache that I can't hold back from the pain that I felt. My parents panicked and called my Doctor. And as expected my condition is getting worse. Shane cried non-stop that day when I had an attack. She begged me to return to the hospital for treatment. But I refuse because my Doctor already said that my time is closing in. 
I don’t want to waste my remaining time in the hospital. I wanted to be with my loved ones and spend my time with them.
One morning I told my dad that I wanted to go out to the garden to have some fresh air. He and mom accompanied me there. They brought some food and drinks if I ever wanted to eat. 
The fresh and cool air that brushes on my skin felt good. I felt refreshed but I also felt sadness in my heart. I wonder if this was the last time I felt the cool breeze of fresh air together with my family.
Sometimes I honestly felt angry at the one who created me, the one and only our mighty God. I asked him why I needed to leave this beautiful world. Why do I need to leave my family and bring pain to their hearts? I just wanted to live a peaceful and happy life with the one I love the most but why? Why do I need to die like this?
 After talking to God in silence I just cried and started apologizing to him. And the realization came to me that there’s nothing permanent in this world, even the animals and trees will die and be reborn. I wonder if I die soon will I be reborn again?
“Roxy..” My mom is softly calling my name when she sees me looking afar.
I snap and smile at her, “Mommy, I love you. You too Dad I love you.”
They hugged me with a sad smile on their faces. I know they wanted to cry again but they held it back for me.
“We know Baby. Your dad and I also love you so much. Roxy, don't forget that okay.”
I held their hand and I started talking slowly. I wanted to tell them everything that I need to say while I can. They got what I mean and sat beside me.
“Mom, Dad, I remember when I was a kid you both always pampered me and spoiled me too much. I got everything that I wanted. You do everything just to make me happy. Even now you agreed to my request to stay home and be with you. I’m so thankful and blessed to have you as my parents. Thank you so much for everything Mom, Dad.”
My tears began to fall. They hugged me tightly while also tearing up seeing me and hearing me like I’m saying my final word for them.
“Dad, Mom, I’m sorry that I need to leave you both anytime soon. I’m sorry that I can’t take care of you in the future. I’m sorry that I may not be here to see you grow old having white hair but still beautiful and handsome,” I said while smiling but also crying.
“Roxy, baby please don’t say you're sorry. We know how much you love us. We know how much you cared for us. We’re so sorry that you need to face a hardship like this baby. If only we can share our own life with you we will do it, for you to stay in our life, to our side,” mom said.
“Roxy, you did your best in life. You know that we can’t live without you baby. That's why if you ever leave us soon please endure a little and wait for us to come to you as soon as our time comes,” dad said while crying so hard.
We hugged each other while crying. I already accepted my faith as well as my parents. I asked them if I’m gone please bury me near the trees and flowers. Because that is the place where the birds and butterflies oftenly come so I will not be sad being alone.
 I also asked them to donate a huge amount of money to the organization that I went to when I’m confused about myself and being rebellious to my mother at that time. That’s the organization when Shane and I meet.
I also asked them to promote my secretary Rhian as a Manager in my company. She helps me a lot and she’s a capable person. I believed in her skills and dedication in working hard. I know she will be a big help to the company in the future. I also asked them to adopt children in the orphanage so that they won’t be lonely without me. Treat them and raise them like their own child.
 I jokingly said that if they adopt a newborn baby, maybe I will be reborn in one of them and we can be together again in the future. My mom just smiled at me and said that they know that I will always be around them when I’m gone.
That night Shane visited me. She looks so tired so I asked mom to cook nutritious food for her and give her some stress medicine. She hugged me while we were laying in bed.
“Love, I wanted to stay by your side. I don’t want to go to work for a while, is it okay?” Shane asked me.
“If that’s what you want, love. I also think that you need a rest. You look so tired you're not in good health now. Please take care of your health Shane. It makes me sad seeing you like this.”
“Don’t worry about me love. I’m okay, I'm just tired. Roxy, please stay with me longer. I need your love. I need you, you're my source of energy, my life.”
I faced her and caressed her lips. I kissed her gently, “Shane, when I’m gone please take good care of my parents. Visit them occasionally or every time you are free. Can you do it for me?”
“Roxy, please don’t say that like you are bidding goodbyes. I can’t also live without you in my life you know that. Please..please don’t leave us please!” She said while crying.
I lifted her chin and wiped her tears, “Love, I’m so sorry that I will leave you like this. I also don’t want to leave you. I love you so much Shane, but I already did my mission here in this world. That's why God wanted to meet me anytime soon. Please Shane, promise me that you will live a good life even without me around. 
I promise that I will always be by your side to watch you always. I’m so sorry if you need to go through this pain because of me. I hope that you will smile often, thinking that I am just around you always. I love you so much Shane, you are the only one for me even in the afterlife.”
I can’t hold back anymore. I cried that night. It’s so painful to leave your loved ones. It’s breaking my heart watching them cry but I can’t do anything. All I can do is to assure them that after I’m gone I will always watch them from heaven. And I'll always be there for them in the afterlife.
I woke up in the morning and everything is white. I walked around until I saw a way ahead of me. I ran that way and finally I stepped foot in a beautiful garden. The place is full of flowers and small trees. So many birds and butterflies are flying around the area. 
I saw a fountain and I walked until I reached the place. The water was so clear suddenly an image appeared on it. I saw my family and my beloved woman crying in front of a grave.
Then I realized that I drew my last breath last night. My tears began to fall seeing them crying in front of my grave. But I also feel relieved that I was able to talk to them last night and say my last word to them. 
I just hope that even when I'm gone they still live their life to the fullest. I will be waiting for them here in the afterlife.
A man suddenly appeared in front of me and said, “You did a great job my child. You live your life well. Be happy and wait for the right time to be with them.”
He hugged me tightly. The sadness that I felt vanished in an instant. I felt I was reborn again. He’s right I just need to wait for us to be together again. From now on I will always watch them from here and be there for them always.